Spark of Jewish Experience

This article was constructed with the help of Dr. Robert Goldman-Psychologist at Yeshiva Chafetz Chaim and Rabbi Yitzchak Aminov   

Guy is driving in suburban Jerusalem when he sees a sign: “talking dog for sale”. “WOW!” he says “I gotta see this!”

The man rings the bell. The owner directs the man to the back yard where the dog is lounging, sipping on a pina colada.

The man asks, “so you can talk?” The dog answers “yep.” “So tell me your story” the man asks. The dog answers “well, I discovered I can talk when I was very young and I wanted to use my abilities to help others out. So I informed the Mosaad agency (Israeli intelligence) about my gift. I was working in no time. I was sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders and suspected terrorists. Because No one realized a dog can eavesdrop, I was one of their most valuable agents for eight years.

However it was exhausting work; it really tired me out. I knew I wasn’t getting any younger and wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a less stressful job at Ben-Gurian Airport to do some under cover security work. I was wondering near suspicious characters and listening in. During this period of time I got married and had a mess of puppies, so now I’m just retired.”

Guy was amazed!!

He asked the owner how much he wants for the dog.

The answer was $10.

The man was astonished “why so cheap?”

The owner answers back, “the dog is a liar; he never worked for the Mossad.”

We should ask ourselves, are we careful when we speak to people?

How many of us really keep our word?

How many of us will grow big noses if the Pinocchio concept holds truth?

This week one of the subjects discussed in the parshiot are vows.

Perhaps it will be interesting to explore the reasons why man makes vows. And more importantly, how will he be able to keep his vows.

If one only knew the importance of keeping a vow he would be a little more careful.

We all learned about the famous dream that our forefather Yaakov had. There were a set of Angels going up and a set of Angels were going down a later. When he woke up he realized the importance of the place he was in and that G-d is sending him a message. Yaakov responded by telling G-d “I will do your will but please protect and sustain me. Then I will make a covenant on this very ground”.

Many years past and Yaakov weathered many storms. He survived his dangerous brother, Eisav, who hated him and survived the evil Lavan, his father in law. Yaakov entered the land of Israel and settled there for a while. He even passed “the place”; however no covenant was made.

Yaakov’s quite and tranquil time ended abruptly where he encountered the rape of his daughter, Dina, and the disappearance of his son, Yosef. Our sages tell us this was due partially because he didn’t keep his word and make the covenant. G-d had to give Yaakov a reminder; HELLO!! And order him to make the covenant.

How can our forefather, Yaakov forget?

Many people who make vows mean well and intend to keep them. However situations change and many find it difficult to keep.

Let us examine what transpires when a person makes a vow and what occurs after that one has a change of heart.

There was a man by the name of Palti ben Laish who was forced to marry the beautiful Michal, King Shaul’s daughter. One may say this is a dream come true, to marry the King of Israel’s daughter; he’s set for life. However, there was an underlying problem; the King tried to annul Michal’s first marriage to one named David ben Ishai whom Shaul despised.

The first marriage was valid, nevertheless the king decreed she is no longer married to David. Now, who has the nerve to argue with the king?

What is Palti to do?

SHE’S A MARRIED WOMAN!!

The punishment is Sevier.

When Palti and Michal came to their honeymoon suite, Palti did something profound. He stuck his sword right in the middle of the bed and proclaimed “I do not touch a married woman!! No one shall remove it!!”

Rav Chaim Shmulevitz asks, “that’s beautiful, hey, a dramatic pause please!! Nevertheless when time passes and the couple warms up to each other, do you really think a dead idle sword will stand in the way of PASSION?!

Rav Chaim answers, “he stuck the sword there purposely. It will always remind him of the definitive strong emotions he had when stating, without a doubt, she is forbidden!! SHE IS NOT HIS!! And that reminder will enable him to stop.

Dr. Goldman points out when one makes a vow, at that moment, he’s enthusiastic and emotionally exited about making the statement. However as time goes on, chances are the enthusiasm will decrease. It is not the same. Therefore the absent of the feeling causes him to be forgetful or think it’s difficult to keep.

Rav Aminov says a person can go to a Rav and annul his vow petach atara on the grounds that it is too difficult. However, one should know swearing and making vows, especially using G-d’s name should not be taken lightly; it’s a stringent Torah law.

There was an outcast warrior among the Jews by the name of Yiftach. The Jews had no choice but to choose him. He was their only chance to win the war.

When the Jews were victorious Yiftach said something foolishly. In his enthusiasm and love for G-d, he vowed “the first thing that comes out of my house I will sacrifice to HAKADOSH-BARUCH-HUE. Of course he had in mine an ox or a sheep. However, this Cinderrella story took a different and nasty turn. When he returned from the battlefield, his daughter came out. Unfortunately, Yiftach took his vows pretty seriously and fully intended to take his daughter to the slaughter.

Yiftach could have annulled the vow, but instead he rationalized it was beneath his dignity to go to the high priest, Pinchas to ask for the annulment. His ego failed his daughter; so much for priorities. Apparently she did not die however she was considered HEKDESH-changed status therefore not permitted to marry. She withered away like an old maid.

We see from the Torah that vows were taken very seriously. Yosef went through painstaking efforts to honor his father’s request to be buried in Israel. Before leaving Egypt, Moshe, the leader of the Israelites searched through all of Egypt to find Yosef’s bones to be transferred to the promised land.

Astonishingly the sea split when it saw Yossef’s bones. The reason was because of Yossef’s merits, though also, because of Moshe’s ability to keep a vow.

Vows were meant to make us better human beings. However sometimes it seems like one takes upon himself too much. We read in our evening prayer “take away the Satan (evil inclination) from before us and from behind us.” It makes sense that the satan is in front of us; He puts many enticing thing in front of our eyes. But what is meant by the satan enticing us from behind?

The Sages answer that he comes up behind us and pushes us forward and says “hey, you can do it; you’re ready”. The problem is, you’re really not ready yet. This is perhaps dangerous because if one stumbles and falls he might have a very hard time getting up. Sometimes one never can recover.

So a man makes a vow to improve his status as a Jew, as a human being. However, at times, due to the evil inclination he over-reacts because of his enthusiasm.

I find the joke about the talking dog a bit humorous. When I read it a second time it occurred to me, that even though it’s just a joke, the dog’s value plummeted because he lied. The same goes for mankind; a person’s value decreases if one doesn’t keep his word. It’s an important lesson everyone should take to heart and be sensitive to, including yours truly.