DON’T LOOK!! At times with that look one can really pay the price. Such is the case in this week’s Parsha, where our Jewish soldier is in the battlefield against the enemy and he sees a beautiful woman, the enemy. The soldier is smitten by her and desires her. The Torah raises its hands and says, “We know we can’t stop that burning desire, sure you want her. Well, you can have her. However, a few conditions have to be met.” If after those conditions are met and he still wants to marry her then it is permissible. However, chances are great that eventually you will come to hate her. This look and desire is a recipe for disaster.
We find another famous incident where that look was a very costly one. Where, it was against the wishes of the Torah; against the wishes of his parents; a man so holy, a man with such power could fall and get manipulated so badly.
Manipulation is a weapon we all use. Wait! That’s not what I mean. I meant it in a good way. We are all born with great gifts. However, some people can’t figure out their positive attributes even if it was staring them straight in the face. In fact, it’s our duty is to draw the positive from friends, children, wives, students, employees. This can be artfully done through manipulation. However, sometimes people manipulate others’ weaknesses and use it against them, in order to selfishly gain. When they get their way, they dispose their victims rather conveniently. Such is the case with Shimshon and Delila.
Man is made up of a four chemical makeup: fire, water, wind, and sand. Depending on each individual, the chemical makeup differs. If fire is dominant, then a person tendency’s is toward anger or toward pursuit of honor. When fire is lit, if one notices, it tends to go up; the same with a person who desires kavod – honor – if he receives just a slight compliment, his ego goes up, up and away. If one tends to gravitate towards water, then he’s more prone to lusty bodily desires; that’s what’s on his mind. Wind is lightheadedness and sand is laziness and depression.
Shimshon’s parents’ prayers were answered and after many years, they had a baby boy. However, the messenger, an angel, informed Shimshon’s mother “The baby you will have cannot drink wine and cut his hair.” Shimshon had tremendous strength and the secret of his strength was his nezerut (refraining from wine and a good barber).
Shimshon had a tendency to gravitate towards non-Jewish women. His first wife was burned by the Jews’ bitter enemy Philishtim. His second wife, Delila, also not Jewish, was beautiful and Shimshon was smitten by her. Why did she marry him? Well, he wasn’t exactly your typical Jewish accountant. He was strong and the Philishtim were scared of him.
Delila was genuinely a good person; however as time went on, she got corrupted. The spies of the Philishtim came over to Delila and offered her tremendous wealth and status. Then after the first meeting went so well, the officers came up to her place. Delila was flattered; she received so much attention and kavod. They knew how to manipulate her. A good person can deteriorate. Some say she had an affair; others say she had an affair with the money, with the kavod. Delila was sold and she went to work for the Philishtim. She was to find out the secret of her husband’s power. She tortured him, refraining from sexual relations unless he reveals his secret. She nagged him and at times crying, “You don’t love me.” Apparently, she knew how to manipulate him. It’s hard for a man to be blackmailed with having physical relations. However, he can overcome and be strong. There was one important factor in this relationship; he loved her more then she loved him and she knew it!
Shimshon was a very holy and great man who was extremely sincere and loved G-d very much. One should never do what Shimshon did; he invited G-d to test his weakness. We tend to get all gung-ho about our religious level and sometimes we pray and say things that will haunt us later. Shimshon eventually revealed his secret and Delila quickly passed it on to the Philishtim contacts. Tragic ending to Shimshon.
At a banquet where all the major officers of the Philishtim army came to celebrate the capture of Shimshon who was chained to the great pillar at the banquet, Shimshon, who’s eyes were gorged out, prayed one last time to G-d to forgive him and give him strength this one last time. G-d answered his prayer and with one thrust, he brought down the pillars and the building, and killed everyone, including himself.
Manipulation is a way of life; it’s a tool that can be used to make people better or destroy them. Shimshon and Delila at first cared for each other, apparently, Shimshon cared for her more. It’s always beautiful in the beginning. However, Shimshon didn’t follow the Torah and its warnings; he followed his eyes and that’s what destroyed him. |
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