Archive for Rabbi Avi Matmon

The Power of Names

August 21, 2013 Jewish Values No comments

 

Name tag

 

 

Any self-improvement course, for example Dale Carnegie, will emphasize that if one is to achieve the keys to success, one has to incorporate an ability of remembering names. Calling somebody by his or her name, draws them closer and will give them the feeling of, ‘Hey, I’m important’. The reason for this is that a name is the essence of who we are.

 

The weekly Torah reading (parasha), begins with ‘”Vayikra el Moshe” – and [G-d] called to Moshe’. Our sages teach us that Moshe was given ten names, and each name represents a facet of his personality. Batya,Pharaoh’s daughter, who went against her father’s decree, which was to kill all Jewish male newborns, drew the basket containing baby Moshe, out of the water. Moshe is the name she picked. But apparently, there is a linguistic problem with the name.   The name Moshe means “will draw from the water” as opposed to Mashehu, drew from the water – past tense. If the Torah wants to reward Pharaoh’s daughter and to glorify the courageous, self-sacrificing act she did, why is he called Moshe? Mashehu is better suited. We learn from our sages that when G-d created Adam, the angels asked, “What is the nature of man?” Whereas G-d replied, “His wisdom will exceed yours”. This was demonstrated by man naming all beings of creation something no angel could master. It’s an accomplished task and takes great wisdom to accurately give someone his or her true name.

 

The sages say G-d gave divine spirit to fathers, a gifted trait passed down from Adam to incorporate names to their newborns. Of course the father has to be in unison with the mother. The word ‘name’ in Hebrew is pronounced ‘shem’. If one changes the vowels under the letters of shem, it would be pronounced ‘sham’ meaning ‘there’, indicating one has to go there, has to get to a destination for one to complete his task which is associated with his name. Shem and sham are incorporated in the word ne-sham-mah (soul). Man’s soul is brought down in this world to fulfill his mission. The Torah hints of people who have fulfilled their name potential. The Torah sometimes writes ‘ushemo David’ (his name is David), ushemo Manoah (his name is Manoah), ‘ushemo Mordechai’, etc. Before the name, there is an introduction, a chaperone, ‘Ushemo’. This indicates that he will be seated (sham) there in the ultimate destination – heaven. However, the Torah indicates there are those that are written “Naval shemo”.  Here the shemo follows the individual name indicating he did not accomplish his task in this world.

 

Moshe has ten names, each indicating a separate dimension of his multi-faceted personality. Each name portrays a side not described by the other. Yet, it was the name Moshe by which he was known. Apparently, this name, more than others, is the central feature of his personality. Batya prophesized that this baby boy will draw people out of trouble. His task will be to help the Jewish people and to lead them out of slavery. The measure of kindness that Batya showed towards this boy was tremendous.  However, the emphasis is not on her accomplishments, but on the potential she saw in this child, which prompted her to call him Moshe.

Marble Cake

August 21, 2013 Brachos, Mitzvot and Traditions No comments

 

 Marble Cake

 

 

One of the staples in a synagogue – besides Kiddush wine – is “marble cake”. This is universal, whether it’s Sephardic, Ashkenazi or even Bukarian. We know a hamotzi or mezonot is needed for the requirement of a meal. Therefore, you will always find cake at happy occasions to fulfill this mission. According to our sages, human nature shows tremendous favoritism when we are introduced to something for the first time. Perhaps that’s why childhood experiences are vital in understanding a person’s actions, because the inception makes a huge impression and shapes his future. Possibly, that’s why Jewish law forbids testimony of one party while the other is not present. The judge tends to favor the first words he hears. For me, there definitely is an association between marble cake and childhood, whether it is in synagogue or mom’s weekly shopping indulgence at our favorite bakery. I could not wait to tear open the rectangular white box containing that delicious chocolate frosted marble cake.

 

Furthermore, Bar Mitzvah celebrations in our elementary school consisted of a tradition of going from class to class with a box of marble cake and a bottle of scotch. The proud Bar Mitzvah boy offered a l’chaim to the Rabbi in a little shot glass with a piece of marble cake. We all watched as the rabbi dunked the piece of marble cake into the scotch and ate it. The scent resulting from the cake-scotch combination would make us hungry. Every time there is a Kiddush today, the first order of business is scotch and marble cake. Those of you who were with us last week learned the concept of ikar-main food, and tofel- secondary. The mezonot (cake, main food) is considered more important than shehakol (scotch, secondary). Therefore, one would only say the blessing mezonot. Scotch is considered a precious commodity by many – including yours truly. Regardless of these strong feelings, it is secondary in the case of the dunking.

Today, when we are yearning for that marble cake taste of yesteryear or perhaps when one has developed a more mature taste, one would wonder where they can satisfy that particular craving. For starters, there’s excellent marble cake at Kaffs Bakery in Williamsburg, Brooklyn; Ostrovitsky’s Bakery in Flatbush; or Queens Pita on Main St. Whether chocolate frosting is on their marble cake or not, it is amazing. I’m sure there are many others that we missed. If there are others, an email would be appreciated.

 

My parents often took pride in their Bukarian hospitality as being the best. Visiting other ethnic Jewish communities over the years, I find them also boasting that their hospitality is the best. So much for cultural superiority; for many Jews, hospitality and Shabbat go hand and hand. When the marble cake makes its entrance after a four course Shabbat meal, do we make a bracha on the cake?

 

Cakes serve as a dual function. It could be eaten as a dessert or snack in order to satisfy one’s desire for sweets. However, cakes are also often eaten to satisfy one’s appetite. Accordingly, if cakes are eaten for dessert, a bracha should be required. But if cake is eaten for satiation, a bracha is not required. There is however, another consideration; there are some mezonot that fall under the category of bread, so no bracha is necessary. It is important to note every community has slightly different laws and one should ask their local Rabbi.

Respect of Privacy

August 20, 2013 Jewish Values No comments

 

Privacy

 

           In this week’s Parasha (Torah reading), many details are given about the Mishkan (tabernacle) and the high priest’s attire. We learn that there are many interesting items that the kohen gadol is required to wear. One in particular are bells (pa’amonim). Why is G-d requiring the high priest to wear bells? It’s hard to imagine the priest walking towards the kodesh hakodoshim, the special concealed room where he prays for life for the Jewish people on Yom Kippur, dingiling along.

 

Why are bells part of the wardrobe? “Respect” is one of the reasons the commentaries give. Respect? Respect for what? It seems quite the opposite. One would be causing a tremendous annoyance walking with noisy bells rattling. The kohen gadol is a very respected person in the Jewish nation. He’s not a goat! But the bells are deemed not less important then the rest of the items in the Mishkan. We learn a valuable lesson from these bells. The kohen gadol should not enter the kodesh hakadashim unannounced. G-d requires the high priest to ring the bell before entering His special home. It’s as if he’s ringing the doorbell and asking G-d, “May I come in”? Some commentaries say this is the original source for ringing a doorbell before entering one’s house.

 

We see the importance of privacy and kavod. One should show sensitivity to respecting one’s space, and in this case, G-d’s space. Privacy is deeply rooted in Judaism. The giving of the Torah is often compared to a husband and wife, which is equivalent to G-d and the Jewish people. One of the most important aspects of building a couple’s bond is strengthening the intimacy between them. It’s not a coincidence the Torah was given in the desert. Just like in the desert, G-d and the Jews were left alone, so too, should a couple be given their privacy.

 

Dr. Goldman, a psychologist, working at Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim says, “A person being violated of their privacy is affected in a tremendous way. It’s built into the human psyche, the non-tolerance of intrusion. Therefore, a person’s dignity is compromised and he feels defensive, affecting ones self-esteem. A person feels not worthy of being treated with dignity.”

 

It’s a big problem today with family members-relatives who think they have a 24/7 green light to enter the confines of someone’s home. People should show sensitivity in not violating their fellow’s space and to give ample warning of visitation and wait for permission for entrance. The various items found in the mishkan and on the kohen gadol’s clothing are symbolic of man’s creativity. The pa’amonim (bells) are man’s ability to achieve the highest level of creativity through privacy.

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

August 20, 2013 G-d and Us No comments

 

 

Why was the rainbow chosen as a symbol of peace between G-d and mankind?
G-d said, “When I brought the flood, my bow was drawn against man.” The rainbow resembles a reverse bow, signifying that there shall be no more arrows from heaven sent to destroy humanity.
G-d commanded Noach P’ru u’rivu – be fruitful and multiply. However, Noach was discouraged after leaving the ark and seeing the devastation. The rainbow is a reassurance along with a statement in the Shema that “you and your children will live long on the land that I swore to your fathers.” You will live long without another flood.
In the time of King Chizkiyahu and of the Men Of The Great Assembly (which includes Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai), the Jews reached a very high level of spirituality and righteousness. (In Chizkiyahu’s time, even little children were well-versed in complicated halachic matters.) These two generations did not need the reassurance of the rainbow or the covenant which it represented, since their great merits protected them.
It is a custom in Israel and in some neighborhoods in the New York area that the children carry bows on Lag Ba’omer. The reason is to commemorate Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, in whose generation, no rainbow was seen. (Note that in Hebrew the words “bow” and “rainbow” are the same – KESHET.) The positive message is that we should strive for perfection. In many communities, the Zohar is read on a person’s yartzeit. The portion in the Zohar which we read describes the death of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai. It describes him passing away SHALEM whole. SHALEM and SHALOM – peace are from the same root. We pray that the deceased passed away fulfilled his whole being and peace. It’s the antithesis of the generation of the flood, where there was no peace.
It is forbidden to stare at the rainbow because G-d’s presence is in it. However, it is proper to glance at it and recite the blessing, reminding ourselves of the promise that G-d will not to bring destruction despite our sins.

Why is it so Special to Eat Fish Friday Night?

August 20, 2013 Hakarat Hatov No comments

From the lessons of Rabbi Isaac Oelbaum:

Noach worked very hard in the ark, catering to the animals. For one year, he fed and took care of them. When Noach finally came out of the ark and was on dry land, G-d rewarded him and mankind for his devotion and hard work, by giving him the opportunity to eat meat (The George Foreman grill was now on the market!). Until that juncture in time, man was on an exclusive grain diet. How exciting that must have been. The question is asked, as gratitude for taking care of the animals, man had them for supper, however the fish weren’t part of the package. Noach didn’t take care of them. Was he allowed to eat them and if yes, why, and when?

The fish did not partake in the degradation of the world. Therefore, they were led to a certain section of the ocean called Okinus where the waters were bearable and not boiling hot. The reason they were saved is that they were not, in any way, participants of the sin and therefore, they are the symbol of protection against the evil eye. They were under the radar gun, invisible.

So what about eating fish? In many Jewish cultures, fish is a tremendous delicacy that people wait all week for. Interestingly, many commentaries say that Jews were not allowed to eat fish until MATAN TORAH – the receiving of the Torah. G-d rewarded the Jews to eat fish, a gifted species, not blemished by sin on that glorious day of MATAN TORAH. The receiving of the Torah happened to occur on Shabbat. So one should be honored to eat this gift on Friday night. Free from an evil eye, symbol of receiving the Torah – WOW!! It has tremendous spiritual benefits. Try it!!

Everybody is Affected by Everybody

August 20, 2013 Chessed/ Acts of Kindness No comments

 

 

Rabbi Baruch Dopelt who quotes the Bet Halevi.

We learned Noach was a Tzadik in his generation. What would Noach be, though, in comparison to our forefather, Avraham, a generation later? Since Noach’s Generation was so corrupt, maybe his status would have been considered an average Joe. Or, perhaps, he was a tzadik in such a degenerate society, then for sure he would have been angelic in the time of Avraham.

We learn a fundamental concept from the Bet Halevi, that when one sins, it gives KOACH – strength – to the power of evil. It follows, then if one does a good deed, then he strengthens the power of good in the world.

The question is asked, why were the animals destroyed by the flood? Why did they get punished? Did they sin? Animals don’t have freedom of choice; the poor cow. Perhaps, one can say they were no longer necessary once man is gone. They are here, as we know, to serve us, humans.

Rav Yisrael Salantar adds, if someone in Queens is learning Torah, his learning triggers a guy in Paris, France to contemplate whether to keep Shabbat for the first time. In other words, my positive action affects the world for the better, and the opposite is true as well.

The generation of the flood was so corrupt and evil, they were so immersed in sexual misconduct, that even the animals were effected, because the power of evil spreads. The animals’ natural tendencies gravitated to sexual misconduct as well. An Elephant was cross-breeding with a hippopotamus, etc.

Noach, through divine intervention, picked the good animals; the ones that were not so affected in a negative way and congregated them all in the ark. The ark’s purpose was to shut off itself from the rest. A new world was formed in the ark. The KOACH HARAH – the evil powers – were diminished greatly in the ark. This was a new environment. This was a place to fix the damage caused by the generation.

Noach catered to the animals day in and day out. One can say the ultimate form of CHESED – kindness – the exact opposite of the thievery that the world was famous for. They, the rest of the world, practiced that everything belongs to me. Here, Noach was the ultimate giver. Physical relations between the couples were forbidden for twelve months as long as they were in the teiva (ark). This was in contrast to the sexual circus, with no restraints, that was being conducted in the world.

We are a product of our environment; that’s scary stuff. If someone in Honolulu gets depressed, it might be perhaps because a fellow in Brooklyn ate pork. Perhaps, we have to be more intuitive to what’s happening in the world and try to make it a better place because ultimately it affects us.

Parshat Noach

August 20, 2013 Highlights on the Weekly Parsha No comments
First Portion

* They must have been pretty bad, for G-d to say “THAT’S IT, I’VE HAD IT!! I’M DESTROYING THE WORLD!”

* G-d gave Noach 120 years to build the ark to give people a chance to repent and join Him.

* Why is the flood called MAY NOACH – the waters of Noach, the flood of Noach? In other words, why is his name attached to it? It was Noach that G-d empowered the gift and ability to sway others into repentance. Unfortunately, he didn’t step up to the plate. So he takes the responsibility for other’s misdeeds. It’s important to realize that we to have a responsibility for our brethren and not take the deaf-ear New York approach and mind my own business. Some of us have tremendous capabilities and could influence others.

* G-d asked Noach to build the ark himself. Why weren’t others involved? Why didn’t he contract the work to the Mexicans?….cheaper labor. The Torah teaches a very important concept; when someone creates something himself, the creation is an embodiment of himself; his essence, his merits are found in the creation. He was the Tzadik in his generation and G-d found favor in Noach. That favor carries a lot of weight. Maybe now one can understand the controversy, in Israel, many years ago, with playing the music of the composer Wagner, a member of the Nazi German regime. Music is very penetrating and when listening to it, one absorbs the essence, character of the composer. One must be careful listening to some Rock n Roll songs composed by drugged out, suicidal, angry, depressed individuals. Maybe now, one can have a better understanding of copy-caters who mimic what the songs suggests. Another important note, we also find on Pesach; many eat MATZOH-SHMURAH baked by a Jew. There is no soul in machine matzohs.  It is all circuits and wires.  Matzoh has to be made by a Jew, and every Jew has the status of pure kedusha (holiness), no matter what level he is at. Matzoh is such an important commandment; it should be baked by a Jewish soul. Deep down, every Jew has a pure soul.

* Stealing was common; swapping wives was the norm; they would have two wives, one for pleasure…..so what else is new? We see that in our society today. What do you think a mistress does, bake cakes? In addition to what we have mentioned, it would be quite common where they would perform marriages between humans and animals; cross breeding was the norm. That society would crave for any pleasure. There would be no rules, unlimited access.

 

Second Portion

* Noach was 600 years old when entering the ark. He was joined by Na’ama, his wife, and his three sons and their wives.

* Controversy whether Na’ama was the same person, who was the granddaughter of Kayin. Apparently, there are those that say all of mankind stems from the third son of Adam, Shet.

* Na’ama was an innovator, creating voice singing.

* Cham, one of the sons of Noach, breached the law of abstaining from cohabiting in the ark. The Torah hints, relationships were forbidden, by listing men and women separately. Cham’s wife gave birth to the giant Sichon while in the ark. In truth, Sichon had been fathered by Shamchazael (one of the angels who, before the mabul, descended to earth, to live there as human beings.) Cham came to his wife to save her face. For this deed, which was perpetrated in the dark, Cham was repaid measure for measure; he emerged from the ark dark skinned and all his descendants are also black forever.

* Apparently, Noach only entered the ark when the waters were rising. Commentaries say this was the result lack of belief in G-d.

 

Third Portion

* Why did the animals die? They didn’t have freedom of choice to do wrong. (See article)

* Only the fish survived because they had not sinned like the other creatures.

* G-d closed the fountain of the earth and sent a wind to disperse the water. Only three hot fountains continued flowing in memory of the flood. One of them is the well-known hot springs of Tiberias in Israel.

* The raven and the dog were the others who cohabited in the ark.

 

Fourth Portion

*The righteous Noach didn’t emerge from the ark until G-d gave him permission to do so.

*A fundamental change which occurred after the flood was between man and beast. Before the flood, man was promised control over the animals. However, after the flood there was no longer that promise. Instead, the decree was, as long as man is true to his G-dly image, he will not be afraid of them. G-d also put fear of man in animals. Furthermore, as a reward for taking care of the animals, man was given permission to eat them.

 

Fifth Portion

* A rainbow is a covenant that G-d will not destroy the world again. The rainbow didn’t appear in two generations. One of which was the time of Chizkiyahu where the Jewish nation was known to be righteous. So they didn’t need that protection.

 

Sixth portion

* Why was Cham blamed for castrating Noach? It was his son, Cana’an, who actually performed the despicable act. Cham merely told his brothers about his father’s nakedness. Why was he at fault? Apparently it was the way he told his brothers. He told them in a derogatory fashion with the eyes rolling, a giggle, and a sly “hey, look at our drunken father”, while Cana’an heard their conversation from afar. The reaction by Cham triggered Cana’an to look down and lose total respect for his grandfather which permitted him to perform the audacity. Cham paved the way by ridiculing his father and figuratively put the knife in his hand.

 

Seventh Portion

* Why did G-d disperse the unity of the tower of Bavel?  Doesn’t he like unity more than anything? We know they plotted against G-d; however, UNITY IS SPECIAL!! Apparently, it wasn’t a sincere unity. They were united for the sake of the goal, for the sake of the organization. You had to be a company man. One has to sacrifice for the company. If a brick falls, they all mourn. However, if a fellow worker, company man slips, falls and gets killed, apparently, they didn’t care as long as he was replaced efficiently.

Are We the Same Person When We Travel?

August 20, 2013 Jewish Values No comments

 

          How many readers out there like to travel? Some people consider it fun. In fact, the word “vacation” means ‘to vacate one’s premises’. The idea of a vacation is to have a change of pace. A different scenario from our everyday, sometimes, monotonous life could be very therapeutic. When one returns from a vacation he should be refreshed and ready to continue his consistent, habitual existence. But traveling could be a bit overwhelming; packing and unpacking is a chore. One of the best comedy routines (and it was clean) of the famous comedian of the 70’s, George Carlin, was about ‘stuff”, in which the entire meaning of life is to find a place for your stuff. He makes fun of how one goes traveling and is a little frantic taking stuff from one place to another. His reaction plays on our fears of traveling.
          We read in this week’s parasha the detailed description of where our ancestors traveled in the desert. Rabbi Noach Olbaum asks ‘why is it necessary to go through every juncture of their travel routes?” The Torah is not a history book nor is it a GPS. Presumably, there must be a lesson to be learned for the Torah to emphasize their travel itinerary.
          If one thinks about it for a moment, one would realize how difficult it must have been for our ancestors to schlep all their bags, tents, belongings, and let’s not forget, some had small children. Moshe’s instructions to the Israelites were to move immediately when the clouds of glory moved. There was no warning in advance; sometimes they camped at a certain destination for months; sometimes the cloud of glory would move after only two days. It was very unpredictable; this kind of tours would drive anybody nuts.
          Apparently, with all the Israelite’s inconveniences, we do not find any mention in the Torah and the sages, that they complained; there was not one utter of displeasure; that’s incredible! We should be proud of our ancestors for not moaning and groaning and rolling their eyes and screaming ‘again?!’, every time the clouds move.
          The children of Israel showed great restraint and a very strong belief in G-d, and it is no wonder why they’re called the greatest generation that ever lived. We should learn a lesson and be very proud of their tremendous sacrifice of going on the spur of the moment when they were instructed and not losing their cool.
           One of the fates in which our people inevitably fall into is ‘the wandering Jew’. We must be careful with our journeys because sometimes traveling makes us forget who we are. Our values are compromised because we get frantic of our new temporary environment, the new people that we meet and the pressure of constantly watching over our belongings. The schlep can make us develop thin skin and intolerance. It’s important to stop and take a deep breath and focus briefly on our principles. The Torah is trying to teach us to be yourself outside of your home and not to lose sight of what we build as respectable Jews. This is an important lesson that we should learn from this week’s parasha.

Do You Get Angry Often?

August 20, 2013 Jewish Values No comments

          Anger is terrible; anger is horrifying! Our Sages described countless times in our holy scriptures the shortcomings and the consequences suffered by a person who becomes angry or enraged. Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz zt’l believes the most striking and eye-raising effect of anger is that one loses all of ones’ wisdom and spiritual stature, an example we find in this week’s parsha, where Moshe forgot the law as a result of being angry (bamidbar31,14). The Or Hachaim explains that Moshe had known the laws of mourning just minutes before he became angry, and then forgot them. This aspect of the effect of anger is puzzling. We can readily understand how anger affects a person so that after the fact he is of a lesser stature and wisdom then before. But how does anger make one’s previously acquired knowledge disappear? A minute ago he gave over a lesson teaching two plus two equals four, how can he now forget it? How does one lose wisdom which he already possesses?

 

The answer is that the mechanics of Torah wisdom works differently than other wisdoms. Other forms of wisdom do not relate to the personality or character of its possessor. A person may be wicked or obnoxious, and yet retain a storehouse of knowledge and wisdom. Not so with Torah wisdom. Torah is based on character development and it feeds the individual the sensitivity towards others and towards himself, hovering around the person until he internalizes it. Everyone hears the same message, but it doesn’t come through the pipes the same way to each. Apparently, the message received is tailor-made for that individual’s understanding and unique personality.

 

Dr. Goldman, the psychologist of Yeshiva Chafetz Chaim, says a fundamental aspect of life is intellectual growth; however not by feeding a computer. We are not some logical emotionless Vulcan circuit machine, like Mr. Spock, who will solve and rattle off any difficult equations backwards and forwards. Apparently, one should focus more on how to control his emotional nature and to be ready for every situation he’s confronted; this is a sign of strong character. By working on himself, a person’s internal vessel can hold and absorb the Torah with the proper character traits, which he developed through Torah study.

 

However, when there is a flaw in the personality, like anger, it chases away the Torah wisdom and spirituality. A person who becomes unfit to retain Torah, loses it; even the knowledge he already acquired leaves him. It’s not the knowledge itself that is affected but rather the individual that ceases to posses it.

 

Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz says, we can explain this further by drawing a parallel from the acquisition of prophesy to the acquisition of Torah. When Eliyahu, the prophet, ascended to the heavens in a fiery chariot, his disciples came to Elisha (who was very close to Eliyahu) and suggested that they search for the missing Eliyahu. Rashi (one of the mainstream commentaries) asks, ‘is it possible that these same prophets, who had foretold that Eliyahu would be taken, would forget as to his whereabouts? This teaches us that from the day Eliyahu was taken, spirituality left them. Rashi asks how did they forget that which they already knew? The answer is, a person must be a prophet in order to know these things. If he falls in stature, he no longer knows these facts of which he was aware only yesterday.

 

This is true of prophecy and it is true of Torah as well. It is the knowledge that must be integrated into itself into a person. But if a character becomes blemished, his Torah will vanish as well.

Man’s Word Should Be As Good As Gold

August 20, 2013 The Gift of Speech No comments

This article was constructed with the help of Dr. Robert Goldman-Psychologist at Yeshiva Chafetz Chaim and Rabbi Yitzchak Aminov   
Guy is driving in suburban Jerusalem when he sees a sign: “talking dog for sale”. “WOW!” he says “I gotta see this!”
The man rings the bell. The owner directs the man to the back yard where the dog is lounging, sipping on a pina colada.
The man asks, “so you can talk?” The dog answers “yep.” “So tell me your story” the man asks. The dog answers “well, I discovered I can talk when I was very young and I wanted to use my abilities to help others out. So I informed the Mosaad agency (Israeli intelligence) about my gift. I was working in no time. I was sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders and suspected terrorists. Because No one realized a dog can eavesdrop, I was one of their most valuable agents for eight years.
However it was exhausting work; it really tired me out. I knew I wasn’t getting any younger and wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a less stressful job at Ben-Gurian Airport to do some under cover security work. I was wondering near suspicious characters and listening in. During this period of time I got married and had a mess of puppies, so now I’m just retired.”
Guy was amazed!!
He asked the owner how much he wants for the dog.
The answer was $10.
The man was astonished “why so cheap?”
The owner answers back, “the dog is a liar; he never worked for the Mossad.”

We should ask ourselves, are we careful when we speak to people?
How many of us really keep our word?
How many of us will grow big noses if the Pinocchio concept holds truth?
This week one of the subjects discussed in the parshiot are vows.
Perhaps it will be interesting to explore the reasons why man makes vows. And more importantly, how will he be able to keep his vows.
If one only knew the importance of keeping a vow he would be a little more careful.
We all learned about the famous dream that our forefather Yaakov had. There were a set of Angels going up and a set of Angels were going down a later. When he woke up he realized the importance of the place he was in and that G-d is sending him a message. Yaakov responded by telling G-d “I will do your will but please protect and sustain me. Then I will make a covenant on this very ground”.
Many years past and Yaakov weathered many storms. He survived his dangerous brother, Eisav, who hated him and survived the evil Lavan, his father in law. Yaakov entered the land of Israel and settled there for a while. He even passed “the place”; however no covenant was made.
Yaakov’s quite and tranquil time ended abruptly where he encountered the rape of his daughter, Dina, and the disappearance of his son, Yosef. Our sages tell us this was due partially because he didn’t keep his word and make the covenant. G-d had to give Yaakov a reminder; HELLO!! And order him to make the covenant.
How can our forefather, Yaakov forget?
Many people who make vows mean well and intend to keep them. However situations change and many find it difficult to keep.
Let us examine what transpires when a person makes a vow and what occurs after that one has a change of heart.
There was a man by the name of Palti ben Laish who was forced to marry the beautiful Michal, King Shaul’s daughter. One may say this is a dream come true, to marry the King of Israel’s daughter; he’s set for life. However, there was an underlying problem; the King tried to annul Michal’s first marriage to one named David ben Ishai whom Shaul despised.
The first marriage was valid, nevertheless the king decreed she is no longer married to David. Now, who has the nerve to argue with the king?
What is Palti to do?
SHE’S A MARRIED WOMAN!!
The punishment is Sevier.
When Palti and Michal came to their honeymoon suite, Palti did something profound. He stuck his sword right in the middle of the bed and proclaimed “I do not touch a married woman!! No one shall remove it!!”
Rav Chaim Shmulevitz asks, “that’s beautiful, hey, a dramatic pause please!! Nevertheless when time passes and the couple warms up to each other, do you really think a dead idle sword will stand in the way of PASSION?!
Rav Chaim answers, “he stuck the sword there purposely. It will always remind him of the definitive strong emotions he had when stating, without a doubt, she is forbidden!! SHE IS NOT HIS!! And that reminder will enable him to stop.
Dr. Goldman points out when one makes a vow, at that moment, he’s enthusiastic and emotionally exited about making the statement. However as time goes on, chances are the enthusiasm will decrease. It is not the same. Therefore the absent of the feeling causes him to be forgetful or think it’s difficult to keep.
Rav Aminov says a person can go to a Rav and annul his vow petach atara on the grounds that it is too difficult. However, one should know swearing and making vows, especially using G-d’s name should not be taken lightly; it’s a stringent Torah law.
There was an outcast warrior among the Jews by the name of Yiftach. The Jews had no choice but to choose him. He was their only chance to win the war.
When the Jews were victorious Yiftach said something foolishly. In his enthusiasm and love for G-d, he vowed “the first thing that comes out of my house I will sacrifice to HAKADOSH-BARUCH-HUE. Of course he had in mine an ox or a sheep. However, this Cinderrella story took a different and nasty turn. When he returned from the battlefield, his daughter came out. Unfortunately, Yiftach took his vows pretty seriously and fully intended to take his daughter to the slaughter.
Yiftach could have annulled the vow, but instead he rationalized it was beneath his dignity to go to the high priest, Pinchas to ask for the annulment. His ego failed his daughter; so much for priorities. Apparently she did not die however she was considered HEKDESH-changed status therefore not permitted to marry. She withered away like an old maid.
We see from the Torah that vows were taken very seriously. Yosef went through painstaking efforts to honor his father’s request to be buried in Israel. Before leaving Egypt, Moshe, the leader of the Israelites searched through all of Egypt to find Yosef’s bones to be transferred to the promised land.
Astonishingly the sea split when it saw Yossef’s bones. The reason was because of Yossef’s merits, though also, because of Moshe’s ability to keep a vow.
Vows were meant to make us better human beings. However sometimes it seems like one takes upon himself too much. We read in our evening prayer “take away the Satan (evil inclination) from before us and from behind us.” It makes sense that the satan is in front of us; He puts many enticing thing in front of our eyes. But what is meant by the satan enticing us from behind?
The Sages answer that he comes up behind us and pushes us forward and says “hey, you can do it; you’re ready”. The problem is, you’re really not ready yet. This is perhaps dangerous because if one stumbles and falls he might have a very hard time getting up. Sometimes one never can recover.
So a man makes a vow to improve his status as a Jew, as a human being. However, at times, due to the evil inclination he over-reacts because of his enthusiasm.
I find the joke about the talking dog a bit humorous. When I read it a second time it occurred to me, that even though it’s just a joke, the dog’s value plummeted because he lied. The same goes for mankind; a person’s value decreases if one doesn’t keep his word. It’s an important lesson everyone should take to heart and be sensitive to, including yours truly.
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