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Parshat Re’eh

May 9, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Re’eh

August 25, 2011
25 Av, 5771

Dear Friends,

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In This Issue

Parshat Re’eh – Hard To Find Good Neighbors?

A Man With No Country

Kosher Alert

Parshat Re’eh – Hard To Find Good Neighbors?

In this week’s Parsha (Parshat Re’eh), (13:29-31), G-d warns the Jewish nation that when they will conquer the land, there is cause for concern that their ideology and everything good they built will be threatened. This is because of the temptation to follow the ways of your non-Jewish neighbors. Apparently, we learn from here that neighbors should not be taken lightly. They have a tremendous impact on us. Ahh, but one can say, I don’t go out partying with him; he’s not part of my chevra (group of exclusive buddies). However, a neighbor is always there and it’s hard not to bump into. One may inadvertently walk home together after temple on Shabbat. His wife may borrow a cup of sugar. One may have a quick pick-up game of two on two or even one-on-one in his driveway garage basketball game, since one is too lazy to go to the friend of choice, who is a little further away. The constant contact, the Baal Haturim in his commentary to Pirkei Avot says, forces the unavoidable influence. He goes so far to say that a neighbor has more influence than a good friend.

Rabbi Baruch Doppelt quotes Rashi (one of the mainstream commentaries on the Chumash) and says the reason Korach was able to influence Dassan and Aviram of his rebellious plan against Moshe in the desert by joining him was because they were neighbors. They absolutely had nothing to gain by this argument. It wasn’t their fight!! Dassan and Aviram lent a sympathetic ear to Korach after he had a hard day at the office. Before one knows it, you’re being dragged into battling a war that one doesn’t know how he got involved. Eventually they were all killed, both Korach and Dassan and Aviram, as the ground swallowed them up.

The same holds true with good neighbors. The tribes of Yehuda and Yissachar were known as tremendous talmidei chachamim (well-versed in Torah knowledge) because they all lived next to Moshe who had enormous Torah knowledge and dedication toward G-d. Apparently Moshe had made an impact on the neighboring tribes.

This neighborly influence has an effect on a broader scale. One adopts the culture and way of life of where he lives. This is evident by seeing Jews from different backgrounds taking up residence in their new country, America. Each one of these Jewish groups were influenced greatly by their neighboring Goyim (non-Jews).

One may joke of the humor of the popular scenario where a man is looking out of his window with binoculars while complaining to his wife about what the new neighbors are doing. ‘They’re so different then us ‘; one doesn’t realize but eventually not only will he get used to their differences, but start copying what they do. We don’t have much of a choice when new neighbors move in. However, when one is planning to move, he should first find out who is living next door. This should be on top of his list.

There was a slogan ad by State Farm Insurance many years ago; ‘And like a good neighbor State Farm is there’. Neighbors apparently are held in such high esteem that they are labeled as ‘always there for you’. Yes, they are there and influential.

A Man With No Country

I often feel I’m not understood; does that sound familiar? But wait; seriously, there is a feeling of uniqueness among us. We’re a certain kind, and therefore one cannot hold it against us for not complying with any particular culture. Who is ‘my kind’ one may ask? Who is ‘us’? Well, let’s start from the united nation type background. My grandparents were Bukharian. Although both my parents were born there, they moved to Israel as children and consider themselves Israelis and I was born in the States, to be more precise, Boro Park. Like many of my kind, we moved to Queens and lived as a close-knit very small community. Most of us had a strong influential American Ashkenaz schooling through Yeshiva. I remember some of the kids in the class would ask us “what’s your background”, and we would answer “Bukharian.” They would look at us strangely and ask, “Where’s that?” They had no clue. If we would have answered ‘its part of Texas’, they would have believed us and truth be told, if it were convincing enough, we too would believe it as well.

We’re not considered Ashkenaz American; they’ll be the first to testify to that. We’re not rough and tough enough to be Israeli. My mother-in-law always asks me “why didn’t you marry your own kind?” (My wife is born and bred in Bukharah). So if we are not any of the above….SO WHAT ARE WE???…ARE WE FROM MARS??!!

I’ve tried to bond with different cultures but I never really felt comfortable with any of them. It wasn’t home, and when I asked my fellow ‘men without countrieans’ (name created by fellow member Rafi Sharbat); they had the similar feeling.

Although there are advantages, Ofir Haimoff (one of the clubmembers) said we could appreciate every culture to the fullest whether it’s chulent or osevoh, (different Shabbat tables) understanding jokes and sarcasms or different music. We know what good things a particular culture has to offer and appreciate them like they do; ‘Men with-out countriean’ could fluctuate between cultures as easy as changing hats. One can go to different synagogues being aware how the service is ran and even lead it (hazan) and not feel awkward; the convenience of having a choice of more synagogues and the ability to tolerate certaincuisines in ‘high pressured-no time New York’ is a big plus. People, who are not like us, go to a Temple that’s not of their kind and feel like lost puppies. Another club member says I feel I’m not committed to anything; I’m a free bird. There is no pressure of ‘having to follow the Jones’. However – and trust it’s a big however – we’ll never feel at home anywhere.

Last year I gave a lecture on this topic and it was such a hit. I received so many responses. Someone stopped me in the street and said ‘I can really relate, we’re unique.’ The ironic thing is the person who approached me was Bukharian who came here from the Soviet Union when he was fifteen. If you think about it, there are 30,000 people with a similar background. If we had four Bukharians in our eighth grade class we felt important. He has an entire city just like him, how can he relate?! How absurd is that!!

Presumably, the reason many people feel a sense of not belonging, a feeling of seclusion, unable to express ourselves resulting in stifling our emotions and feeling too uncomfortable to disclose our inner thoughts, is because there is no common denominator. What do you mean, one may ask? I believe I found the answer.

I have a friend (Boaz Davidoff, fellow member) who made Aliya (moved to Israel) about ten years ago. The reason is because it is our Jewish homeland. He said ‘it was very difficult to make the adjustment in the beginning and I was very homesick. I still can’t swallow some of the characters and how the country is ran. However, surprisingly, I could get into an argument in the street with a stranger (which as an American I always made fun of) about politics, security, economics and religious issues very easily because I care. It’s my country. Yes, that’s correct, it’s my country; it’s the Jewish homeland; the land of my Fathers. I was never able to say that about Queens, New York, although, I grew up there. But the feeling I have for Israel is deeply rooted. I feel this is my home and all of us living here have a commitment to make this country flourish and work correctly. This is the common denominator we have.’

We read in birkat hamazon ‘thank you for giving us the good land’ our land, a land we can call home, which we can go especially for our fellow ‘men without countrieans.

Kosher Alert

A good friend who happens to be in the catering business for a long time, Gershon Meirov (from the famous catering Meirov family) made me aware of something interesting this past week. The Chicago Rabbinical Council is taking the lead in this area and holding a conference on the topic of exotic kosher animals. The Torah draws the guidelines of what is kosher and what’s not, and we have a Mesorah (tradition) how to use those guidelines in helping us to determine what’s acceptable to eat and not. There are the classic meats that our ancestors have eaten traditionally (among those: chicken, sheep, lamb) but the list changed with the introduction of animals which were unknown due to coming to the new world (America).

The classic example is turkey, a virtually unknown species that was introduced in Europe in the 16th century to the elite, but popularized later in the United States. The leading Rabbinical authorities in America at the time determined through the kosher guidelines standards, that it was permissible for consumption. There is no Mesorah of our ancestors eating turkey. But that doesn’t mean it’s not kosher.

A number of meats that are on the agenda at the conference are elk and quail. Another kosher animal that up until recently was never commercially available was buffalo (some buffalo are controversial), although it is a bit pricey. But for those who like the lean meat, it’s something to look into. There are other exotic animals that are being examined for kashrut. Jewish organizations like CRC and the OU to name a few, are exploring the new age of kashrut and would like to increase the menu beyond pastrami and corn beef. As long as it passes the traditional guidelines of Kashrut, we’re good to go. Thanks Gersh.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Va’etchanan

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Va’etchanan

August 11, 2011
11 Av, 5771

Dear Friends,

In appreciation to the staff of The Afikim Foundation for all their help, and to Torahanytime.com for giving us the mic.

Please print out this newsletter and say over a great D’var Torah at the Friday night Shabbos table.

Please forward to a friend and be a partner in spreading Torah.

Dedicate a newsletter, shuir and a CD in memory of a loved one.

In This Issue

Is Fear Good or Bad? – Parshat Va’etchanan

Road Rage

Is There a Problem With Eating Fish and Cheese Together?

Is Fear Good or Bad? – Parshat Va’etchanan

In this week’s parsha, similar to many in the book of Devarim, Moshe reflects on some important points in the first forty years of a young nation. He reviews some of the triumphs, shortcomings, and the encounters, which the Israelites experienced in the desert. One of the encounters was the evil Idol worship Ba’al Peor.

In our previous discussions (Balak newsletter), we mentioned that in order to participate in worshiping this idol, one has to relieve himself in front of the idol. The reasoning behind this despicable act is to rebel against the values of society (idol worship was mainstream) and to destroy any form of order in which G-d and mankind has to offer.

Apparently, the Ba’al Peor inception initially was an entirely different philosophy than the popular anti-establishment defiant act, worship or however one wants to describe it. The original idea was to feel so fearful in front of Ba’al Peor, to the extent, that one loses all control of his bowels. Apparently, when human beings are afraid of something they have an urge to relieve themselves. Ever wonder why one has to go after being scared or experiencing anxieties? The philosophy of most pagenistic societies, in that period of time, was of ‘angry G-ds had to be appeased’ and that society is afraid of them; by losing control of ones’ bowels one has served their G-d well.

One has to wonder what the Torah perspective of fear is. Is fear good? The Torah commands us to fear G-d. Is fear bad (fear of life)?

Dr. Goldman, psychologist at Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim, mentions the Torah requires us to be afraid only of G-d (and to a certain extent, parents and teachers). He points out that perhaps by fearing only G-d, it can have a tremendous benefit on us. ‘You see’ he says, ‘One can be a lot more assertive in his everyday life with this mindset; it will, in effect, make it easier to reach goals otherwise unattainable because of broadening fear to man. He will not be timid and tremble in front of people; he will be able to make oral presentations to his corporate bigwigs at work with ease because he knows that everything comes from G d; Hakadosh Baruch Hu is responsible; I fear only Him and not the grouchy boss or hot-tempered moody neighbor’. Man is just the messenger of G-d; the dog bites the stick when being hit, not realizing it’s the master who is the one who is inflicting the beating; so don’t be scared of the bully.

Apparently, it seems like the original Ba’al Peor worshipers had a certain pleasure in getting scared out of their wits. Seemingly, this falls in perfectly with today’s society; remember the popularity of Freddy Krueger and the Friday the 13th series, Frankenstein, Boris Karloff (no, he’s not Bukharian), and Hannibal Lector? Why do some people enjoy fear? Dr. Neil Levey says society is bored with their mundane life ‘so they flirt with fear’. So maybe that’s one reason why Peor was so popular.

Basically, our sages teach us to channel the fear to the Al-Mighty but one may ask ‘how can one reach a level of fearing G-d?’ Dr. Goldman continues, ‘It’s important to establish a relationship with Him through prayer and share with Him your happy news as well as your fears.’ By focusing on prayer and conveying every aspect of your life, it will strengthen the bond between G-d and yourself and will develop feelings such as fear, love, awe, and respect. Even though one might think it’s one-sided at first, he should still try it, and one will be surprised at the outcome. Unfortunately, prayer today for many, has become monotonic lip service, so one has to make it more meaningful.

Rabbi Baruch Dopelt is bothered by a pasuk, ‘serve G-d with happiness and fear’; it seems to contradict each other. Perhaps this famous pasuk will shed some light (we all know the song) ‘oseh shalom bimromav…if He (G-d) can make peace in the heavens (between fire and water), surely He too will make peace between us….’. The question is asked, how can you make peace between fire and water, two opposites? The answer is in the heavens. There is only olam ha’emet (world of truth) and both fire and water recognize and fear G-d to the highest degree because they see the truth without distortion; they’re able to co-exist. We too have to explore our inner self and find the truth without any distortion and we’ll develop a true fear exclusively for G-d.

Road Rage

One morning earlier this week, while I was driving, a speeding vehicle buzzed past my car and the driver screamed, ‘Jew!!’ It was unexpected, so I jumped. Obviously, the driver’s intention was to purely shock and agitate me, and he accomplished his mission. What was surprising about the incident was my reaction. Instinctively, I was about to press on the acceleration pedal and ram my old jalopy 1996 Toyota Camry into him. Those brief moments were filled with startled surprise to anger (how dare you!!). Seconds later, I came to my senses realizing I have a kippa on my head and I have to live up to a certain dignified standard. Also, why would I want this low-life in my life for any extended period; the few seconds that he was in view was enough. I hope with G-d’s help to never see him again. Lastly, I have a busy life as is, so I don’t need the headaches.

But to think the most scariest and disappointing notion is that for those few seconds, I was tempted to violently react in the most horrific way. For those brief moments, I was not in control. I can’t help but think that if the scenario was slightly different and he would have agitated me a bit longer or if I had a rough morning before, would I have acted on those initial impulses?

Understandably, a kippa reminds oneself about the pride and control that we must adhere to. After all, this is one of the primary lessons we learn in Yeshiva – control. However, what about protecting our pride and the pride of our people? Should we just be a bunch of wimps and not react?

We asked Dr. Goldman, Psychologist at Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim, on how does he explain road rage. He says we first have to understand what makes us so defensive and tempted to react. The Doctor explains that the anger reaction stems from pride; the ego has been hurt. We have to learn from King David; when David ran away, Shimi ben Gera insulted him and he did not react right away. David didn’t allow road rage to take the better of him. This is a person who was able to control himself for this moment. He didn’t give an immediate irrational response. Apparently, it was very difficult for him to control himself, but he nevertheless did.

The Zohar mentions that King David had similar desires (yetzer hara) as did Eisav (Jacob’s brother and rival). Therefore, the sages compare them; both had tendencies to spill blood, they both pursued married women. They both were redheads and presumably had tempers, and both were leaders. The primary difference between them however, and what the Torah emphasizes is CONTROL.

Dr. Goldman mentions one has to believe and say ‘I can take these insults; I’m okay, I’m not less of a person than I was before the insults’. It would be a sign of insecurity if one would let it get to him. Ah, but the kids are watching as I’m being insulted, I shouldn’t react? The good doctor says one should handle the insults with dignity, then the kids will respect you. You’re not a baby, don’t let it bother you. If they see that you are not bothered and affected by those insults, they will respect you more. The notion of the ‘American cowboy’, I’ll take care of him at the ‘OK Carrel’ is nonsense. One has to understand, one can lose everything in one moment. Is it worth it?

This past year, there were 1200 injuries and 300 serious injuries; some of which fatalities cases of road rage. Apparently, it’s a cause for concern because the numbers are rising yearly; although, tempers and egos might be difficult to contain at a split second notice. Rav Yitzhak Aminov quotes Rav Yisroel Salanter who teaches us to review daily Mussar books (Jewish self-help books) on chapters pertaining to the character traits that you believe you’re weak in. One would be surprised what the sub-conscious mind absorbs; it just might save your life. One of the most famous quotes pertaining to road rage is ‘you never learn how to swear until you learn to drive’.

Is There a Problem With Eating Fish and Cheese Together?

One morning many years ago, I was at a catered affair of a Brit Milah (circumcision of an 8 day old boy). I was about to sink my teeth into a delicious bagel with lox and cream cheese, which I prepared with some tremendous effort, when someone approached me and said ‘you’re not allowed to have cheese and fish together according to Jewish law’. I retorted back, saying, “I never heard of such a law’ and proceeded to have my sandwich. A little while after the incident, I came across others who also did not eat the two together. Over the last number of years, I heard many contradicting reports on the subject. I think it would be a good idea to clarify a few points on this topic before we disregard the melted cheese on the flounder.

Surprisingly, even our brothers who come from Ashkenazi countries have an issue with eating the two together. But apparently, there is some good news for those Parmesan baked tilapia fans. Well maybe, that depends on a few things.

Rabbi Yossef Cairo, the author of the Shulchan Aruch (main body of Jewish law), whom the Sephardim follow, writes that one should not eat fish and cheese together. However the Rama whom the Ashkenazim follow not only disagrees but claims that the Mechaber (the author as Rabbi Cairo is called) made a printing mistake and didn’t mean fish and cheese but meant fish and “meat”. He says it’s impossible that the Mechaber would say such a thing; it’s not logical. This is the source of the controversy. Although there are many Sephardic lawmakers who agree with the Rama; however there are those who hold by the text and will not combine. Some even say there is a health hazard eating fish and cheese together. Rabbi Eliyahu Ben Haim disagrees and says it’s perfectly okay and the health hazard does not apply today.

One should hold by their family tradition customs, if your ancestors did not eat then you should not do so either and if they did then enjoy the tuna melt. If one does not have any tradition, then follow your Rabbi. But there are definitely very good sources to be lenient.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Devarim

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Devarim

August 5, 2011
5 Av, 5771

Dear Friends,

In appreciation to the staff of The Afikim Foundation for all their help, and to Torahanytime.com for giving us the mic.

Tisha B’Av begins this Monday Night

In This Issue

Power of Speech – Parshat Devarim

Light At the End of the Tunnel – Tisha B’Av

Coffee Withdrawal

Power of Speech – Parshat Devarim

‘These are the words that Moshe spoke to Israel’….The word ‘Devarim’ which is the name of the last of the five books of the Torah (bible) is defined here as ‘words’. Many commentaries including the Vilna Gaon say that the first four books were heard directly from the mouth of G-d through the throat of Moshe. However, in the fifth book, Moshe was the speaker. Although he received divine prophecy, nevertheless, Moshe chose his own words and conveyed the commandments to the Israelites as he understood them. The importance of calling this book Devarim, which literal translation means ‘things’, conveys the power of speech. It is no coincidence in the Hebrew language that Davar (thing) and Deeber (speak) are spelled and sound similarly. G-d created the world by using verbal expression ‘and G-d called the day….’and G-d called the earth….’ so we see that words are the root of things. We too have the capability to create things with words.

A powerful unique gift in which Jews possess is speech; we learn this message from what our forefather Yitzchak prophesized, ‘the hands are the hands of Esav but the voice is Yaakov.’ The commentaries say we can control the world and our destiny by using our speech wisely in accordance with the Torah. This is our weapon; it’s a tool to fix life and the ticket to heaven.

However, we see from past history, the Egyptians were aware of this trait and neutralized it as they enslaved us. They cleverly knew how to psychologically take the wind out of the Israelites by working them till exhaustion. ‘The Jews moaned and screamed’ and could not verbalize their feelings. This was a designed plan to rob them of expression, their power source.

We learn this lesson from another important incident where we find that Moshe was afraid to go to battle with Israel’s nemesis, Ogg the giant. Apparently, many years before, Ogg had told Abraham that his nephew Lot, was being held captive and it’s important to go to battle and save him. One might think it was quite a noble gesture of Ogg. However, Ogg had ulterior motives; he had hoped that Abraham would die in battle so he can then marry Abraham’s wife Sarah, who happened to be one of the four most beautiful women that ever lived. Why then was Moshe afraid of Ogg? We see clearly that he had malicious intent! Moshe realized that although Ogg wanted Sarah, nevertheless, he used verbal expression by alarming Abraham about the condition of Lot his nephew. While Moshe missed out the great opportunity to sanctify G-d through verbal expressions by hitting the rock as opposed to speaking to it as G-d commanded, apparently, Moshe was afraid the scale might be tipped the favoring Ogg because utilized his power of speech and Moshe – in that case – did not.

We find many leaders in history who were able to push their agendas by their powerful orating skills. The world was almost destroyed by the evil Hitler (y’mach shemo); this was made possible by him hypnotizing the crowd through his speeches. There were many fine skills that John F Kennedy had as a politician; one of them was that he was able to win over Americans through his press conferences with his sharp humor. There’s a saying, ‘It’s not the mighty hand but the powerful tongue.’ There’s a lot of truth to those words.

Lastly, the greatest gift one can give a deceased relative is to say kaddish (yitgadal v’yitkadash shemeh rabah) or to learn Torah in his memory. The soul can move further up towards a better place in heaven by a mere kaddish. Again, we see how powerful and meaningful words can be.

We can create and destroy worlds in an instant through our speech. If we only realize and give some thought of how powerful our speech can be, we would be a little more careful in watching our tongue, and hesitate just a little before those powerful words come out.

Light At the End of the Tunnel – Tisha B’Av

This coming Tuesday is Tisha B’Av (the ninth day of the Hebrew month of Av). It’s a tragic day for Jews; many terrible tragedies have happened to our people on this day. The most endearing loss is our temples. For three weeks leading up to this tragic day, we do not make or attend any celebrations, listen to music or go swimming. We gradually increase our mourning beginning on Rosh Chodesh (1st day of the month of Av) by not shaving, doing laundry, haircuts, and eating meat or chicken. On Tisha B’Av itself which starts this Monday night, we fast, do not wear leather shoes or sit on chairs (at about mid-day one can start sitting on regular chairs). Apparently our ancestors have not lived up to G-d’s expectations and occasionally angered Him. This was magnified on Tisha B’Av. Maybe we should just leave it at that for now and not dig up any skeletons that are in the closet (or check out my lecture called ‘baseless hatred’). One of the most interesting and moving gemara’s in which I’ve seen on Tisha B’Av and would like to share with you, was a story involving Rabbi Akiva. A number of Rabbis were observing the destruction of the temple noticing foxes running in and out of the Holy of Holies. This is where the high priest would enter on Yom Kippur to pray and plead for forgiveness for the nation of Israel.The high priest’s life would be taken away in the Holy of Holies if the nation was not forgiven. It was such a high energy and spiritual place that if any unauthorized person entered with the exception of the Kohen Gadol, he would be killed.

The degradation of the condition of the Holy of Holies made the rabbis very sad with the exception of Rabbi Akiva who was laughing with joy. His colleagues were puzzled and asked him to explain his behavior. Rabbi Akiva responded to their question of why are you laughing, with ‘why are you crying’? “Apparently,” he said, “I had a prophecy where the temple will be destroyed and the final redemption will come, and the ultimate temple will be built. Now that I saw the destruction I realized that my prophecy is coming true and the Moshiach will come and our people will be victorious in our quest to build the 3rd and final house of G-d”.

Although I can relate very much to the sadness that the Rabbis expressed to Rabbi Akiva, I felt that Rabbi Akiva’s attitude towards the negativity surrounding him was very impressive. While everybody was deep in sorrow, he tried to find something positive; he tried to find the light at the end of the tunnel. The frame of mind in which Rabbi Akiva expressed is not simple to achieve. It is difficult to be consistent in thinking the glass is half full. However, in today’s day and age, it’s a must in order to survive. A positive outlook breeds positive feelings. If the Jews had this attitude at the time of the destruction, then G-d would never have brought this bad omen. Apparently, if one posseses a positive frame of mind like Rabbi Akiva, then he will feel more positive toward his friend. The tolerance level toward people would be higher and that would lead to tranquility. We should learn a lesson from Rabbi Akiva’s positive attitude and incorporate it in every step of our lives. We should think positive which would lead to feeling positive. It will result in us feeling good about ourselves and others, and we should hope and pray that Moshiach will come and the final temple will be built be’karov.

Coffee Withdrawal

Personally, one of the scariest times of the year are the two of the six fasts that we keep – Yom Kippur and Tisha B’Av. You see, I’m a coffee addict and I have to stop drinking coffee a week before the fast and wean myself from it to prevent caffeine withdrawal headaches, which occur on the fast day. (With some people, if they fast without getting their daily dose of caffeine, in other words they stop cold turkey, then the symptoms get so severe that they experience excruciating headaches to an extent leading to nausea.)

We are all trying to observe G-d’s commandment, but how can we stop the painful experience?

I’m sure you are probably wondering, what about the other four fasts and how do I handle the headaches? You see, those fasts start at daybreak and not the night before. Therefore, one would get up before daybreak and guzzle down three cups of coffee. But the two remaining fasts which begin the night before, are problematic.

A week before the fast, I try to wean myself from coffee, decreasing it daily until I’m caffeine-free a day or two before. Unfortunately, the headaches are prolonged that week; however not as severe.

There is always a price to pay for something good. However, this addict (myself) is a fighter and is trying to find various ways to not interrupt the addiction, while at the same time, observe the mitzvah of fasting. Perhaps Excedrin might be a solution; it has caffeine in it. But the Rabbis say it’s problematic taking it on a fast day. I have heard of time-release capsules or laxatives. Excitingly, I asked a pharmacist who did not hear of such a thing on the market. He mentioned it could be compounded, but he doesn’t recommend it, sighting coffee is a potent laxative and could cause uncontrolled accidents throughout the day if taken. Plus, there is a health risk, potentially affecting the heart.

I love the taste of coffee and find it hard to depart from it. Breakfast and coffee is a marriage made in heaven. Doughnuts are not fun without it; neither is a bagel. Plus, it keeps a person awake. I tend to sleep very late and get up very early. Without the coffee infusion, sleep catches up with you; it interrupts a person’s very busy schedule.

If you only knew what us addicts have to go through to fast, I’m sure there is a great reward awaiting us in heavens (probably the best cup of coffee you ever tasted.)

I would like to end by asking, is there is anyone out there that has a solution? This addict would like to know.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Masei

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Masei

July 28, 2011
26 Tammuz, 5771

Dear Friends,

In appreciation to the staff of The Afikim Foundation for all their help, and to Torahanytime.com for giving us the mic.

In This Issue

How Do You Like to Travel?

Blessings for a Newly Married Couple

Breakfast Cereals: Shredded Wheat & Granola (Parts 5 & 6 of the 6 Categories)

How Do You Like to Travel?

How many readers out there like to travel? Some people consider it fun. In fact, the word “vacation” means ‘to vacate one’s premises’. The idea of a vacation is to have a change of pace. A different scenario from our everyday, sometimes, monotonous life could be very therapeutic. When one returns from a vacation he should be refreshed and ready to continue his consistent, habitual existence. But traveling could be a bit overwhelming; packing and unpacking is a chore. One of the best comedy routines (and it was clean) of the famous comedian of the 70’s, George Carlin, was about ‘stuff”, in which the entire meaning of life is to find a place for your stuff. He makes fun of how one goes traveling and is a little frantic taking stuff from one place to another. His reaction plays on our fears of traveling.

We read in this week’s parasha the detailed description of where our ancestors traveled in the desert. Rabbi Noach Olbaum asks ‘why is it necessary to go through every juncture of their travel routes?” The Torah is not a history book nor is it a GPS. Presumably, there must be a lesson to be learned for the Torah to emphasize their travel itinerary.

If one thinks about it for a moment, one would realize how difficult it must have been for our ancestors to schlep all their bags, tents, belongings, and let’s not forget, some had small children. Moshe’s instructions to the Israelites were to move immediately when the clouds of glory moved. There was no warning in advance; sometimes they camped at a certain destination for months; sometimes the cloud of glory would move after only two days. It was very unpredictable; this kind of tours would drive anybody nuts.

Apparently, with all the Israelite’s inconveniences, we do not find any mention in the Torah and the sages, that they complained; there was not one utter of displeasure; that’s incredible! We should be proud of our ancestors for not moaning and groaning and rolling their eyes and screaming ‘again?!’, every time the clouds move.

The children of Israel showed great restraint and a very strong belief in G-d, and it is no wonder why they’re called the greatest generation that ever lived. We should learn a lesson and be very proud of their tremendous sacrifice of going on the spur of the moment when they were instructed and not losing their cool.

One of the fates in which our people inevitably fall into is ‘the wandering Jew’. We must be careful with our journeys because sometimes traveling makes us forget who we are. Our values are compromised because we get frantic of our new temporary environment, the new people that we meet and the pressure of constantly watching over our belongings. The schlep can make us develop thin skin and intolerance. It’s important to stop and take a deep breath and focus briefly on our principles. The Torah is trying to teach us to be yourself outside of your home and not to lose sight of what we build as respectable Jews. This is an important lesson that we should learn from this week’s parasha.

Blessings for a Newly Married Couple

When a couple marries, they are treated like royalty for seven days. They are not permitted to work, and friends and family throw a festive meal daily in their honor for a week. When my wife and I were a chatan and kallah, we felt it was a lot of fun having parties thrown on our behalf. This is very different than western culture where couples go on their honeymoon right after the wedding. However, more and more couples are realizing the importance of shevah brachot and schedule the honeymoon for a later date. If one is sensitive enough, he’ll realize that Jews like to make many brachot. In fact, they have a blessing for almost everything. The Zohar teaches us never to be skimpy on brachot. When one recites a blessing and an angel in the heavens says amen, it’s as good as gold.

There is a concept in our Torah where the inception or the beginning of something is the most crucial, most pleasurable and most potent; the first few seconds of smelling a nice odor is powerful, then it loses its scent. Similarly, taste and feel also have the same powerful beginning affect. Perhaps that is why when one wants to understand himself or others, they explore his or their childhood. Many things we like and don’t like results from childhood experiences. Marriage is the same way. We shower the chatan and kallah with brachot in the beginning of their marriage, hoping the positive vibe will turn to actuality.

In sheva brachot (seven blessings), the chatan and kallah sit in the front table similar to a king and queen. They are the focus of the meal and it’s an obligation on the guests, similar to the wedding night, to make the couple happy. At the end of the meal, after birkat hamazon (grace after meal), the seven brachot are recited.

There is an interesting scenario when the last day of sheva brachot (seventh day) falls on Shabbat, and seuda shleshit (the afternoon meal) is the chosen meal for the festivities. Although it seems like an optimal time to celebrate, problems could arise. Meals can be alarmingly long. Of course everyone wants to say a few words on behalf of the couple, his relatives, her relatives, and some in between. (Since it is Shabbat and no one is driving, it’s safe to have a little extra Vodka or Scotch!) Singing is a must, especially as a tribute to the chatan and kallah. Before you know it, it is already nighttime.

Do we still have the Mitzvah (commandment) to say sheva brachot after dark? One has to understand in Jewish law, the day starts at night. Therefore, do we say a new day (yom rishon) had begun already and we missed the opportunity for the ceremony or however we go by the ruling that if one did not finish the meal, one can prolong the Shabbat well into the night (which is the next day) and therefore the last day of sheva brachot is also extended?

Presumably one might think you can, because we frequently prolong the Shabbat, but Rabbi Eliyahu ben Haim, as well as Rabbi Itzhak Aminov site a source (Rebbi Akiva Eiger). One cannot recite the sheva brachot since it is considered the next day. Also, many blessings are recited at a sheva brachot; a bracha consists of some heavy-duty names of G-d, which complicates the matter in this questionable state. If one just prolongs the Shabbat, he is only adding the prayer of retzai, which is found in the grace after meal and has no bracha. So, it’s not such a big deal. A remedy is to start earlier. This way one would have significant time for a fun and memorable time spent with the new couple.

Breakfast Cereals: Shredded Wheat & Granola (Parts 5 & 6 of the 6 Categories)

This week we conclude our breakfast cereal series. It can be very confusing which blessing one makes on any given cereal. Actually, some would proclaim it’s an adventure because of the complex ingredients found.

Before we discuss the last two categories, I would like to ask the readers what feelings come to mind when reading this? “My dad was so awesome. My neighbor and I wanted to collect the Pokémon toys in the box of Fruit Loops. So my dad bought an entire shelf of fruit loops in the supermarket so the two of us could eat through the cereals for the toys. Eventually, we figured out that we didn’t have to eat the cereal. We just dug down into the boxes for the toys”.

The fifth category is shredded cereals. Shredded wheat cereal is made from cooked wheat kernels, which are shredded and then baked. The bracha is mezonot.

Granola cereal is our last category of the series. Granola cereals are made from rolled oats and other ingredients, which are toasted. We have learned that grains which are roasted (without being cooked) are subject to the bracha of ha’odama.

Ah yes, who can forget the breakfast cereals, the cheap prizes, sugary milk left over, crossword puzzles and mazes found on the box. In grade school, we’d play Sigmund Freud by going over to people and trying to figure out their personalities by asking them what cereal they eat in the morning. Cereal is part of our culture; it’s part of our lives.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Mattos

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Mattos

July 21, 2011
19 Tammuz, 5771

Dear Friends,

In appreciation to the staff of The Afikim Foundation for all their help, and to Torahanytime.com for giving us the mic.

We will soon be starting to display business ads. Anyone who would like to submit a business ad, please email me or call 917-804-7692. We hope to put up ads B’H next week. It’s completely tax deductible and the proceeds go to teaching people Torah. Be a part of the Mitzvah!

In This Issue

Mattos – Anger

Murder of an Innocent Hassidic Little Boy

Planning A Trip To Israel

Breakfast Cereals: Extruded Dough (Part 4 of the 6 Categories)

Mattos – Anger

Anger is terrible; anger is horrifying! Our Sages described countless times in our holy scriptures the shortcomings and the consequences suffered by a person who becomes angry or enraged. Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz z’l believes the most striking and eye-raising effect of anger is that one loses all of ones’ wisdom and spiritual stature, an example we find in this week’s parsha, where Moshe forgot the law as a result of being angry (bamidbar31,14).
The Or Hachaim explains that Moshe had known the laws of mourning just minutes before he became angry, and then forgot them. This aspect of the effect of anger is puzzling. We can readily understand how anger affects a person so that after the fact he is of a lesser stature and wisdom then before. But how does anger make one’s previously acquired knowledge disappear? A minute ago he gave over a lesson teaching two plus two equals four, how can he now forget it? How does one lose wisdom which one already possesses?
The answer is that the mechanics of Torah wisdom works differently than other wisdoms. Other forms of wisdom do not relate to the personality or character of its possessor. A person may be wicked or obnoxious, and yet retain a storehouse of knowledge and wisdom. Not so with Torah wisdom. Torah is based on character development and it feeds the individual the sensitivity towards others and towards himself, hovering around the person until he internalizes it. Everyone hears the same message, but it doesn’t come through the pipes the same way to each. Apparently, the message received is tailor-made for that individual’s understanding and unique personality.
Dr. Goldman, the psychologist of Yeshiva Chafetz Chaim, says a fundamental aspect of life is intellectual growth; however not by feeding a computer. We are not some logical emotionless Vulcan circuit machine, like Mr. Spock, who will solve and rattle off any difficult equations backwards and forwards. Apparently, one should focus more on how to control his emotional nature and to be ready for every situation he’s confronted; this is a sign of strong character. By working on himself, a person’s internal vessel can hold and absorb the Torah with the proper character traits, which he developed through Torah study.
However, when there is a flaw in the personality, like anger, it chases away the Torah wisdom and spirituality. A person who becomes unfit to retain Torah, loses it; even the knowledge he already acquired leaves him. It’s not the knowledge itself that is affected but rather the individual that ceases to posses it.
Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz says, we can explain this further by drawing a parallel from the acquisition of prophesy to the acquisition of Torah. When Eliyahu, the prophet, ascended to the heavens in a fiery chariot, his disciples came to Elisha (who was very close to Eliyahu) and suggested that they search for the missing Eliyahu. Rashi (one of the mainstream commentaries) asks, ‘is it possible that these same prophets, who had foretold that Eliyahu would be taken, would forget as to his whereabouts? This teaches us that from the day Eliyahu was taken, spirituality left them. Rashi asks how did they forget that which they already knew? The answer is, a person must be a prophet in order to know these things. If he falls in stature, he no longer knows these facts of which he was aware only yesterday.
This is true of prophecy and it is true of Torah as well. It is the knowledge that must be integrated into itself into a person. But if a character becomes blemished, his Torah will vanish as well.

Murder of an Innocent Hassidic Little Boy

It was extremely disturbing to see pictures taken by a store video surveillance camera of a lost boy with a knapsack on his back walking the streets of Boro Park; knowing that a little while after, he will be killed. How can any human being do such an act? How can he face his maker, when the time comes? I’m ashamed that he’s considered part of the human race. If you ask his neighbors, most will agree they’re not surprised he did such an act. They considered him a creep and would instruct their kids to stay away from him.

Everything in life is a learning experience and there are some valuable lessons one can learn from this horrifying episode. Firstly, appreciate what G-d has given you. As the father of the murdered boy said at his son’s funeral, sobbing, ‘G-d gave me a gift for nine years’.
Another crucial lesson: in every neighborhood, in every synagogue; in every social arena, in the workplace, lies a creep just like that one. If you would think about it for a moment, we all have encountered creeps, regardless of the gender, they’re everywhere. But the question lies, what are we doing about it?
We asked the opinion of Doctor Goldman, the psychologist of Yeshiva Chafetz Chaim. Surprisingly, I thought he would chastise the communities for not doing enough against these problematic individuals. However, he only suggested avoiding these people as much as possible; even a Shabbat invite should not be extended to them. People might say Shabbat is the exception; Shabbat hospitality is supreme (Shabbat invite is the ultimate kindness and one can reach great heights spiritually with showing hospitality). But, he said do not give them any opportunity to get friendly with your family. One should give them money if they ask, but that’s it.
Dr. Goldman said there are quite a number of emotionally damaged individuals; however, 99% of them are pathetic and harmless. So I asked what about that 1%? One never knows when the loose cannon will go off? He mentioned that although extensive therapy will help, it’s enormously expensive, and besides, to get them to commit to enter a mental facility is practically impossible.
The doctor said this was a bizarre and unique case. We should teach our kids never talk to strangers whether they’re wearing a kippa or no kippa. The good doctor was more concerned with child molestation by authority figures such as teachers and counselors. Although most are good people, there is the minority, and parents have to be careful and a little more aware what happens in school. Unfortunately, a minority of the authoritative figures likes to prey on helpless defenseless children and the dangerous thing is that they look and act perfectly normal. We have to educate our kids and make them aware of the possible evils , which are lurking in our midst.

The notion that New Yorkers are unfriendly is something I always thought was an unfair description. We are warm and friendly, but for the most part, cautious. It’s very important to be cautious. We should make sure to implement this New York unfriendliness to our children; better safe than sorry!!

Planning A Trip To Israel

One of the primary vacation spots for Jewish travelers is Israel. It’s a yearly tourist attraction, whether it is summer vacations or any of the holidays. One of the major questions that arise, is whether to keep one or two days of the major holidays. We are referring to the holidays of Pesach, Shavuot and Succot. Outside of Israel we keep an extra day of Yom Tov (no turning on lights, etc). However, in Israel, they keep only one day. How many days should one keep if he lives outside the Holy Land and he comes to Israel for an undisclosed amount of time? Would time spent there matter? If he wants to extend his trip over thirty days, or six months or maybe over a year? At what point if any, could he keep one day? Would one be able to convince their Israeli relatives to sit with them while you conduct a second Seder?

There are a number of opinions. Many Sephardic and Ashkenazim agree that in order to keep one day, one has to not only seriously consider residing there for the rest of his life, but actually have to have made arrangements for residence and even the pursuit of job opportunities; then and only then may one be permitted to keep one day.

Rav Ovadia Yosef categorizes this further by stating that singles who go to Israel for an extended time to study, only keep one day because they might meet their mate and get married and make aliyah (move there permanently). Otherwise, married couples hold 2 days, like we discussed. Others are a bit more stricter. The decision to keep only one day does not lie solely on the bachur (single young man), or bachura (single young woman), but the parents have input as well. If they feel that he should not stay in Israel past a year, then that would indicate that he keep two days, not one.

Ashkenazim, for the most part, and other Sephardim do not hold like Rav Ovadia Yosef. However, there is yet another opinion. There are people who hold, like the Chacham Tzvi (like Lubavitch), who are much more lenient. Some interpret his opinion that it depends where the person’s family is currently stationed. If he is with his family in Israel, then they keep one day, and if not, two. This is a minority opinion.

I read an interesting halacha (law) given by Rav Ovadia Yosef, which I thought, was mind-boggling and I’d like to share this with you. Apparently, if one is a resident outside of Israel and has a business in the Holy Land, he must not reap any profits from the second day of Yom Tov, which the Israelis don’t hold, since it’s still a holiday for him outside of Israel because he is not residing there. Rabbi Chaim Wagner mentions, one can make arrangements with his partner (if he has one) that he (the partner) will solely benefit from the second day.

For most Jews living outside the Holy Land, every opportunity we have, one tends to make the choice to travel to Israel. We tend to feel and have a certain connection there and automatically gravitate to this spiritual source. If one does take advantage of this opportunity then one should follow the laws accordingly.

Breakfast Cereals: Extruded Dough (Part 4 of the 6 Categories)

It’s amazing how much manipulation Madison Avenue’s ads have on us, the American consumer. Americans buy two and a half billion packages of the 250 different types of cereal a year. What a business! There was a clever ad campaign by the cereal called, Wheaties, which actually is still running successfully today. It’s ‘The Breakfast of Champions’. If you eat this cereal with all its abundance of healthy nutrients, then you’ll be a champion. The finest athletes promoted this cereal. Apparently, the athletes were proud to be featured on the cover of the cereal box, while the sports fans flocked to buy these Wheaties because of the connection with their heroes.

In this article, we will discuss cereals, which contain extruded dough. Many cereals are made from extruded dough, which is squeezed (extruded) to form a shape, then oven puffed, gun puffed, baked or toasted. Extruded dough cereal is made from wheat, corn, rice or oat flour, alone or in mixtures. The dough is extruded into shapes like little o’s, alphabets, animals, bite size squares, rippled flakes, etc.

If it’s made from wheat, oat flour, or rice, the bracha is mezonot (such as Wheat Chex, Cheerios, Rice Chex). If it is made from corn flour, corn starches, or wheat starch, the bracha is shehakol (such as Corn Chex, Corn Pops, Ripple Crisp, Cocoa Puffs)
If the cereal has a substantial percentage of oat and/or wheat flour (multi grain) the bracha is mezonot.

If the cereal is made from bran only, which is the outer shell of a grain, the bracha is shehakol. If the cereal consists of bran, wheat, or oat four (Bran Flakes, with raisins) the bracha is mezonot.
Although, we are drawn to buy these cereals, the general consensus that most cereals, by in large, are healthy. If an ad campaign makes one feel good about eating the cereal and about himself, then by all means ‘Lets be like Mike’ (Michael Jordan).

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Pinchas

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Pinechas

July 14, 2011
5 Tammuz, 5771

Dear Friends,

In appreciation to the staff of The Afikim Foundation for all their help, and to Torahanytime.com for giving us the mic.

We will soon be starting to display business ads. Anyone who would like to submit a business ad, please email me.

In this issue, there is a recipe for delicious Rice Krispies treats.

With profound regret and sorrow, we mourn the loss of Leiby Kletzky, the boy who was murdered in Brooklyn.

In This Issue

Pinechas

Breakfast Cereals: Gun Puffed Whole Grain (Part 2 of the 6 Categories)

Rice Krispies Treats Recipe

Pinechas

The women of Midyan were on a special mission, as advised and encouraged by the wicked Bilam, to seduce the Jewish men, especially the high-ranking Israelite leaders. One of these leaders who fell victim was none other than the head prince of the tribe of Shimon, Zimri. He was so smitten by the seductress, Kozbi, where he showed a shocking display of brazenness, he brought her directly to Moshe and the elders at the entrance of the tent of Assembly, and sinned in public view. Moshe and the authorities were frozen, unable to make a decision, figuring that every effort was futile because of the heat of passion the Jewish men were subjected to, due to the Midyanite women. The quick-thinking Pinchas grabbed a spear and, with divine help, marched through 24,000 loyalists to Zimri and killed both Zimri and Kozbi in their act of sin.

Between the holidays of Pesach and Shavuot, we mourn the death of 24,000 students of Rabbi Akiva because they did not show honor to one another. We are taught by the Ari z’l that these same 24,000 students of Rabbi Akiva were the reincarnation of the 24,000 fellow comrades from the tribe of Shimon who sinned by having such a blind loyalty towards their leader Zimri. Tragically, the students who came back to fix the mistakes of their ancestors weren’t able to do so, showing the same bad traits as Zimri’s tribesmen showed. In both time periods, they succumbed to extremism, which resulted in their demise. It is important to show loyalty, but not blindly and not without thinking. The support of the fellow tribesmen of Zimri towards their leader brought a huge disgrace to G-d and the Jewish people. When they saw their leader sinning they should have stopped to think and weigh the concept of right and wrong and not follow him blindly towards destruction.

Apparently, the students of Rabbi Akiva weren’t able to control their appetite to be their competitive best. They pushed at the expense of their brothers. These were great tzadikim, Torah scholars, and the students of Rabbi Akiva, and yet they succumbed to ‘going overboard in their quest to succeed individually’.

In both incidences or I should say in both lifetimes, they had to control themselves, be level-headed, and not to go beyond the middle grounds; not go to ‘extremes’. The tribesmen had to realize their leader, Zimri’s, mistake and not blindly protect him. The students had to ease up on their drive to succeed and feel a little more compassion for their fellow Jew.

We learn from this Parsha a valuable lesson about life; one has to find a middle ground; everything in moderation. One cannot be too kind or too stingy, too nice or too snobby. The Torah teaches us, ‘Don’t add to what I commanded of you nor should you detract from it’. Don’t go to extremes, do what the Torah and its messengers, the Rabbis, command of you and nothing else. Otherwise, that would constitute a transgression.

Breakfast Cereals: Gun Puffed Whole Grain (Part 2 of the 6 Categories)

It’s a lot of fun when your learning partner has a wife that’s a great baker. When it wasn’t suitable to learn in Yeshiva, we would learn at his apartment and almost always, as proper etiquette permits, there would be a dessert or cold drinks offered. One time, something familiar was placed on the table where we were learning. I couldn’t quite place it; my chavrusa (learning partner) once again extended his hospitality and I gladly obliged and it was delicious!!!! It was Kellogg’s Rice Krispies treats. The familiar rice cereal that goes ‘snap, crackle, and pop’ was sweet in a cake form and had chocolate on top. Single life can be tough and grueling; at times, after a long day of work, one has to rush and travel long distances to go on a date with a complete stranger. On one occasion, I was waiting patiently for my blind date to make her entrance from her room, when her mother, who anticipated ‘the long getting ready time’ surprisingly, offered a plate of Rice Krispies treats. Perhaps she thought she would score brownie points for her daughter by presenting this heavenly food; the mother swore that the daughter baked it. Although it didn’t work out with that girl, I must say it was a pleasant surprise in a very tense part of my life of dating.

One day, early on in my marriage, I mentioned to my wife about Rice Krispies treats, describing the good positive attributes of the desert. Where soon thereafter, lo and behold, l’kavod Shabbat and all, there it was! My wife found the recipe and walla!! (Recipe will follow the article.)

Brachot and cereal is a complex business. Last week, we described ‘oven puffed crisp rice’ (Rice Krispies) and we said the bracha is Mezonot. Cereal is made differently from this process and the next category, which is ‘gun puffed whole grain’ (Sugar Crisp). It’s either made from wheat or rice. The bracha is ho’adama. In this process, whole grain kernels are sealed in a chamber (gun), which is heated and pressurized. When the kernels are released (shot) the pressure escaping from the kernels causes them to pop and puff.

Rabbi Avraham Sebrow of Yeshiva Chafetz Chaim points out that in this process, the grain is not processed enough to lose its identity; therefore, the bracha is Ha’odama. Wherein ‘oven puffed’, the bran is removed, resulting in losing that whole grain status; therefore, it’s mezonot.

How important is it to make the right brachot on foods? The zohar alludes to a concept that’s quite difficult to understand. As punishment for transgressions done in this world, the soul returns and is entrapped in various inanimate objects; and the only way to be released is if someone makes the right bracha on it.

We see another lesson of brachot and that is the importance of unity. We should help each other out, at whatever state. This is why it is important to be meticulous in this matter.

Rice Krispies Treats Recipe

Ingredients

6 cups Rice Krispies

1 cup light corn syrup

1 cup sugar

1 cup peanut butter

7 ounce baking chocolate

Directions

In a pot, add corn syrup and sugar on low flame to a boil. As soon as the sugar melts, add the peanut butter. (Unless you like eating burnt tasting treats, when the sugar and peanut butter are added, make sure they don’t burn.) Once the peanut butter is melted and the mixture comes to a boil, immediately add the Rice Krispies. Make sure all the added ingredients are combined. Turn off your stove-top. Your 9 x 13 baking pan should be coated with Pam oil spray. Pour the mixture in to the pan and even out. Melt the chocolate on a low flame, using the double boiler technique or the microwave. Just don’t burn the chocolate! Sprinkle the hot melted chocolate on to the Rice Krispies treats. Cut the Rice Krispies treats in to serving sizes and eat. Bon Appétit!

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Chukat

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Chukas

June 30, 2011
28 Sivan, 5771

Dear Friends,

Please tune in to www.torahanytime.com for my lectures and many others. This site is ‘G-d’s reason for the internet.’

A special thanks to the Afikim staff for all their help.

In This Issue

Breakfast Cereals

Chukas

Breakfast Cereals

Cereals have been a staple on the American breakfast table for over a hundred years. I still remember the standard and most famous brands of yesteryear, which are even currently used today as well; Kellogg’s Corn flakes, Rice Krispies (…. and you really hear them go ‘snap, crackle, and pop’) and Raisin Bran (two scoops of raisins is plenty good). There were various types of cereals catered for all walks of life. The kids’ cereal always had ‘inside the box prizes’; my favorite was the 3D Baseball cards. At times today, I still sneak a bowl of my kids’ Honey Nut Cheerios. Does anyone out there remember Tony the Tiger’s ‘It’s great!!!’ or the various flavors of Cap’n Crunch?

As children, we found it challenging to figure out what brachot to make, when to make it and how many. There was the debate among the school kids; ‘Do we make one bracha to cover both the milk and cereal, or two separate ones? (If one recalls, we discussed in our earlier newsletters the concept of ikar (main food) and tofel (enhancers).) Usually, most people add milk (enhancer) to cereal; therefore, the bracha is only recited on the cereal because the cereal is the ikar (main food). In a typical case, when one adds milk not as an enhancer (on a high calcium diet or is also interested in drinking milk), then one makes the bracha on both.

Throughout my life, I would frequently visit Israel, and in my youth, on those visits, there was a tremendous void at the breakfast table. Israelis are not accustomed to cereal in the morning or for that matter, at all. When I was learning in Yeshiva in Jerusalem in my twenties, the American students discovered a makolet (grocery) that sells American products including cereal. It was cool and definitely out of place to be in Israel and have a bowl of Corn Flakes and hearing outside your window ‘AVATIACH AVATIACH!’ (AVATIACH, meaning “watermelon” in Hebrew, is called out as vendors are selling watermelon, so people would know it is being sold. It represents one of the features of Israel. You therefore feel like you’re in Israel, while eating an American breakfast!)

Now that we clarified what’s the priority, whether it be the cereal or the milk; one may ask, what about the cereal itself? Ready-to-eat cereals are made primarily of corn, wheat, oats or rice, and can be grouped into one of the following six categories: 1) Flakes (Corn Flakes) bracha is: ho’adama 2) Oven Puffed Crisp Rice (Rice Krispies) bracha is: mezonot 3) Gum Puffed Whole Grain (Puffed Rice) bracha is: ho’adama 4) Extruded Dough( Cheerios, Alpha Bits) bracha is: mezonot 5) Shredded Wheat – bracha is mezonot 6) Granola – the bracha is ho’adama.

This week we can only discuss one of the six categories since we’re trying to be concise as possible. We will discuss the category of flakes (Corn Flakes.) The process consists of passing pieces of corn kernels between two rollers, thereby pressing them into flakes. The bracha is ho’adama because the corn kernels are still intact when served. Although in another process, corn is cooked into dough and excreted (pressed, formed and cut) into small pallets. These pallets are then rolled into flakes; the bracha for this process is shehakol.

One has to wonder why is cereal so popular in the states? So I asked my son, what does he like about cereal. He said something interesting; he said ‘its easy to prepare, all it takes is a bowl, spoon, milk, and cereal and you have a meal’…. a healthy meal mind you!

Chukas

The children of Israel screamed out, ‘We want water! We want water!’ Where thereafter, Moshe took the stick and hit the rock resulting in water streaming out. ‘Why did you hit the rock?’ G-d asked disappointingly. The Sages were unclear what exactly was G-d’s commandment to Moshe, the leader of the Jewish people. Was Moshe commanded to speak to the rock whereby instead he hit it? Or the fact that G d instructed Moshe to take his stick, presumably, indicates He may have wanted him to hit it. This is the question in which Rav Henoch Leibowitz z’l of Yeshiva Chafetz Chaim presents. Was the commandment to ‘speak’ or ‘hit’ the rock?

We know Moshe was punished for this incident and was prohibited to enter the land of Israel – something that he desired greatly. Despite praying and pleading with G-d before he died, his quest to pilgrimage with the rest of the Jewish people to Israel was denied.

The answer to this question is both. Moshe was commanded to speak to the Israelites first, in front of the rock, and to announce G-d’s great miracle in a thunderous way. It will take place through His trusted servant who will perform the task by hitting it. However, Moshe and Aharon merely said, ‘Listen up; we will now draw water from the rock by hitting it’. Moshe and Aharon had to be clearer and emphasize the wondrous hand of G-d, that this was amomentous moment. Therefore because they weren’t clear, G-d rebuked them, stating ‘you did not believe in me.’

But isn’t it clear and pretty obvious that G-d commanded Moshe. The Israelites knew Moshe was His faithful servant and every breath, every step , which was taken, was done with G-d’s signature. I mean -really – it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out G-d is pushing the controls.

Perhaps the Torah is trying to teach us an important lesson about ourselves. Man has a much higher impression and a stronger feeling when the information he receives is straightforward and clear (stating G-D DID IT!). However, if the message is trickled down by hints, it doesn’t have the same effect; it’s not impactful. Therefore, when G-d said ‘you are not believers in enhancing my ambiance in the eyes of the children of Israel’. By Moshe and Aharon not elaborating their action, they caused a decreased spiritual force in the world. The result of the ‘hint’ weakened the impression that it was G-d who made the water come out from the rock.

G-d gave us the gift of speech; something animals lack, and it’s our obligation to express ourselves properly. We all heard of the expression ‘words penetrate the heart’. The sages say there is no comparison between hearing, which has a stronger effect than seeing. G-d set the stage for Moshe to infuse his awareness upon the Israelites; he had to articulate with his speech what G-d planned to do. Think of it as an announcer describing an exciting baseball game. The announcer has to be gifted in describing the game and keeping the fans, tuned in and interested. I have an aunt living in Israel who would always talk very positively about the land and the Jewish people. Every time we come across a positive experience, she would comment, ‘You see, you don’t need to go to America. You have America here.’ She would verbally describe every experience and make it seem adventurously fun. My aunt has a gifted knack to use her words to the fullest ….. Unfortunately, Moshe missed that precious opportunity.

We have to learn from this incident that G-d bestowed upon man the precious gift of speech and it’s our responsibility to utilize it to the best of our ability.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Korach

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Korach

June 23, 2011

21 Sivan, 5771

Dear Friends,

A special thanks to Joey Garelic for editing and to the Afikim staff for all their help.

In This Issue

The Art of Comedy

Sometimes Laughter is the Best Medicine

The Art of Comedy

After reading the portion relating to Korach, one has to ask why was he punished so severely? After all, he seemingly thought he was in line to receive a high position, but was apparently passed over to the other members of the Kahat family (grandfather of both Moshe and Korach), specifically, Elizafan, the youngest son’s children. Korach felt slighted, since his father was older, and wondered why? “I’m an upstanding citizen and a Torah scholar and by the alignment of Kahat’s sons, I’m the next to be appointed. I feel this job is a perfect fit”. He didn’t deny G-d. In fact, he merely wanted to help by providing his services to the Jewish people and to G-d. Although there is no denying he wanted to overthrow the hierarchy of Moshe’s government, he sincerely thought he was the right man for the job. As such, the severity of the punishment seems at face value a little harsh.

As Korach and his assembly were waiting for a showdown with the camp of Moshe, the ground opened up and swallowed them up alive.

How did this occur? What transpired? How did Korach succeed in creating an assembly of followers to counter Moshe’s leadership?

One may only need to look to modern times here in America to see how this can happen. Through technology, the American society magnified and popularized the median of comedy starting in the late 50’s. The convenience of television brought many comedians such as, Milton Berle, Jack Benny, Jackie Gleason, Art Carney, Don Rickles, Richard Pryer, and Johnny Carson just to name a few. I can go on and on with a smirk on my face and a chuckle inside. These comedians would make fun of everything that society has to offer.

By the mid 60’s and beyond as television became more affordable, the comedians spread their material to the political front. Politicians became prime targets of late night talk show comedians like Carson, Letterman and Leno. It became a ritual that a new president-elect would get repeatedly roasted and grilled by the onslaught of comedians.

Apparently, it is not a coincidence that the disrespect these political figures endure by American citizens as manifest by such comedians as well as by the masses at office water coolers throughout the country, begins around the same time. Kennedy was perhaps the last respected president (one may argue Reagan). The tragedy of when Kennedy was assassinated put the nation in such a solemn mood. Even my father, an immigrant at the time for only a year, cried. It is hard to believe anyone can elicit that kind of reaction from the nation today. The reason for the respect Kennedy received was that political bashing and comic needling were not yet fully established. Gerald Ford was a gifted athlete but one of the reasons he lost his bid for reelection (besides Watergate which nearly ruined his Republican party) was a little misstep where he physically tripped. This rather common human occurrence triggered an impersonation by a Saturday Night Live comedian Chevy Chase portraying Ford as tripping constantly. Chase and the writers of the show, for many months were relentless and created the impression that President Ford was a klutzy, bumbling fool.

G-d is very sensitive to the kavod or honor of people, especially His chosen people. We see this from our forefather Avraham when his son Yitzchok was born. Everybody thought and assumed Yizchok could not possibly be his child since he could not have kids with his wife Sarah for many years. G-d made sure, to avoid the smirking and the back door jokes by having Yitzchok look exactly like his father. But why bother and care what a few yentas and fools say? We see how impressionable people can be.

In order to discredit Moshe, Korach ridiculed him and his leadership. He used comedy as a weapon. Comedy can be used as a positive or negative force. It can be therapeutic or lethal depending how it is used. One may say he was the first stand up comedian, but unfortunately a lethal one. Korach and his assembly, by denying Moshe’s authority as G-d’s messenger, denied the legitimacy of the Torah. By denying the messenger they are denying the one who sent him, and if so, there remains no foundation to Torah or prophecy. If Korach’s argument had any basis, then the entire Torah would be null and void for it was based on Moshe’s having been sent by G-d.

One can ruin the legitimacy of a person and his teaching by one sarcastic remark or even one derogatory facial expression such as the rolling of the eyes. This could be accomplished by the negative side of comedy. G-d says “I created man in my name and in my honor” meaning there must be respect given to man because if one disrespects man one also disrespects G-d. May we all learn from the Korach experience and be cautious not to jest mockingly and be careful to respect one another in the fullest sense.

Sometimes Laughter is the Best Medicine

The Chozer of Lublin was one of the greatest of his generation. In fact, many people went to him for Brachot (blessings). They came to him for refuah shelemah (health), to find the right soul mate, better their financial situation and for many other reasons. It seemed he was a sure bet. Whatever the request for a blessing from G-d they asked from him, he would give a bracha and a short time latter it would be fulfilled.

What was his method to success?

Every night the Chozer of Lublin would recite the special midnight prayer to G-d and he would curl up, scream, yell and cry like a baby until he felt his prayers were accepted in heaven. Hey – whatever works, right?

One night while he was waiting for his student, Rav Naftali Rupshitz to come, he felt that his prayers to G-d were not being heard. He wondered. His routine was the same as any other night and yet now, no one seemed to be listening. So he asked the heavens “what is going on up there”? “If you want to understand the reason, just look at your student, Rav Naftali Rupshitz” was the heavenly response. Apparently on his way to his Rebbi that night, he stopped at an inn and he noticed there was a wedding celebration. As he walks in to a room of dancing he noticed that the Kallah (bride) was sad. So he approached her and asked: “Why are you sad? This is supposed to be the happiest day of your life”! She replied “ourbatchan canceled on us and we have no one to tell jokes.” A batchan -comedian was often used at the time and even today at the weddings of Chassidim to make the bring joy to the new couple.

Rav Naftali looked at her and replied “I’ll be your batchan.” He then stood on a chair and started telling joke after joke until he got the entire inn’s attention. He had the whole place on their knees as result from his funny jokes. Rav Naftali noticed from the corner of his eye that the Chatan and Kallah were really enjoying his routine. He was indeed hilarious. It seemed like the young couple and the people at the inn were not the only ones to take notice, the angels in heaven also stopped what they were doing to hear Rav Naftali. It was such an impressive and funny performance that even G-d stopped to listen. All the angels closed up shop to hear this Jewish Rabbi make the world laugh. This is the reason your prayers were not heard, everybody was out for the evening enjoying Rav Naftali at the wedding party.

When Rav Naftali finally arrived at his Rebbe’s house, the Chozer of Lublin said to him “what I do with screaming, wailing and yelling you accomplish with laughter!”

We mentioned in the preceding Dvar Torah on the Parshat Korach, how comedy is can be very dangerous. In fact, it is a two edged sword. As such, it is only fitting that we also see the benefits as well. How important it is to make people laugh in a positive sense and to cheer them up when they are down and depressed. Moreover, it’s a big mitzvah (commandment) to make a bride and groom happy. The rewards are tremendous. We realize from this story, it is indeed priceless!!

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Shelach

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Shelach

June 16, 2011

14 Sivan, 5771

Dear Friends,

The first article, “The Spy Who Loved Me”, is based on a lecture called “Jewish Spy in History” written by Rabbi Avi Matmon.

A special thanks to Joey Garelic for editing and to the Afikim staff for all their help.

In This Issue

The Spy Who Loves Me

Shelach

The Spy Who Loves Me

One of the main stages of the Sephardic (Bukharin) cantorial recitation is the reading of the prayer “Nishmat kol chai” on Shabbat morning. I remember my father and I anxiously preparing to go to Synagogue, trying to get there before the Chazzan starts the Shacharit prayer. Moreover, when the high holidays arrived, the excitement was even greater having guest Chazzanim like Yigal ben Chaim and Eli Balchioff who happen to be regarded as from the best of their generation. It was a pleasure and a privilege to hear them recite “Nishmat kol chai.” It was without a doubt a tremendously moving and inspiring experience.

One may ask, why is Nishmat the measuring stick of the cantorial recital? The prayer Nishmat is so important that if one comes late to services and the congregation is reciting this particular prayer at that point, he must recite it with them and delay his own prayer from the beginning part of the teffilah which he missed, due to being late. Furthermore, the sages say, Nishmat is the jump start of the “neshema yetera” (the additional soul which one receives on Shabbat that elevating us to a holier level).

What is it that is so special about this particular prayer? In order to reveal the understanding of the prayer of ‘Nishmat’ we have to look back at a little Jewish history.Approximately 2000 years ago an off-shoot religion, Christianity, was just stemming from Judaism. The Great Sanhedrin (the 71 judges of the great court of Israel) was led by their president, Rabbi Shimon ben Gamliel. He discreetly approached a fellow by the name of Shimon Kaffa concerning a very important mission. Apparently the Jewish leaders were very concerned that their people might abandon Judaism for this new Christianity. They wanted Kaffa to infiltrate their hierarchy of the Church. His mission was to make a clear distinction between the two religions, so that Jews will not err and be lured in, believing it is just another stream of Judaism and a valid form of Jewish worship.

After many years of being undercover Shimon Kaffa became one of the primary players of Christianity. Some say he was none other than Peter. (Although history is a bit unclear at that time, many maintain that this is in fact accurate.) While the spy business can be exiting, it is very dangerous in many ways. It happened that Shimon Kaffa’s true identity was revealed and soon thereafter he was tortured and executed. He did, however, succeed in his mission. Under his influence, the Christian Sabbath was changed from Judaism’s Saturday to Sunday; Jesus was specifically and individually labeled the son of G-d (note that all Jews are labeled as G-d’s children); the Christian messiah did and will not come from a natural human being as Judaism commands, but rather a supernatural creation resulting form immaculate conception. These differences were stark and were sufficient to make it clear to Jews that Christianity was indeed a separate entity and not merely a new flavor of Judaism. Thankfully, Shimon Kaffa skillfully crafted these fundamental deviations from Torah Judaism so that only a minute few Jews expressed interest in following Christianity.

Perhaps a good example which will clarify my point is a motion picture based on a true story called “Donny Brosko.” The film depicts an undercover police officer who infiltrates the mob. In the beginning of his assignment the officer wore his badge while not undercover with pride; “I’m doing the right thing” was the impression he conveyed. There was a clear distinction between right and wrong – good guy versus bad guy. Dr. Goldman, the psychologist at Yeshiva Chaffetz Haim, says that even when there is a clear cut right and wrong, people are very sensitive and are affected by the social influences surrounding them. The spy is a lone believer in his values surrounded by those with diametrically opposed views. His only venue of expression is internal given his hostile surroundings. This presents a major problem according to Dr. Goldman. While pretending to be somebody else with polar opposite values, often times the spy himself can wind up inevitably questioning his original set of values and ideologies. It takes a very high level of conviction and devotion to one’s own values to maintain such pretence over a period of time. “Frankly,” Dr Goldman says, “it is almost impossible.” On a subconscious level, intellectual dishonesty does not sit well with human nature.

The police officer in the film did in fact begin to sympathize with some of the mob members. At a startling moment in the film, he smacks his wife which was tremendously out of character for his regular self. Was it possible that his true self was being sucked into his fictitious persona? Perhaps his intellectual armor was cracking and as with many, he begins to think and act like those around him. Perhaps he, like others, begins to actually embrace his new identity. After all, that’s the reason his superiors selected him in the first place, because they felt he would be “perfect” for the part.

At the conclusion of the film when the officer received his medal of citation for a successful mission by sending those mob members to prison, he conveyed an expression of uneasiness and a sense of guilt. What happened to his strong ideology? One has to realize the enormous difficulty of a spy’s mission. How difficult it is to maintain one’s beliefs and ideology in such an atmosphere!
This has all been quite interesting, but how does this story relate to the point I am trying to speak about? It relates quite strongly as it was none other than Shimon Kaffa who wrote “Nishmat kol chai.” This prayer is about ultimate appreciation of G-d through the eyes of a Jew. Perhaps he wanted to show that even though I am away from my people and cannot express my true feelings outwardly I am still able to maintain my allegiance to G-d and to the Jewish people – a most difficult and daunting task for him. We, therefore, sing this prayer outwardly as a congregation; whereas Shimon Kaffa could only scream it inwardly with silent devotion to G-d. We do this not only as a tribute to Shimon Kaffa’s mission but to show that whatever situation we are in, we must find away to appreciate G-d, for He is the true epicenter of our lives. G-d created human nature such that Shabbat morning a person reaches the highest level of spirituality as well physical and mental relaxation. Shimon Kaffa paved the road for us to use ‘Nishmat’ as a tool to get close to G-d at a very lofty level. And that is what inspired my father and continues to inspire me. May we all be so inspired every Shabbat morning.

Shelach

In this week’s Torah reading, the Israelites were about to enter the land of Israel. It was long anticipated because of the promise G-d gave our forefathers, Avraham, Yitzhak and Yaakov that their children will enter and inherit the land of milk and honey. Despite G-d’s overt declaration, the Jews were still apprehensive and concerned of the dangerous inhabitants that were rumored to be roaming the land. So they asked their leader, Moshe, to send reconnaissance spies to tour the land and to report if their fears were founded or unfounded.

The report came back with only the exception of two of the 12 spies who represented each respective tribe, that their fears were justified. This only increased the fears of the Jewish people. The spies were not truthful with their findings and their motives were tainted. As a result they were punished severely with death. The Sages explain their motive was the concern that their high positions held in the dessert would be in jeopardy once they entered the Land. Losing their kavod (honor) was the primary motive for their despicable act.

Scripture describes these men as tzadikim, top guns, and the cream of the crop. These men were leaders as well as torah scholars. How then could they have erred so egregiously? Furthermore, it is hard to believe that these men were hand picked by the greatest leader of all time – Moshe Rabbeinu with the approval none other than G-d! Something must have taken place between the time they were selected and the time they returned. What happened? What changed?

Rav Dessler questions in his book Michtav Me’eliyahu, what propelled these otherwise honorable men to decline to a level of feeling that it was a imperative to maintain their position (kavod) to the extent of filing a malicious report? Obviously, the spies considered this an important and dangerous mission and they were proud of their appointment to this tough task. After all, they were performing G-d’s mission. Rav Dessler contends that what tends to happen is that one often times get too caught up in a new appointment and that one forgets about the most obvious, being careful to protect oneself. In a way, a person can be very vulnerable. He lets his guard down and forgets about his basic fundamental manners and sensitivities towards others. People may feel that because they are doing a mitzvah for G-d, that they now have the license to step on anybody and anything to achieve their G-dly mission. As a result, they become insensitive and hurt people along the way.

Rav Yisrael Silanter mentions an episode where a man was walking to synagogue on Yom Kippur and he was praying on the way. A fellow Jew stops him and asks him for the time. The response was of one of agitation and anger. The one who was praying ignored him “I’m on a holy mission – I’m praying to G-d.” This person ignored the need of someone else because he was so preoccupied with his own prayer.

I remember every Sunday morning they had baseball games organized by the New York Synagogue baseball league. This fellow was in charge of our Synagogue (Bet Hakneset) team. Unfortunately, he took the volunteer leadership role a little too seriously. He removed a close friend of his from his second base position and asked him to leave the team because he wasn’t good enough. “I am managing this team to win” he said. He did not realize the objective of the organized baseball league was to have fun and relax on a Sunday early morning and bring all the kids together in a spirit of sportsmanship teaching them to relate better with one another in all aspects of life. It seems that the drive to be anointed as the winner above one’s peers is hereditary. When one is appointed to a responsible position often times their teeth grow long and sharp, their ears grow a little long and their jaw extends downward. The human element disappears.

Rav Dessler writes when one lets his guard down even just a little, it opens the door to negativity. In the situation of the spies, it was overlooking and neglecting an individual conscience awareness which helps protect oneself daily. This led them to entertain the thought of “not losing my status and kavod” as they were preoccupied with trying to be the best and most honored spies out there.

Life is full of opportunities and growth. One has to realize when taking these progressive steps not to overlook a very important person – “yourself.” This is not necessarily in the conventional sense of self power. Quite to the contrary, it is in the sense that one must be vigilant not to let success and honor go to one’s head to extent that it is nurtured and sought after at the expense of all else. One must be careful to protect one’s “midot” or virtues and realize that there is a larger picture beyond ones self. It was Yehoshua Bin-Nun from the tribe of Efraim and Nachshon ben Aminadav representing the tribe of Yehuda that held true to themselves and ultimately true to their people and G-d. This is a lesson we can learn from the spies and to mirror the acts of Yehoshua and Nachshon in our own lives.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Naso

May 5, 2013 Rabbi Avi Matmon Highlights on the Weekly Parsha, Uncategorized No comments

“A Cup of Coffee

A Quick Thought”

Spark Of Jewish Experience

Nasso

June 2, 2011

29 Iyar, 5771

Dear Friends,

For those of you who had the opportunity and privilege to learn Torah on a consistent basis throughout the year – or even a minimal amount – you should feel very proud about the upcoming holiday of Shavuot. It commemorates the Jews receiving the Torah from G-d on Mount Sinai. May G-d give us the opportunity to increase the amount of our learning and enjoy the fascinating gift which He bestowed upon us. Enjoy the holiday!!!

In This Issue

Love & Fear

Shavuot

Love & Fear

The scripture (Parshat Yitro 19:1-25) describes in detail the monumental event of the Jewish people receiving the Torah. But one may raise his eyebrow as to where our ancestors were camped when the revelation occurred. The literal translation of where they were standing was, under the mountain. We assumed the Torah is indicating they were near the mountain, but Rashi, the mainstream commentary on the Torah, seems to believe that G-d raised the mountain over the heads of the Israelites and threatened them ‘if you do not except the Torah I’m going to drop the mountain and kill you now!’

Presumably, this seems to be contradicting to what we were led to believe, so proudly,’NA’ASSE VE NISHMA’; meaning we will accept the Torah so blindly that we will do the commandments first, and receive the explanations later. All the other nations probed ‘what’s in it?’ and then rejected it; however, our ancestors embraced it. ‘Hey! We agreed on the conditions without even looking at the contract, so why is G- d forcing us for no reason? ‘

Rabbi Jay Shapiro, one of my mentors, quotes Rav Eliyahu Lapian’s parable and explanation on the contradiction. I think this parable is really cool. Back in the days, there was a king that was very popular and loved by all. He had an important meeting cross-country and the optimal form of transportation was the royal train. It was a three-day trip, with planned designated stops all throughout the country. Towards the end of his route to the meeting, the royal train pulls into this town. It seemed like the townspeople were hungrily ready for his arrival. Banners were hanging on the rafters of the train station with the words ‘WE LOVE YOU KING’; the band was playing his favorite song in between a presentation by the second grade choir of its prestigious school; the clowns were juggling; the hot dog stand was full.

All were waiting to see the Majesty King; the enthusiastic noise was getting more intense. After fifteen minutes, a guard emerges and made an announcement. ‘The King loves you all but he had a long day and he’s trying to get some sleep; he has a major conference tomorrow and he would appreciate some quiet.’ After he returned back to the train the crowd continued the noise. ‘WE LOVE YOU KING!’ they proclaimed showing more of their intense love. The band played louder; the juggler added another ball; more hotdogs and Marino’s ices were added. A little while later, a guard emerged from the train, this time slightly agitated and a bit more firm, ‘We ask you nicely, the King has a very important meeting tomorrow and needs his sleep. Please refrain from noise’. The guard disappeared back into the train presumably satisfied that his words made an impression. But that did not stop the crowd; they anticipated this day for a while and were eager to show their love and affection to the king.

Ten minutes later six guards appeared on the high platform next to the locomotive, carrying submachine guns (they had machine guns in those days? No, I actually altered the story a bit to bring home the point). The head goon with the dark sunglasses spoke up, ‘Whoever makes another sound will be shot’. As a result of these frightening words, one can hear a pin drop among the three thousand well-wishers.

Rav Lapian asks, ‘Do they still love their king?’ The answer is yes, but now they fear him as well as love him. If there would be no fear, the important mission would not have been accomplished properly, even though the right intentions were at heart.

In order for us to function as proper Jews and to adhere to his laws correctly, progressively and efficiently, one has to incorporate a little fear as well as the love that one dearly possesses for Him, or else there will be total chaos. A person may eat pig and say ‘I appreciate the food G d has giving me’. There is an expression, which is used frequently ‘I love G d in my heart and I’ll show it my way’. This is considered inappropriate; there has to be rules and they have to be followed. For example, if one violates Shabbat he will pay the consequences. Logically, it makes sense to have law and order, or religion will be a free for all.

This is what G-d wanted to show the Israelites by picking up the mountain and threatening them – that love and fear are part and parcel. This is also the lesson that G-d is trying to convey to us. One needs both to be a proper Jew.

Shavuot

When our ancestors uttered the famous line ‘NA’ASE VE NISHMA’, which propelled G-d to place us above all the nations, the angels asked ‘how do the Israelites know our secret’? One may ask, what secret are they talking about? And also, what is so important about the phrase that G-d found to be so important? In order to understand this, one has to examine a conversation between King Solomon and Hiram the king of Tyre.

‘You know that my father David was not able to build a house for G-d due to the wars that surrounded him’, Shlomo proclaimed. However this seems a bit hard to understand. Although King David fought many wars, he still made time to do various important functions, one of which was writing Psalms. Furthermore, there is a clear indication from the scripture, ‘The king was sitting in his house and G-d had given him respite from all his enemies’, seemingly, that David had time and was even planning the blueprint of the Temple. So why wasn’t he allowed to build it?

It is important to note a vital piece of history, which will help us understand this further. One of the reasons that the Jews were prohibited to attend the party of Achashverosh the king of Persia, (this is the story that commemorates the holiday of Purim) was because the utensils that were used at the party were the same ones used in the holy temple. They were taken by Nevuchanetzar, king of Babylonia after he destroyed the temple approximately 2500 years ago. It was then passed down to Queen Vashti, first wife of Achashverosh, who was Nevuchanetzar’s granddaughter. Besides the utensils, Achashverosh went through great pains to wear the original garbs of the high priest, which were worn when he performed his duties. What, may you ask, was the motive of the Persian king?

Achashverosh was a student of history and took note that whenever the Jews went to battle, before they proceeded, they went in the temple, prayed to their G-d and were victorious instantly. He presumably thought the garb, which I will wear, and the utensils, which will be used at my ceremonial party, will guarantee victory among my enemies.

However, G-d said ‘build me a temple, for me’and Rashi (mainstream commentary on the Torah) explains, ‘for my sake, one should build a temple with no ulterior motives’. For this reason, David was not allowed to build the temple, because people might think, and David himself might be tempted, that he had ulterior motives to build the temple so he can be victorious in his battles and not for the sake of G-d at all. Therefore, his son Shlomo, who lives in peace and tranquil times and would be sincerein his dedication to G-d, was allowed to build it.

One of the key and unique character traits, which Jews have, is the potential to possess sincerity. This is what they displayed on Mount Sinai when they proudly and lovingly proclaimed NA’ASSE VE NISHMA’. Sincerity is the secret that the angels possess in which they thought was their exclusive. They perform their duties solely and efficiently without any ulterior motives. Perhaps that is the reason David was prohibited to build the temple; humans reach an angelic state of holiness when doing the duties in G-d’s house.

Although it is difficult to be 100% sincere, human nature has tendencies in which there is always a bit of an ulterior motive involved; and it is understandable that one cannot manufacture feelings. However, in performing good deeds to our fellow human being, one may perhaps envision the benefit that the person you are doing the kindness to is receiving, and through that action develops sincerity.

Sincerely,

Rabbi Avi Matmon

Spark of Jewish Experience

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