Archive for Highlights

Parshat Chayei Sarah

“A Cup of Coffee 

 

&

A Quick Thought”

Steaming Cup of Coffee
Spark Of Jewish Experience
  Chayei Sarah

November 17, 2011
20 Cheshvan, 5772

Dear Friends,

 

In appreciation to the staff of The Afikim Foundation for all their help, and to Torahanytime.com for giving us the mic.

 

We are now displaying business ads in our newsletter. If you are interested in placing an ad, please email me or call 917-804-7692. It’s completely tax deductible and the proceeds go to teaching people Torah. Be a part of the Mitzvah!

 

Please print out this newsletter and say over a great D’var Torah at the Friday night Shabbos table.

 

Please forward to a friend and be a partner in spreading Torah.

 

Dedicate a newsletter, shuir and a CD in memory of a loved one.

 

In This Issue
Parshat Chayei Sarah Highlights
Parshat Chayei Sarah – The Art of Adapting
Source of Tradition
Important Note Before Shabbat

Parshat Chayei Sarah Highlights
 

* We open the parsha with the narrative accounting of Sarah’s (Abraham’s wife) age, implying that she has passed on.

 

* Abraham buys a burial plot (Ma’arat Hamachpela) from Efron Hachiti (this is where Adam and Eve are buried).

 

* Abraham sends Eliezer, his trusted advisor, to Charan, to find a wife for his son Yitzchak.

 

* As Eliezer arrives at the outskirts of Charan, he camps by the well where a young girl offers to serve him and his camels water. Eliezer’s prayers were answered because the girl who showed the tremendous kindness was none other than Rivka, the daughter of Betuel, Abraham’s relative. Eliezer knew he has met Yitzchak’s soul mate.

 

* Eliezer consummates the deal with Rivka’s family; here, we are introduced to Lavan, Rivka’s brother, for the first time.

 

* Eliezer brings her home to Yitzchak where they become husband and wife.

 

* Abraham marries Keturah (Rashi says she is Hagar) where she bears him 6 sons, all of which got presents and were sent away; meaning they were not the primary sons of Abraham.

 

* Abraham dies at the age 175 and his sons Yitzchak and Yishmael bury him.

 

* Yishmael dies.

Parshat Chayei Sarah – The Art of Adapting
abraham's tent

In life, one must learn to adapt to a situation, whether it be work, school, marriage, birth, death, diet, or with friends. No matter how harsh living conditions may be, no matter how difficult the environment, no matter how irritating or obnoxious the person, a human being is able to adapt and survive. But, we shall shortly learn from the teaching of Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz, that there is an important ingredient, which should be infused in the process of adapting, in order for it to be successful.

It is this message, which will clarify to us the difference between Abraham’s reaction to G-d’s command to bring his son Yitzchak as a sacrifice, as opposed to that of his wife Sarah. Abraham was eager to fulfill G-d’s command. Sarah, on the other hand, when she heard what had transpired, could not bear the news, and died instantly. How can two great people have reacted so differently to the same event? What makes this question even more puzzling, was that Sarah was on a higher level then her husband in prophecy.

The answer is that Abraham was made aware in agradual manner that Yitzchak was to be brought as a sacrifice, thus allowing his feelings and emotions to adapt to the challenge awaiting him. G-d told him ‘Take your son’ then ‘your only son whom you love’. Only then did he inform him that Yitzchak was to be sacrificed.Thus, if Abraham had been confronted suddenly that it was Yitzchak who was to be sacrificed, he would not have survived. It was the gradual realization of this fact that made him digest this. He was therefore able to perform G-d’s command. Such was not the case with Sarah who was suddenly overwhelmed by the realization of what had happened and died resulting from the shock.

Another example of how delicate and gradual one must be, is G-d’s reaction after Adam sinned by eating from the tree of knowledge. G-d appeared close to Adam and asked ‘Where are you?’ G-d knew where Adam was, but He wanted to confront him in a manner that he would not be startled. The guilt of his sin was overwhelming; any sudden confrontation would have emotionally destroyed Adam.

Let’s not forget Serach bat Asher, the granddaughter of our father Yaacov, who played the harp singing ‘Yosef (his favorite son who was presumed dead for 22 years) is still alive and living in Egypt’. The overwhelming sudden joy would have been proven too much and would have killed him. Serach presented it in a delicate, clever gradual way in which Yaacov was able to comprehend without the shocking affect.

The Gemarah (Sotah13a) states that soon after Yaacov’s death, seventeen years later, when Yaacov’s sons were taking his body to the Cave of Machpela for burial, a confrontation took place between his sons and his evil brother Eisav. Eisav came and protested that the plot of land (Cave of Machpela) belonged to him. A debate ensued and it was decided that one of the brothers would return to Egypt and retrieve the deed to show that Yaacov indeed owned the property.

A deaf grandson Chushim (son of Naftali) wondered, why the cause of the delay? When they communicated with him, he exclaimed ‘What? Our grandfather will lie in degradation until the deed is brought?’ whereupon he immediately killed Eisav.

Why was Chushim, a grandson, more concerned about Yaacov’s honor than Yaacov’s own sons? Rav Chaim answers, all the brothers had been slowly drawn into the argument with Eisav, gradually dulling their sensitivity to their father’s shame. Chushim, being deaf, was completely unaware of the situation. When he realized the reason for the delay, he could not contain his anger and killed Eisav.

One has to be aware of the delicate nature of man. He has to approach situations gradually. Furthermore, man must be aware and use his most powerful tool ‘to speak’  properly by delivering news, whether good or bad, gradually, so the process of adapting should go smoothly and successfully.

Source of Tradition 
   spark plug

             At the beginning of this week’s parsha, we find Abraham busy arranging his wife Sarah’s funeral. Although the Bible is not a history book, it also does not show the emotional side of our forefathers either. However, through our traditions and our other sources that depict the human emotional side, we are able to feel the pulse of our ancestors. Such is the case of Abraham, in this difficult situation of the death of his beloved wife.

We learn from our sages that Abraham and Sarah were very close and showed tremendous respect for each other. They had a common goal and sought to accomplish it through their different personalities. Abraham was charismatic and outgoing, while Sarah’s virtue was modesty.

One should note that one of the most beautiful experiences of love for a Jew is the Friday night Shabbat table (if its performed correctly); and one of the traditions is for a husband to recite (sing) eshet chayil (woman of valor) in front of his wife. In this recitation, which is found in the last chapter of King Solomon’s Mishlai, it describes the virtue of the beloved wives of Israel. The sages and many commentaries are in unison that eshet chayil is based on the emotional eulogy in which Abraham presented at his wife Sarah’s funeral. As far as tradition goes this piut, (poem) goes back 4000 years to that emotional day when there wasn’t a dry-eyed person listening to Abraham express his love, one last time, for his wife.

The family is brought together Friday night, when the power of Shabbat focuses on bringing the family closer through love and respect, just as Abraham had for his wife Sarah.

Important Note Before Shabbat 
   parking ticket

            Did you know that if one lights Shabbat candles on a table, even after the candles are extinguished on the table upon which it was standing, the table cannot be moved until after Shabbat is over. The table is muktzah.

Muktzah items are those that are not allowed to be moved on Shabbat. It’s a rabbinical law created as a fence to prevent one from stumbling and violating Shabbat. These preventive measures are fences, which are essential to the survival and to our commitment of the commandment ‘keeping the Shabbat’.

I can understand why one can’t move the table while the candles are lit; the reason is, candles are more prone to be put out while moving and one might be tempted to light them again, therefore violating the Shabbat.

But why can’t one move the table after the candles are no longer lit? The answer is, the lit candles and the tables, which was muktzah during the period of bein hashmashot, are at a frozen state until after Shabbat.

Bein hashmashot is a time period between sunset and nightfall that many commentaries say has an unknown status of what day it belongs to. One can also reach tremendous spiritual heights during this period, especially Friday afternoon before Shabbat. If I may ask the readers, what is the most important prayer of the year? The answer is ‘Neilah’ on Yom Kippur, which is purposely said during bein hashmashot. The reason being is that during bein hashmashot on Friday is when Adam and Eve, the first man and woman, sinned. Therefore, we try to fix their mistake. Apparently, if one notices that on many occasions, there is friction between a husband and wife during this time. One has to rectify and be extra careful and to know that he should try to withstand any hardships at bein hashmashot, and then he will reap tremendous rewards. Perhaps this is why the prayer eshet chayil (woman of valor) is said Friday night at the Shabbat table after bein hashmashot, after the uncomfortable nature Adam and Eve had towards one another. Eshet chayil is reconciliation and is to reaffirm the commitment of husband and wife.

Rabbi Akiva Tatz mentions that when one passes on to the next world, there is an unknown status between life and death where the person experiences nothing but darkness. During this period, the evil powers tries to convince the individual, “you see there is nothing here; all this talk about life after death and heaven is all nonsense. It was just a farce that the Rabbis wanted you to believe.” If one believes and is convinced this is true, he loses everything; he loses it all. His status, which consists of his thoughts and belief at that moment, is frozen for eternity. He could have been a big tzadik all his life, but lose it all at that crucial moment of in-between. This is the reason that it’s recommended for a loved one to say shema yisrael when one leaves the world. The soul is in a scared and confused state; it needs strength from any source it can get.

We tend to rush and lose our cool trying to get all things done before Shabbat. Please use caution during this period.

Sincerely,
Rabbi Avi Matmon
Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Bo


“I DON’T WANT TO OFFEND YOUR-MAJESTY, YOUR-HIGHNESS, BUT YOUR FIRST BORN BOYS WILL DIETONIGHT” said Moshe to Pharaoh.

That’s a weird way to address a king: respect and a fist in the mouth!  Before the tenth plague, Moshe informs Pharaoh that all of his servants will be looking for Moshe begging him to stop the plague. Turns out, it was actually Pharaoh himself who, in the middle of the night, in pajamas, went door to door trying to find Moshe to beg that he and the Israelites should leave.

Moshe was very accurate and meticulous when speaking to Pharaoh. If so, why wasn’t he more accurate by proclaiming that indeed it would be Pharaoh himself who will be parading in his nightly attire seeking him?

Moshe acted properly in treating the king with respect and not hurting an authoritative figure. By pointing a finger at Pharaoh and telling him “this will happen to you” is a gross lack of respect.

RESPECT?!-EXCUSE ME CHABIBI! Pharaoh was a RASHA! He tortured and enslaved the Jews; he ordered the execution of Jewish babies! You want to give this monster respect?! On the contrary, Pharaoh should be dragged around town and humiliated!!

However, the Torah is trying to teach us about respecting authority, any authority. There has to be respect for the leaders, teachers and parents. This is a very hard and foreign concept for us Americans to fathom, as we live in a democratic society where every time a politician slips, we scream “throw the bum out”!

The National Rifle Association has taken an unfathomable position after the Newtown tragedy, in which twenty six people, mostly children, were killed; they are in favor of guns. Truth be told, the NRA represents the epitome of democracy. The NRA was created as the result of the second amendment which permitted guns to be possessed. This was to ensure that no government will turn tyranny; hence there should be an armed militia accessible, just in case.  Initially, this seems very appropriate. However, although there are plenty of positives to a democratic system, all of them are at the expense of the watering down of respect for authoritative figures.

The Torah wants to emphasize the importance of having respect for authority; a king, a president, no matter how much the late show hosts poke fun of them. They represent the people and they enforce order in society. G-d loves an orderly society, even at the expense of believing in Him.

First Portion: * Even Pharaoh’s advisers suggested that he release the Israelites, but he refused. Unfortunately, the advisers still followed his command. History often repeats itself; this is the first of many times where “they just followed orders” from their evil leader. One cannot do that; opposition groups should have arose if they thought Pharaoh was wrong; grass roots should have begun to make themselves known. However, they didn’t, and therefore the Egyptian nation as a whole was responsible for their actions, just as Pharaoh was.

* Moshe and Aharon threaten to bring another plague, locusts.

* Pharaoh’s response was to let just the men go, and leave the women and children. Moshe obviously refused, setting the stage for the locusts.

Second Portion: * Pharaoh runs to find Moshe to beg him to stop the plague, stating, “I have sinned to G-d”. Sounds sincere, no?! Ha! Only a short time later, Pharaoh returns to his stance of refusal to let them go.

* Moshe brought upon Egypt the next plague, darkness, through the command of G-d.

* Many of the Israelites who were not following in the way of G-d perished in this plague. The reason why G-d chose this particular plague is because He did not want the Egyptians to say, “We’re not the only ones being punished”. By the time the Egyptians arose from the darkness, those Jews were already buried.

Third Portion: * Pharaoh said to Moshe, “You can leave, but your flock and cattle shall remain”. Moshe retorted back, “We will leave with all we have”.

* G-d made it so that the Jews were able to take gold, silver, and clothing from the Egyptians. The Egyptians themselves honored the requests of the Israelites to “lend them” gold, silver etc.

Fourth Portion: * G-d informs Moshe of the last plague, death of the Egyptian firstborn children.

* G-d instructs Moshe and Aharon how to fulfill the first commandment of the Torah. G-d informs them starting with “This month, I will implement a calendar system”. The calendar is based on the moon and is regulated by the sun. The time span between one new moon and the next is 29 days, 12 hours, 44 minutes, and 3 ½ seconds. Since a month has to be composed of complete days, the months alternate between 29 and 30 days. So a 12-month year contains 354 days, as opposed to 365 days in a solar year. In order to make up the eleven day difference which, after many years, will cause a problem because Nissan, a spring month (Pesach has to be in the spring), will fall out in the winter. Therefore, the Torah instituted a leap year, which adds a 13th month (Adar ll) to the year, seven times every nineteen years. This will ensure that Pesach will fall out in the springtime each year.

* The Seder night of Pesach, which we still commemorate today, is a very powerful night because that was when G-d showed tremendous mercy on our ancestors many years ago. On that night, back then, we were instructed to perform the Pesach offering, which consists of roasting a lamb or sheep (these animals were sacred and were the Egyptian gods, by slaughtering them, it’s a slap in the face to the Egyptians). The blood from the offering was to be painted on the doorpost. While we were eating the Pesach offering in our homes, G-d skipped over our houses. Only the Egyptians were struck when He killed the firstborns.

* We are introduced in this portion as to how to perform our obligation on the holiday of Pesach.

Fifth Portion: * Interestingly, the Israelites were commanded not leave their homes on the night of the death of the firstborns of the Egyptians, “or else the angel of death will smite you too.”  One must ask, wasn’t it understood that G-d himself would kill the Egyptian firstborns? Still, the angel was specifically instructed to kill any Jews who left their homes. We learn an important lesson; one is not permitted to feel good in watching their enemy being tortured or killed. Although the Egyptians tortured the Jews, G-d still made sure not to let them see what was done to the Egyptians.

Sixth Portion: * Pharaoh ran out in his pajamas in the middle of the night to find Moshe and begged him to stop the plagues and to leave. He said the whole Jewish nation should leave.

*There were 600,000 men between the ages of 20 and 60 who left Egypt.

*In their haste, they left while the bread did not finish baking. This bread is called matzoh.

*The Jews were in exile 210 years.

Seventh Portion: * We conclude the Parsha with two passages, one is about the firstborn and the other is teaching the future generations. As we got prepared to leave Egypt, we were in essence graduating to a “nation” status. The narrative is directing us from slave status to a bright future where, now, the father of the household has a say and influence, and will be able to pass down the tradition of the gift that was given by G-d – the Torah.