“A Cup of Coffee
&
A Quick Thought”
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Spark Of Jewish Experience
Vayishlach
December 8, 2011
12 Kislev, 5772 |
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Dear Friends,
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Parshat Vayishlach Highlights |
* After hearing Eisav gathered 400 hundred men en-route to kill him, Yaacov sent angels ahead to greet his brother and try to soften his stance – second portion.
* Yaacov put together an arrangement of gifts for his brother, Eisav. We learn here the importance of diplomatic negotiations in dealing with your foes.
* Yaacov fights with Eisav’s angel and is injured – third portion.
* Yaacov and Eisav meet – fourth portion.
* Eisav goes home to the land of Seir.
* Yaacov and his family arrive in Shechem – fifth portion
* Yaacov’s daughter Dina is raped by Shechem.
* Shimon and Levi, 2 of the 12 sons of Yaacov, trick Shechem and the entire town by convincing them we will intermarry with you only after the males in the city get circumcised. On the third day since the communal circumcisions, Shimon and Levi came and killed all the males in the town of Shechem. They also rescued their sister, Dina.
* G-d said to Yaacov go to Bet El and make me an altar (place where Yaacov had his dream).
* G-d gave an additional name to Yaacov, Israel – sixth portion.
* Rachel gives birth to Benyamin completing the 12 tribes, and soon after dies.
* Rachel is buried on the way in Bet Lechem.
* Isaac dies, and both his sons, Yaacov and Eisav, bury him.
* Genealogy of Eisav is being told over – seventh portion.
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Parshat Vayishlach – Public Enemy #1 |
The genealogy of Eisav’s children is being spelled out at the end of parshas Vayishlach. There is a very interesting story involving the grandmother of PUBLIC ENEMY #1 which the Jews despise the most, Amalek. Amalek, who was Eisav’s grandson and his descendant, have given the Jews the most pain and sorrow from all our foes. What’s the reason our confrontations with him were always so bitter? What’s the reason when we say Amalek or Haman (descendant of Amalek) in synagogue; we stamp our feet out of disgust? Let’s probe into the root of Amalek and why he came to this world.
Timna, the mother of Amalek, was the mistress of Elifas, the son of Eisav. One may find it odd that she was a concubine considering she was the daughter of a king and the sister of Liytan, a prominent figure. Apparently, she was under the strong belief that ‘I’d rather be a mistress to this nation than a queen to a different nation’. She was referring to Avraham and his children. In fact, she made her overtures to be the wife of Avraham, Isaac, and Yaacov but was rejected by all three; our forefathers did not accept her. So she settled for Elifas. Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz, in which this dvar Torah is based from, says the bitterness of being rejected by our ancestors became ingrained and transformed to Timna’s future genealogy. The rage Amalek has towards us stems from jealousy of Timna, being tossed away and not accepted. Rav Chaim asks ‘how can that be? It’s out of character of the persona and philosophy of Avraham. The great Avraham, whose teachings of G-d and the notion of bringing people back was his virtue. He was an expert of bringing people closer to G-d, to convert everybody and to take them under the wing of glory. The self-sacrifice he gave towards outreach is one of astonishment, and yet he turns and rejects an individual soul who understands the prominence and value of his family, and is willing to give up so much to be a part of it. One can even say it’s very commendable on her part. Why didn’t they accept Timna?
Timna wasn’t accepted because she wasn’t worthy to be under the clouds of glory. Our ancestors saw through prophecy that she and her descendants carry in their genes very bad traits, and our fathers wanted no part of it.
When the Israelites crossed the sea after G-d made it split, all the nations heard, saw, and trembled the miracles G-d performed for them. The world was in awe. The Jews were placed on a pedestal, untouched; they were considered a holy nation, G-d’s nation. However, one nation waged war against the Israelites, Amalek. Up until that point, the world saw through the miracles, the power and goodness of G-d. Apparently, there was a momentum of spirituality among the nations resulting from those monumental events. Amalek ruined all this.
Rashi (commentary on the Chumash) gives a memorable example of the first person jumping in a hot pool while the others were apprehensive. But the pool became cooler as soon as the first person jumped, making it approachable.
Similarly, we find the giant Og making fun of Avraham and Sarah’s newborn, Isaac, for being too small. It was the first baby in the crib,’ What is this little thing?’ It was such a miracle and a tremendous credit to G-d giving a gift to this old couple that were the ambassadors of G-d and represented Him out in the open. If there was any time in history to boast of the concept of ‘the good gets blessed’, it’s here. But Og minimized the miracle and dulled the momentum of spirituality.
Apparently, by waging war against the Jews, proved that our fathers were right in not taking Timna under the wings of glory. While other nations saw and felt G-d’s power and spirituality after the splitting of the sea, it seemed like Amalek was desensitized to G-d and spirituality; they weren’t moved, didn’t faze them one bit. They weren’t able, and perhaps didn’t have it in them to feel the spirituality.
Although our forefathers were right in their decision about Timna, one has to be a little bit gentler on how to reject. Rav Chaim teaches us the diplomatic game has to be enforced by pushing them out with the left hand and shaking their hands with the right; cordial but curt or cruddier; kick them from behind with a smile. We often have to act in such away in our workplace for our self-preservation. It was crucial not to let Timna in, for if she was accepted, it would have compromised our development individually and as a nation, but we have to be delicate in saying you can’t come in.
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What Is Your Favorite Season? |
After returning back from the United States, an Israeli was asked how he liked his trip to New York. His response was he hated it. “There are four seasons there”. But there are four seasons everywhere”, he was told. He retorted back, “You’re right, but in New York there are four seasons in one day.”
My son recently wrote an essay about autumn. He described the leaves on the trees turning colors and having fun stepping on a sea of leaves that have fallen resulting in a crunching sound. My boy mentioned about the wonderful smell the leaves give out while lying on the ground, especially after a rainfall. Many years ago, well, not so many, I too wrote a similar essay when I was just about my son’s age. This treat of autumn is something many New Yorkers don’t appreciate. A few years ago I had the pleasure of walking with a fellow who wasn’t from this country that had pointed out the beauty of autumn. He mentioned, in envy, he doesn’t experience the beauty of autumn where he comes from. Apparently, I was a little embarrassed because it seemed like he observed in detail the change of seasons with appreciation while I took it for granted.
The Mesilat Yesharim compares us to horses that ride in a very quick pace without realizing where they pass. They don’t move their head; they just ride straight without realizing the beautiful countryside they’re passing. We have to stop and to see the beauty that G-d has placed us in and appreciate details of the flowery spring, the greenery of summer, snowy winters, and cooling fall. We should not let the rat race with its pressure and stress dictate and dominate our lives. That kind of New York pressure desensitizes us where we miss out on life.
Every December 4th, (this year in New York, December 5th because of the leap year next year), we change the format of the Amida prayer, (the silent prayer that we stand at a standstill which we say 3 times a day), due to the change of seasons, by reciting ‘v’ten tal umatar lebracha, making a request that He give us rain. It is made only when rain is actually needed in an agricultural cycle. In Israel, however, rain is needed in early fall, so the recitation therefore begins on 7 Cheshvan, much earlier than elsewhere. (This is the daily bracha for parnassa – making a good livelihood).
(We had discussed in previous newsletters the importance of saying prayers as accurately as possible. One might argue ‘it’s the thought that counts’ and there is no need for such over zealous meticulousness. However, this is not so, (please refer to previous ‘coffee and a thought).
What happens when an American (Jew) travels to Israel arriving at the end of November or an Israeli landing in New York at the same time? Do they alter their prayers to accommodate the guest environment or do they follow what they do at home?
Rav Eliyahu Ben Haim mentions that the only time a person changes his prayer for v’ten tal umatar lebracha is when he is the shaliach tzibur (chazzan) for his host country. Otherwise, he goes by what he says back home.
A change of season is important because it breaks up the monotony and it provides a well-needed refreshing look and feel so we can appreciate G-d and the world. Therefore, we can give the ultimate thanks.
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Do You Take Care of Yourself? |
For the most part, I write the last article of this newsletter Tuesday night after my lecture and shiur. However, tonight, Tuesday, I missed giving my lecture and shiur because I wasn’t feeling well (sponsors – beware – your dedication will be announced before the shiur next week). Apparently, that’s the reason I’m writing earlier than usual. I love giving the shiur, it’s a nice guy environment, and it pained me to miss it. My wife blames me (like many wives blame their husbands) for not giving it due to getting sick because I don’t take care of myself, or so she says. Although I do keep odd hours and I don’t sleep much at night or eat at the proper times, but for her to make that assessment is unfair.
My great-grandfather would always say, “Watch your health very much very much (meod meod).” Well, the actual quote (Devarim 4:16) has only ‘one’ very much, but I guess he wanted to make his point clear. Apparently, by having it written in the Torah puts a more stringent concern on all of us (violating Torah law – medeorisa is harsher then rabbinical law).
Even more so, my father always said you cannot talk while eating fish because it’s a battle. Let’s take those wise words a step further. My friend, Rabbi Uri Sklaar, says eating fish is a battle even without talking. Now let’s take it even further; according to the Shulchan Aruch (the book of laws), one cannot talk while you eat (besides fish) because it might go down the wrong pipe. Now, how many of us are strict about that one?
I remember taking a course in college where at one point they taught you the proper technique on how to interview for a job; the primary concern is proper etiquette at a restaurant. Now remember, according to Jewish law, you cannot answer a question until you swallow the food (it is advisable not to order peanut butter).
However, there are those that are extremists when it comes to health. One should take note that you cannot add or subtract from the Torah; don’t be such a tzaddik. It’s okay; you can cheat a little on the midnight snacks. So I guess one should not deprive the kids of potato chips by substituting raisins or carrots. (My wife will give me an earful for that one.)
Questions to ponder: does one have to go organic to be healthy? Are you violating the law by doing too much? Or maybe one is violating by not having organic products or by not doing enough?
Regardless, one should keep in mind that the Torah does take health and taking care of yourself very seriously, but defining the letter of the law is the question. Ask your local Rabbi or nutritionist for advice.
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Sincerely,
Rabbi Avi Matmon
Spark of Jewish Experience
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