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WHAT DOES THE MESSAGE OF PESACH HAVE TO DO WITH MY LIFE TODAY?

April 18, 2016 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s, Yonossan Zweig, Berrel Wein, Yossi bilus, Akiva Tatz, Asher Hurzberg, Ilan Feder

Does the message of Pesach have any relevance in today’s day and age?

Why is the Halach Ma’anya written in Aramaic?

When is the best time to say Halach Ma’anya?

How do we answer the question that the four sons ask?

The much anticipated, much glorified, and if you’re a housewife (or for that matter in today’s day and age houseman) somewhat scary holiday is at our threshold. Pesach! Such wonderful childhood memories invoke yours truly of this glorious holiday. I must say my parent did a fine job; the singing, the rituals, the education, the entertainment, the tradition, the food! A package deal is what my parents so artfully delivered to us every Pesach. We didn’t go away like most families. The home always had a very intimate flavor that naturally glorified the holiday so much more than any vacation package in Florida could offer.

Pesach marks the uniqueness of the Jewish people – a people delivered from centuries of bondage through miraculous Heavenly intervention. One of the main functions of Pesach is to connect us to an event that occurred millennia ago in a distant land.

However, if one doesn’t have the fond child memories, the natural inclination of people is to feel disconnected to that event. Even if there were memories, they may be “lukewarm”, so to speak, so how can one muster the stamina to sit through an entire Seder? How much juice is left in the clown outfit that the father wears, the Uncle Moishe type Seders with lots of singing, or as what my son’s past Pre-1A Rebbi who suggested, having little plastic frogs and use small super balls for the plagues to stimulate the interest in the kids? Even the classic traditions like hitting each other with scallions during the recitation of “Dayenu” can grow “stale” over time. There are some who even march around the table carrying a sack of cloths as if they left Egypt. All these props are childish but loads of fun and carry much great memories. Nevertheless, is it enough to keep the interest? Life is such that kids grow up, Teens grow up and need more sophisticated stimulation. They start asking serious question. What do we do then? This is implicit in the questions raised in the section of the Hagadah devoted to the four sons. Their basic question is: “What is the relevance of this long-ago event to me?” And this has remained the basic question in all of Jewish life throughout the ages.z

The enormous number of Jews who are completely disconnected from their faith and their people, from their homeland of Israel and from the values and observances of Torah, testifies to the intensity of the difficulty posed by this question. They say “If the Exodus from Egypt does not speak to me, then the rest of Judaism is pretty immaterial to me as well.”

Perhaps, one can take a look at some cues in the Hagadah where one can seek a valuable lesson and the answer to that age old question of “What’s the relevance!?”

As we begin the Maggid – the telling over of the story of our history section of the Seder, we recite the very peculiar paragraph of Halach Ma’anya. Although it is a unique moment for every individual sitting at the Seder who each actually have their own turn to simultaneously say the proclamation and to physically hold the Matzahs, surprisingly enough, the recitation is not in Hebrew. Why do we recite it in Aramaic? It is a language no one understands!!

Secondly, one of the messages in the short paragraph is that we invite whoever is hungry to come and eat – “kol dichfin yesei v’yeichol”, and whoever requires a place to eat Korban Pesach to come and partake – “kol ditzrich yesei v’yifsach”. So, aside from the language issue, this invitation is not only presented at the wrong time, for Kiddush has already been recited and the meal has already begun, but it’s in the wrong place as well, for it is issued in the privacy of our own homes. If we want to invite people, perhaps we should recite the proclamation out on the street and catch some of the passersby where then we’ll invite them in. Furthermore, to partake in the Korban Pesach one had to be a member of the group from the time the Korban was slaughtered earlier in the day. What purpose do this invitation serve?

WHY LAVAN?

One of the conversations which we discuss at the start is about the individual “Lavan HaArami” the brother and no-goodnik of our sacred matriarch Rivka. Why start with him, out of all people, when we have some of the most colorful characters in history in our past? Purim was just a few weeks ago. Let’s use Haman instead!

The Torah describes Lavan as a “ramai” – trickster.” The entire region was known for this quality; the Hebrew letters of the word “Aram” when rearranged spell the Hebrew word “ramai”. A ramai is not the same as a “ganav” – “thief”. A thief maintains no pretenses that his actions are in the victim’s best interest. A ramai is a confidence man, possessing the ability to deceive the victim into believing that he is gaining from the actions of the ramai. It is only later that the victim realizes that he has been victimized. The ability to perpetrate such a crime requires the ramai to know exactly what the victim is thinking, to see the victim’s perspective. He has to be an expert on human psychology. It’s a sensitivity issue that the ramai has to proficient in. This quality of sensitivity can be utilized in a positive manner. The greatest “chesed” – “acts of kindness” are performed by an individual who is sensitive to the needs of the recipient.

One of our forefather Avraham, the first Jew, greatest achievements is when he hosted the three angels. It was tremendous feat of kindness. It just so happens that the pinnacle of chesed incident, the “hosting the three angels” occurred on Pesach. Interestingly, a year later on the very day of Pesach G-d destroyed the city of S’dom and Amora (Sodom and Gomorra to use the English names for them). These two cities represented the antithesis of chesed.

A Jew essence is built on the philosophy of chesed this was passed down from Avraham. The importance of the virtue of kindness is immeasurable. We find that our Patriarch Avraham made it his number one priority by sending his trusted servant Eliezer to find his beloved son a wife. The prime directive is that she should possess is the quality of chesed.

Incredibly, with the negative environment surrounding her it seemed miraculous that Rivka emerged as quintessence fit for Avraham’s family of chesed and for his heir apparent, his son Yitzchak.

How can that happen? How did Avraham know that a treasure lies among the swamps? The mainstream commentary, Rashi, sites that the Torah in its repetition of where Rivka came from praises her by noting that although she had been brought up in such adverse surroundings, she was not influenced by the actions of the wicked. Generally, Rashi’s comment is understood to mean that in spite of her environment she was able to maintain her righteousness. Analyzing the Midrash we see however that this cannot be the entire meaning of the message, for the Midrash from which Rashi derives his comment cites the verse in King Shlomo’s Shir Hashirim to describe Rivka’s qualities “kashoshana bein hachochim” – “like a rose among the thorns.” If the intent of the Midrash is to point out that Rivka retained her righteousness in the face of adversity, then the thorns would represent the adversity. This analogy is difficult for the rose does not thrive in spite of the thorns, rather because of the thorns that protect it and allow it to thrive. What then is the message of the verse?

Sensitivity is an important trait in elevating ourselves in developing relations with G-d and our fellow man. The greatest “chesed” – “acts of kindness” are performed by an individual who is sensitive to the needs of the recipient. Although Aram was notorious for their trickery, Avraham wanted a wife for Yitzchak who would possess this same sensitivity that a Lavan uses for his trickery, when performing kindness. It was this genetic quality that Avraham wanted to infuse into Klal Yisroel, and it was this quality that Eliezer was looking for when testing Rivka. This is the message of the Midrash; the thorns reflect the quality of the “ramai” by which Rivka was surrounded, but which enabled her to achieve the great levels of chesed of which only she was able. She had the gift of sensitivity as did her brother. However she used it for kindness and good while her brother used it for trickery and evil.

Many of us are proud to host guest on Shabbat and Holidays. We have to understand that a guest or for that matter a family member is very special on Pesach, for the objective is to perform for them a mitzvah of the highest level, which is the section in the Seder called “Maggid”. The Pesach Seder is a celebration of our redemption and we are all guests of honor. To prevent the guests from feeling beholden to the “Baal Habayit” (host) which would hinder, and repress their involvement and participation in the evening, we begin the Seder by allowing the guests to invite others. The Talmud states “ein oreyach machnis oreyach” – “a guest is not permitted to invite other guests.” However, a guest of honor has the right to invite whomever he chooses. The message we are relaying to all the participants is they are not merely guests obligated to the homeowner. Rather, they are all guests of honor, celebrating their own redemption. It is imperative that all the guests feel comfortable, for they have to speak freely and engage in the conversations of the evening to fulfill the mitzvah of “Tzipur Yetzias Mitzrayim” – Maggid. In the same vein, the Tosafot Yom Tov had a custom to spill wine on the clean tablecloth so that the guests would feel at ease. The purpose of the invitation is for the guests already assembled, not for those who are absent.

Rashi explains the term “chesed” as an Aramaic word meaning “shame”. However, in Hebrew “chesed” means “kindness”, a term with positive connotations. When a person does chesed he receives fulfillment from the act, while the recipient feels shame. The Hebrew and Aramaic meanings are therefore not contrary, but, in fact, complementary. The Hebrew translation focuses on the perspective of the giver while the Aramaic translation focuses on the perspective of the recipient. By using the Aramaic word “chesed”, the Torah is teaching us that when we do chesed, we should be SENSITIVE to the recipient’s shame. This way, we will do chesed in a manner which will diminish the recipient’s shame. It is therefore appropriate to begin the Seder in Aramaic for this is the language that symbolizes the sensitivity of seeing the perspective of another.

The prime directive is to make the guest or family member feel as comfortable as possible so he’ll have the inner strength to “ask”. Much of the Seder is designed to sprout those feelings. One of the reasons we drink the four cups of wine is for that very reason. Everyone is born with a certain defense mechanism where he or she has to a certain degree a feeling that makes one self-conscious and unable to act in a relaxed and natural way. We just don’t disclose our deepest and darkest secrets to the world. It’s unbecoming. Wine, though, has the some element within to relieve ones inhibitions. We, depending how much is consumed, let our guard down when we drink wine. This is the optimal scenario at the Seder night for we are not afraid to ask questions; its designed that way. We have to be pro-active in conversation, speaking of course about Jewish or Torah topics. All of a sudden, everyone at the Seder is your friend. Wine brings unity. We just have to be careful not to drink a little too much, not to spill the beans. For this reason we are forbidden to drink with non-Jews. We have to realize our place and our commitment to G-d.

Aside from the sensitivity required of the host to give the participants the feeling that they are guests of honor, the very nature of Tzipur Yetzias Mitzrayim – the telling of the story requires seeing the perspective of another. The mitzvah must be performed “derech she’eilah uteshuvah” – “by question and answer”, i.e. the Socratic Method. The only way for such an approach to be effective is if the listener is sensitive to the questions being posed. Very often a person’s only interest is to make heard what he is thinking, and he does not address the question at all. The most important Jewish literary work after the Torah is the Talmud. The Talmud is also presented in the Socratic Method, question and answer. It is therefore most appropriate that the Talmud is written in Aramaic and in the region of Aram for this is the language and region that lends itself to seeing the perspective of others, crucial when attempting to respond to the queries and difficulties which are the basis of the Talmud. In other words, the Seder is all about questions. This is represented by the Four Sons.

So, what do we answer the Four Sons?

Incredibly the Hagadah is out of character answering the Rasha, Wicked Son. It is very negative to him. What happened to super-duper outreach? The Rasha is treated that way because he is negative. He asks a question but he doesn’t seem to seek an answer. Therefore his question is not a question, it’s a statement. Seemingly, he doesn’t want to listen. Even more so, the Rasha is making fun of it all. The Torah does not want have anything to do with scoffers and distractors. However the other sons are sincere about seeking an answer and should be approached differently.

Our fun ancient traditions, such as the scallions at the recitation of “Dayenu”, the sack on the shoulder, as well as our creative razzle dazzle new props of today, plastic frogs and so forth are right on the money in answering the question. Granted the Hagadah has the answers describing our illustrious past and describing some of our ancestor’s pain and triumph, however, frankly I’ve been in this business many years and pardon me if I’m a little bold when I say there are more Jews returning to Judaism after spending a Shabbat meal and experiencing the warmth of a family then an intellectual debate whether G-d exist.

We are human and not perfect. You, the host, may not have all the all answers to the questions but it’s irrelevant for the true answer lies with the kindness, warmth and sensitivity. That’s the answer they want to hear. Then they will hear the Exodus, the Matzah speak to them with all the traditions and all its glory.

The Power of Publicity – Displaying a Kiddush Hashem

March 23, 2016 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of

Rabbi’s Yissachar Frand, Yossi Bilius

“WILL YOU WEAR THIS IN PUBLIC”

I once asked a friend why he doesn’t wear a kippa. After all, I argued, you keep Shabbat, kashrut and the basic mitzvot. He answered “I don’t want to be scrutinized for everything I do. If I don’t have the kippa on my head, I can do whatever I want, wherever I want and whenever I want to”. In other word he is relinquishing responsibilities. That is, he is relinquishing the responsibilities of being a Jew.

Is he correct? Should we hide our Jewishness or should we display it? Of course not! We are the chosen people and have a task to show and teach the world G-dly concepts. A study was taken a number of years ago as to which nation is most frequently displayed on the front page stories of the New York Times, a leading national news circulation. With the exception of the United States, Israel and Jewish related stories came in number two after US. We are scrutinized to no end, even though we don’t ask for it. Why? Because we are Jews. So if we are in the limelight any way, why don’t we control how we are perceived; it might benefit us to act like the fine role models we are supposed to be.

Rav Yaakov Kaminetsky zt”l recounted that when he was a Rabbi in Lithuania before World War 2, he was asked a question by a resident of his community. The man had purchased stamps from the local post office, and had received more stamps that he had paid for. For such a poor man, the extra stamps were no trifle matter. Nonetheless, Rav Kaminetsky suspected that perhaps the postal clerk was testing the rabbi. This suspicion was confirmed a short time later when the clerk gave him too much change. The rabbi returned the extra money. Many years after the Nazis came and destroyed the community, the rabbi heard that this clerk had saved many Jews, testifying that he tested everybody to assess their honesty, the only trustworthy people were the Jews! This teaches us that in addition to the obligation to be honest and avoid thievery, a Jew must be extra vigilant to bring about a Kiddush Hashem.

The Gemara [Bava Metziah 87a] describes that Avraham made a party to mark the occasion of the weaning of Yitzchak, to which he invited all the great men of the generation. Avraham Avinu was not just a private citizen. He was society’s primary proponent of monotheism. He rejected the pagan idols of the rest of the world and proclaimed the existence of a Master of the Universe.

Avraham Avinu wanted to sanctify the Name of G-d (Kiddush Hashem) and publicize the great miracle that G-d did for him. Avraham made this big celebration for just that purpose, but the cynics that were sitting there were having a field day. They joked that Yitzchak could not possibly be Avraham’s child. Sarah must have become pregnant from Avimelech. “She lived many decades with Avraham and had not become pregnant from him. ” We all know how it goes: A roll of the eyes, a twist of the nose, a mocking smile.

Even though Avraham fathered a child with Hagar, cynicism does not need to be precise or accurate. The effect of a “one-liner” is basically that of a pin. In just one moment, the balloon bursts. The “press” will write it up. The fact that anyone with intelligence who thinks about this for 30 seconds will recognize it as nonsense is irrelevant. The damage has already been done. Such is the power of leitzanut – mockery.

In response, G-d made a miracle, and made Yitzchak’s face look exactly like Avraham’s. Why did G-d respond in such a miraculous fashion to counteract this false type of mocking?

Who cares what these idiots say. One can simply say “I’m bigger then that. I don’t need to respond.” However, allowing this “momentary bursting” of the “balloon of Kiddush Hashem” would have defeated Avraham’s entire purpose in making the party. Thus, G-d needed to make a miracle to restore the inspirational nature of this festive meal.

We see a powerful example from this week’s Parsha. At the end of the Parsha, Bo, we have a Mitzvah to “Sanctify for Me (G-d) all the first born…” [Shemot 13:2] The first born of human beings and animals are holy to G-d. Why? Because G-d passed over Egypt on the night of Pesach and killed the first born of the Egyptians while sparing the first born of Israel. Is that a reason for the first born to be invested with a holiness which lasts until today?

The answer can be found is an interesting letter which Rabbi Yissachar Frand obtained from Rav Simcha Zissel from Kelm to Baron Rothschild. Rabbi Frand frequently quotes Rav Simcha Zissel. Baron Rothschild, as we all know, was a fantastically wealthy person who put his money to good use. He helped thousands and thousands of Jews. The Alter from Kelm writes the following to Baron Rothschild:

“I want to express my gratitude to you for all the generous and kind acts, which you have done for the entire Jewish people. Do not suspect, Heaven forbid, that I am coming with my own request for funds. However, in my humble opinion, I have to express my sense of gratitude for all that you have done to help the Jewish people. You are a person who stands before Kings and nevertheless you do not forget from where you came, and therefore maintain your support for Jewish needs. This is a great Sanctification of G-d’s Name and your reward is very great. Based on legal obligation (al pi din), I feel I have to express my thanks, honor, and appreciation to such an individual and to such a Sanctification of G-d’s name.”

Then the Alter from Kelm continues… “Think for a minute. The Halacha was to have been that the First Born was to have done the Service in the Temple. Had it not been for the sin of the Golden Calf, the Bechorim [first born] would have served G-d in the Beis HaMikdash, instead of the Kohanim. Why? Because they were passed over on that night of Pesach. As a result, until this very day there is sanctity of the first born. Not only does this sanctity apply to the first born of a human, but even to the first born of an animal.”

Rav Simcha Zissel asks, “Why? What did the Bechorim do, that made them holy?” They were merely passive. They were born first and therefore were saved by G-d, when He killed the first born. So what? What did the first born do that would have made them holier than a regular person, and fit for the Temple Service until this very day?

Rav Simcha Zissel answers, that they participated — albeit passively — in a Sanctification of G-d’s Name. When G-d, in his Own Glory came into Egypt and killed the Egyptian first born while sparing the Jewish first born, that was a tremendous Kiddush HaShem. That may have been the greatest manifestation of G-d’s power, up to that that point in history.

The first born, passively aided and abetted this great Kiddush HaShem. A person who even passively helps to create a Sanctification of G-d’s name, has a very great reward… to the extent that even today a first born is holy. Why? Because thousands of years ago the Bechorim ‘helped’ make a Kiddush HaShem.

“If this is the reward for a person who passively helps in a Kiddush Hashem, how can we begin to contemplate,” says the Alter from Kelm, “what the reward is of a person that actively goes and makes a Kiddush Hashem?”

“Therefore, you, Baron Rothschild, considering who you are and what you have done, have actively and publicly Sanctified G-d’s Name. Therefore, the greatest honor, respect and sense of Hakarat HaTov is due to you, merely by virtue of this fact.”

This is the lesson from the parsha of Bechor. Even passively helping create a Kiddush HaShem is a tremendous zechut [merit]. How much more of a Kiddush HaShem are we creating, when, in our daily lives, the way we act, the way we talk, the way we negotiate, the way we deal in business and the way we act among people –Jew and non-Jew alike — Sanctifies G-d’s Name?

If we use opportunities to go out of our way to make that Kiddush HaShem; if we say that extra “Good Morning,” if we are assiduously honest; if we go the extra mile to make that Kiddush Hashem so that they can say about us “You are my Servant, Israel, through whom I will be Glorified” [Yeshaya 49:3]; that they can say upon us “How pleasant are his ways” [Talmud Yoma 86a]; how beautiful are the ways of a religious Jew; then, as the Alter from Kelm writes, our reward will be very great.

There are times when one does a mitzvah to the fullest with the deepest commitment and through his action brings out Kiddush Hashem. I would like to illuminate such a case with a fellow named Rabbi Yosef Gutfarb. Rabbi Yosef was a New Yorker who moved to Jerusalem, Israel. He made an undertaking that he will always pray with a minyan.

We Jews pray 3 times a day and the optimal prayer conducted is with a minyan, which consists of at least 10 men present. Kadish may also only be recited in the presence of 10 men.

It can be quite challenging for one to get up early in the morning, in the heat or cold, and attend prayer services.

What is dedication?

What does it mean to pass a tough test?

If someone enters a freezing cold car at 6:15 in the morning, in the dead of winter, just to get to minyan; now that’s dedication!! Mankind has not figured out an inexpensive way to have the car heating system working so that it’s hot intently. No one looks forward for the car in the early morning experience. It is equally challenging to pry yourself from the middle of an important business transactions and attend the afternoon services. One can get really involved in their career. Furthermore, evening services are not any easier after a long and hard day at work. Nevertheless Rabbi Yosef soldiered his way through three decades, whether on business trips all around the world or any sort of unexpected pop-ups; he did not miss a beat of Kadish or one amen of a minyan!!…Talk about longevity!! Hmm, did someone give Rabbi Yosef the evil eye?

One night Rav Yosef came home after 3:00am and he had not yet prayed the evening services. Since in Shaufat the last minyan is at 11:00pm he calculated he would go to the next town over to search for a minyan. He was confident he would catch one in Zichron Moshe where there was a shul (Bet Hakneset) there, known to be a minyan factory. A minyan factory is a place where there are rooms throughout the building, where there is always a minyan at any time of day or night; how convenient is that?

Well mazal was a little difficult that night and to his dismay only one other person was waiting. “Do you think anybody else will come?” he inquisitively asked.

“Why are you saying Kadish? Are you an Avel-mourning the loss of a loved one?” the man questioned.

“No, I just made a commitment many years ago to not to miss a minyan” he replied. “How could this be? There is always a minyan here!” he nervously thought. What to do? What to do?

“I got it!!”

Rav Yosef then called a taxi company and asked if eight cabs can come to Zichron Moshe Shul (Bet Hakneset). “Only Israeli drivers” he added emphatically.

The dispatcher retorted back, “I don’t have eight taxies at three in the morning.”

“How many do you have?” Rav Yosef asked. “Only five” the dispatcher replied.

“Fine, send them quickly please: don’t forget only Israeli drivers!!”

Rav Yosef called another taxi company and asked for three Israeli drivers. The dispatcher said they would come in a few minutes.

The eight cabs all lined up and got out of their cars thinking they came at a tail end of some kind of party. To their dismay they found only Rabbi Yosef and the gentleman.

Rav Yosef told the drivers to turn off their cars and enter the shul “we’re going to pray the evening services, I need a minyan”. He explained his strange appeal by saying, “I haven’t missed a minyan in

years”.

The drivers, surprised but intrigued, obliged to the bizarre request.

They all could read Hebrew but not all were familiar with the protocol of tefila -prayer. Some had kippas-skull caps in their pockets, some in their glove compartment in their taxies.

After the prayer Rav Yosef took out his wallet to pay the drivers.

All the drivers, one by one refused to take the money. They were all stunned by the audacity of this American Jew who went to great lengths to fulfill his commitment for the sake of praying with a minyan. So impressed by the 15 minute prayer, many of the drivers thanked Rav Yosef for an uplifting spiritual experience. Many told him they have never had such a strong feeling when they prayed like this one time. Some said they haven’t prayed in a while and were honored to participate. They were all glad to have the opportunity to pray with such a person.

That’s a Kiddush Hashem and, more importantly, that’s the power of a Kiddush Hashem.

Intellect vs Emotions

This article was comprised using thoughts from Chidushay Halev by Rav Henoch Liebowitz z’l

On the morning of Rosh Hashanah, Rivka [Rebecca] went into the bedroom to wake her son and tell him it was time to get ready to go to the synagogue [Shul], to which he replied in a dull voice, “I’m not going.”
“Why not?” Rivka demanded. “I’ll give you two good reasons, Mother.” he said. “One, they don’t like me, and two, I don’t like them.” Rivka replied in an exasperated voice, “I’ll give you two good reasons why you must go to the synagogue. One, you’re 54 years old, and two, you’re the Rabbi.”
Rabbi’s are people too. No one is immune; they also can get sucked in to the emotions of their job.

If one knows a little American history. Henry Kissinger was the Secretary of State back in the 1970’s under President Richard Nixon. He was considered by many as a very smart man. There was a popular joke about emotions and intellect involving the smartest man of his time:

Three people were on an airplane: Henry Kissinger, a boy scout, and a Rabbi. They will find out that the plane is in distress and will crash shortly. There are only two parachutes!! Henry Kissinger grabs a parachute and jumps out of the plane. So, the Rabbi goes to the boy scout ‘take the parachute. Son, I’m a lot older than you. You have a long life ahead of you. Please take the parachute. The boy laughs ‘Don’t worry, Rabbi. There are two left .The smartest man in the world just took my knapsack.’

When situations are such that one is forced to make a decision with great deal of emotions involved, in this case facing life and death on the airplane, a greater amount mistakes will occur. The intellect has to have greater control over the emotions to have a good functional system.

Desire is another emotion that can be devastating, even when one has time on his side; it’s a slow kill. If the desire is strong enough, then chances are it’s not governed by intellect. One may think he’s rational but it’s the emotion that stems from the desire that’s talking. What’s that expression? Don’t confuse me with the facts, I made my decision.

Rashi said Pharaoh refused to be humbled before G-d (Shemot 10:3). When the Egyptians began to enslave the Jews, Pharaoh rationalized that we can really use them and gain from their productivity. However, G-d had other plans and Pharaoh realized himself it wasn’t beneficial to enslave them. His advisers warned him also Egypt will be lost if the enslavement of the Jews continues. Their powerful G-d will destroy us. Pharaoh who was considered very smart knew that these plagues will destroy his kingdom. Yet his ego didn’t allow him to let them go.
But how does one understand Pharaohs behavior? Apparently, it should be the opposite. If Pharaoh was so concerned about his Honor and protect his ego, he would have let the Jews out the first chance he had knowing he’s going to lose his status and wealth. There’s no comparison; it’s a no-brainer. What’s at stake? Pharaoh can lower his head and let them go and still maintain his kingdom and perhaps a good chance of being considered a superpower. Or he would hold firm and continue to enslave the Israelites and inevitably his army would be destroyed and Egypt will never ever gain the glorified position it holds and Pharaoh would be labeled a fool by the world. Let’s not overlook that he sinned in front of G-d and will be accounted for it after his life is over.

Why did he make such a decision? Isn’t it mind boggling?

Pharaohs inflated ego was making the decisions. This desire, which stems from the heart, overrides the intellect. No matter how logical and factual the emotions block out the intellect where even the smartest man in the world will not make a rational decision. Even if his advisors are begging him to let them go and the plague are causing devastation, Pharaoh will feel confident that it’s the right choice. It’s a scary thought, how many decisions people make based on desire; desire for honor and women.

People don’t realize that desire is an emotion because one can be seen as acting normal, however it influences us. When the desire is alleviated even briefly, one can realize the wrong decisions he has made and the time he wasted. The frightening aspect about desire even a most influential friend with sound advice may not be able to get through because his message will be blocked.

Jewish monarchy

February 11, 2016 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Baruch Dopelt, Yossi Bilius, Pinchas Winston, Asher Hurzberg and Dr. Abba Goldman

In our illustrious glorious past we’ve often yearned for the mashiach. When we were in grade school we had to recite that “we believe whole heartedly that Mashiach is coming”. Mashiach this and Mashiach that. There have been many songs sung, manypsalms read, There even was a period where many of our people were killed for they thought that time had come and were careless, where they’re usually very careful, in dealing with gentiles arousing their hostility and Anti-Semitism only to be disappointed with a false prophet.

How ironic it is then, the proud Jews that we are, with our glorious past, the beautiful temple both past and future, that the Mashiach signs in through an undignified manor. We would never write a Hollywood script like this. Here, there is no poor or rich young couple who loves each other, have a baby (Mashiach), is allergic to kryptonite, and can’t keep him etc. It’s quite different script. One cannot complain “this movie is predictable -same formula”.

Let us take a look at the relevant places in the Torah and perhaps, dig deep, learn some insights into the mashiach

This is where the Jewish monarch and the Mashiach comes from……..

Uncharacistaly, Yehuda, leader of the tribes visits a prostitute, who is his daughter-in law in disguise. The Sages, say that the cohabitation of Yehuda, Tamar, his daughter in law, resulted in the inception of the Mashiach……Go Figure!! (Please see highlight section for full synopsis)

One may ask, how can the Mashiach come in such a degrading way?

Wait there is more!

*The seed of the Mashiach was also implanted in a bazar way by Lott, Avrahams nephew, After the destruction of Sedom, Lott’s two surviving daughters believed that the world was destroyed. They devised a plan to seduce their father on back to back consecutive nights after getting him drunk where they will procreate and populate the world once again. Ruth, is a descendant of this union The oldest son/grandchild Moav is where Ruth, the grandmother of king David, comes from.

* Boaz, a widower, a leader and descendant of the tribe of Yehudah marries Ruth, the convert, a widow herself to the childless son of Elimelech, a descendant of Yehuda as well. The courtship was strange, Ruth appear that night on the threshing floor to be as close as possible to the fields at a critical time in the harvest. Niomi, her mother in law, instructs Ruth to uncover Boaz’s feet so as to wake him and set the process of “yibum” in motion. Pretty odd isn’t it. The union between Boaz and Ruth was in question for A Israelite is forbidden to marry from Moav. Boaz died the next morning after their wedding night and Ruth gave up her child to Niomi to raise.

*King David marries Bat-Sheva in one of the most controversial union in our history. Did he usher Bat Sheva’s husband to the battlefield in what was presumably a death wish? The marriage between David and Bat-Sheva produced King Shlomo

This is our royal past?

In our current mindset or Western mentality we, perhaps, will entertain the thought of the Mashiach having that kind of introduction for we have grown accustom to a very promiscuous nature. The media has etched in our minds the kind of sexual provocation daily. Car commercials, game shows and even real estate ads come with a door prize and a smiley attractive female or male model. Television, no matter how PG it is full of sexual innuendos. Let’s not forget the advancement of the internet….GOODNESS GRACIOUS!!

Furthermore, as we Jews moved around the world we are constantly reminded through our neighbors about their immodest appetite way of life. We were the only Jews living on the block, in my childhood home in Rego Park. It was a predominantly Irish neighborhood and it was difficult to stay focused even as a very young Yeshiva grade school student with the immodest dress of my non-Jewish neighbors. What’s an orthodox boy doing living in this part of the world?

Interestingly, if one notices our biggest test growing up before entering our young adult, where then we are introduced to inflated egos, pursuit of money, keeping religion, is to watch our brit. There is a tremendous insurgence or wave of desire where hormones are flying uncontrollably when entering the teenage years.

This is our mundane life of today where the western culture has a tremendous influence. However, why has the Torah have to introduce the Jewish monarch and future Mashiash in a degrading way. Golden Yerushalayim and its purity should be left alone. Why drag it to such shmutz?

Furthermore, why is the topic of Erva- promiscuity associated with the kingdom. Why not murder? Jealousy?

Lets examine an aspect of brit milah where then perhaps we might understand the topic of mashiach a little more clearer.

Adam HaRishon was created circumcised, as it says, “God created man in His image …” (Bereishis 2:5). Avot d’Rav Nossan 2:5

Rav Yitzchak said, [Adam] caused his foreskin to be extended [and cover his circumcision]. Sanhedrin 38b

Interestingly, this is what the Greek Jews were a custom to do in the time of Chanukah. They were ashamed that they were different then the Goyim. The sexual revolution was influencing the world….sounds familiar. It was custom to remove your cloths entirely in many social functions. The Greeks believed in exposing the beautiful body. However the Jews, because of their brit had a different look, were ashamed.

The Greeks put a spiritual barrier between the Jews and their G-d. In Hebrew the growth of foreskin is called Orlah. This was the mistake of Adam. For, whether we are talking about “Orlat HaLeiv” (uncircumcised heart), “Orel S’fataim “(uncircumcised lips), or “Orlah” from a tree (fruits of the third year), the word Orlah always implies a spiritual “barrier” between man and God which has to be removed.

There are two aspects of the mitzvah referred to in the verse. Firstly, Milah is a sign of the covenant between Avraham and God; secondly, Milah is to take place on the eighth day from birth. We should take note of the point in the Parsha at which the Mitzvah is commanded after Avraham’s successful routing of the Canaanite kings. It’s no coincident that saving Lott, his nephew, who holds the seed for part of the Mashiach, is a precursor for brit milah.

When Avraham placed his faith in G-d for his physical sustenance, he demonstrated his unwavering commitment to live above nature. As a result, he was provided with the means to remove all the Orlos Adam’s mistake had brought to mankind. This is the Bris Milah which is performed on the eighth day (eight always symbolizes the spiritual, supernatural realm, as we see through Chanukah as well).

Why was Bris Milah so important to history? As the following reveals, it is the source of Malchut (of kingship), and therefore, the Final Redemption.

And Yosef said to his brothers, ” ‘Please come near to me,’ and they came near to him and he said . . .” (Bereishis 45:4). Why did he call them if they were already next to him? Because when he told them, “I am Yosef your brother” (Ibid.), they were in shock to see his royal position. He told them that his royalty was a direct result of this. (Zohar 1:93b)

What was Yosef referring to? The Zohar explains:

” ‘Please come near to me,’ and they came near to him”: He showed them that he upheld Bris Milah, saying, “By keeping this intact, I was able to attain royal status.” From here we learn that whomever keeps this sign intact will merit royalty. (Ibid.)

In other words, Yosef was saying that his royal status had been conferred upon him by Heaven for having resisted the advances of his master’s wife, Aishet Potiphar. Such intimacy would have been forbidden to him, and though he had been tempted at the time, in the end he had overcome his yetzer hara and had run out of the house, risking her vicious retribution that followed.

However, the Zohar is not finished yet, and backs up its statement with the following:

From where else do we know this? From Boaz, as it says, “As Hashem lives, lie down until the morning” (Rus3:13). His evil inclination was enticing him, so he made this oath to keep his bris intact. (Ibid.)

In other words, while he was secluded with Ruth, he desired her then. However, intimacy with her then was improper, and therefore he made the oath to safeguard himself against a sinful relationship. If she was to be his wife, Boaz reasoned with himself, it had to be after all the halachic conditions had been satisfied. Thus the Zohar concludes:

The world is called an OLAM. Interestingly OLAM means hidden. What is hidden? G-d is hidden and he is hidden throughout the world. Interestingly the more we do G-d’s commandments the more vision and clear the world looks.

This OLAM is like a game. A game similar to “Wheel of Fortune”, where one has to turn over the puzzle board and therefore making the entire board clearer. The board is pretty large it encompasses the entire world. The mission of the Jewish people over the last 3,300 years, the Jewish role in history and the essence of the concept of the Chosen People – a people chosen for the responsibility of teaching the world about one God and absolute morality. But there is much left to do before the vision the Jewish people saw at Mount Sinai becomes a world reality. The Jews have always believed that they have a key role to play in bringing this vision to fruition. We are to create a society based on a God-given standard of morality that will serve as the model for the rest of humanity to emulate – to be “a light unto the nations.”

When we look back on the vast sweep of the last four thousand years we see how significantly the Jewish people have directly and indirectly affected humanity.

The Jewish monarch represents the Jewish people. He rules with justice and mercy. It’s his mission to guide and to turn over the most impure part of life and manifest it to a source of kedusha. G-d chose the very organ that is the source of life, which can also be chosen to use for the basest acts, as the site to be sanctified with circumcision. This gives us the profound message that we can use every physical drive for holy purposes.

Chanukah always falls out during this time of the year where days are short and nights are at its longest. It is our mission to light the candles, to bring light in to the darkness, to see things more clear, to flip the puzzle board, to transform an illicit moment to the spiritual.

Interestingly the menorah is lit by Jews in public showcase all over the world….may we, the chosen people continue to make this world more clear.

The impossible dream: Lech Lecha

November 1, 2015 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Yissachar frand, Berel Wein, , Yossi Bilius and Dr. Abba Goldman

“Stars”, “Stars”, “Stars” – this is one of the glaring words, part of one of the famous Jewish blessing catch phrases. G-d answered Avraham, when Avraham questions G-d: “What can you give me, I am childless?” G-d answers by promising Avraham that he will have children. G-d directs Avraham outside and asks him to look up and count the stars, saying “Thus will be your descendants” [Bereshit 15:2-5].

Well, may I ask the reader: “What would you do?” It’s a great vote of confidence where G-d assures Avraham that he will have children, however, now he has the dubious task to follow G-d’ command and count stars.

Are you kidding me, there are billions of stars? How long shall I count? Ones might ask themselves. It’s an impossible Dream, To Count the Impossible Count.

Rav Meir Shapiro asks, “What would be our reaction if someone told us to go out and count the stars?”

Our reaction would be to simply ignore the request. We would say, “I know this is an impossible task. I know it is beyond the realm of possibility. Why even bother?”

What did Avraham do? He went out and counted the stars! Yelp that’s exactly what he did. He attempted to do the impossible. He actually went outside and began to count the stars. G-d responded “This is the way your descendants will be” (Koh Yihehye zarecha).

“This attribute that you are showing here now — when it looks impossible, when it looks beyond the reach of human beings, nevertheless to try; nevertheless to give it one’s best — Koh Yiheyeh Zarecha. That is the characteristic of the children of Yisrael. That is what a Jew is going to be like. Even though the task seems strenuous and back breaking, it seems almost impossible, we still must try.”

The least we can do is trying. And when we try, we sometimes see that amazing things can happen. We think that we don’t have such strengths and such abilities to withstand that which life deals us. We think it is beyond our capability. But we try and we are gifted and granted with ‘kochot meyuchadot’ – ‘ special strengths’ that we never dreamt we possessed.

That is the Blessing of “Thus shall be your descendants.” The children of Yisroel has the attribute of looking at something which seems impossible, but nevertheless trying, never giving up… and being rewarded with powers that they never thought they had.

We can see how great the potential of man and how he can beat the odds and reach for the stars from this story presented to me by Rabbi Yossi Bilus.

A survey was taken in rural Baltimore section, on the effect of the lifestyle and achievement of low social working class. Most of the two hundred students surveyed from the high school were from broken families who were confronted by drugs, high crime and gang related issues daily.

The conclusion related by many of the socialist and psychologist, that were leading the study, was that sadly it was very difficult to believe that the majority of the group surveyed would make a positive contribution to society.

Interestingly, twenty years later one of the students of the surveyed grade of the high school, now a professor in psychology in the local university came across the transcripts of the study and was curious as to how are fellow comrades faired in life.

The professor committed himself to take the dubious task to locate and interview the student of twenty years past.

Out of the grade of two hundred, fifteen were no longer in the world, approximately ten he couldn’t track, however, the majority of the one hundred and seventy five, surprisingly, were living productive lives. How was that possible? How were they able to beat the odds? How they were able to make all these socialists and psychologists look terribly wrong?

It seems like a name of one teacher surfaced on many of the interviews. This teacher made an impression on the students.

The professor realized what a priority it was to locate the teacher and ask her miraculous method of teaching.

He located her in a nursing home and made an appointment to see her. Old and frail, however, very conscious and alert, he asked what was your secret in your teaching method that many of your students looked at you so admirably?

The old teacher said: “I implanted in them the understanding that they can succeed, they can do it!! We have to believe in ourselves. Then our dreams can come true.”

We Jews should especially take note of this story for if the gentiles believe in the “impossible dream”, we who are blessed with “Koh Yihehye zarecha” our dreams are on the threshold of reality.

The Torah hints of many examples of this bracha – blessing come to the person.

Yosef built his hopes for the future. He implored the butler/officer of Pharaoh to remember him to the king and set him free.

We can learn a valuable lesson from Yosef – the dreamer who in his chance encounter in prison with the butler/officer, the opportunity to pursue his goal and rise to greatness. Yosef will not squander that opportunity nor will he wallow in despair or go against the fate that has treated him so cruelly. He will not allow events and circumstances to deter him from the realization and actualization of his dreams and visions.

Rather, he will attempt to use and exploit all of those circumstances to make his dreams reality and to achieve the greatness that he believes he is entitled to and has been promised to him.

Yosef eventually became viceroy of Egypt, only second in command to Pharaoh. He became leader of a superpower, reaching for the stars and achieving greatness.

Many immigrants come to the land of opportunity to build their dreams. Many have had financial difficulties and are looking to improve. America is a dream to many.

In addition to the financial strains in their homeland, one couple’s main incentive to come to the land of opportunity is “MESHANEH MAKOM MESHANEH MAZAL-change of place is a change of mazal”, in the area of having children – it was ten years and the couple was still childless. Although it wasn’t easy, especially in the late 1950’s – early 1960’s to leave family behind, however, to have an opportunity to make the impossible dream a reality was a tremendous incentive.

They were advised, after a year in their new place of residence, Boro Park, Brooklyn NY, to see the Lubavatcher Rebbi for a bracha. Perhaps his intervention, his prayer will open the door to childbirth.

At the meeting the Rebbi asked if the couple observed the Shabbat where the response was “Although we come from a long line of Rabbis we’re traditional”. The Rebbi then presented the couple with a proposition: commit to Shabbat right at this very moment, observe it to the letter of the law and I promise you’ll have a baby boy in nine months.

The commitment was made and the wife became pregnant right away. Approximately a month before the baby was born which happened at Motzei Pesach-the end of Pesach, the Rebbi usually throws a party. At the party the Lubavitcher Rebbi sees the man who committed to observing Shabbat and again reiterated you will have a boy next month. The next month the promise came to fruition and they had a baby boy.

I know firsthand the accuracy of this story for I am that baby boy. My parents’ hope and dreams were fulfilled for they never gave up. They traveled half way across the continent, left behind friend’s family and culture to accomplish their burning desire, to have children. Ironically, they brought back after a brief absence from their lives the one ingredient needed for having a child – Shabbat.

Speaking about Shabbat, the introduction to the Friday evening prayer is very powerful. There is a passage that is found in the first few paragraphs which states “Moshe and Aharon were among His priests and Shmuel among those who invoke His Name…” [Tehillim 99:6]. The Talmud states that in righteousness, the prophet Samuel (Shmuel) was on the same level as Moshe and Aharon, the two great leaders of Israel. For this reason, the pasuk in Tehillim equates them. The Medrash states that before Shmuel was born, a Heavenly Voice (Bat Kol) proclaimed, “A child is going to be born who will be on the same level as Moshe and his name is going to be Shmuel.” The Medrash says that all the pregnant women at that time named their sons Shmuel when they gave birth, in the hope that perhaps their son was the baby about whom the Bat Kol spoke.

Rabbi Yissachar Frand learns “You know how a Shmuel was produced? He was produced because there was an environment in which everyone strived to have such greatness for their son that he should grow up to be like Moshe Rabbeinu and Aharon!” If EVERYONE is striving to have a Shmuel haNavi, then in fact ONE Shmuel haNavi can emerge! However, if everyone has pedestrian ambitions for their children then greatness will not emerge from anyone in that generation.

When a woman gives birth, she must believe “I just gave birth to the next Gadol HaDor (great man of the generation)”. If a mother thinks like that, she may indeed be able to achieve greatness for her child. If her goal is “okay, he should be a mediocre child,” greatness will never come.

That is the Blessing of “Thus shall be your descendants.” The children of Yisroel have the attribute of looking at something which seems impossible, but nevertheless trying, never giving up… and being rewarded with powers that they never thought they had.

There was once a very important meeting discussing crucial issues in Judaism held in the house of Rav Avrohom Kamenetsky, son of Rav Yakov. All the head Rabbis were gathered there. When the meeting was over, there was a question of protocol as to who should leave the room first. Rav Yakov’s daughter-in-law, who was in the room, was pregnant at the time. She naturally assumed that the great Rabbis should walk out the door first. Rav Yakov insisted that his pregnant daughter-in-law should walk through the door first. Why? He said, “It is because she is pregnant and maybe she is pregnant with Moshiach!”

Can I give a priestly blessing after killing terrorist?

The Future: Noach’s Arc

November 1, 2015 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Noach Isaac Oelbaum, Henoch Leibowitz z’l, Mordechai Aderet, Yossi Bilius, Pinchas Avruch and Mr. Avner Aminov

They’re standing in line in pairs waiting to enter the Arc knowing their future lies with going with Noach. The giraffe, the lion and the chimpanzee, the Arc is the place to be! The animals know it; this is the move to take in order to survive! Yes, it’s animal time, however, we – humans – learn a valuable lesson of life from the secondary being, one has to have foresight; meaning, for every step man must ask himself “What is my action going to result in?” “Where am I going?” This undertaking is a sign of maturity and considered a responsible train of thought.

In this week’s parsha we find the animals playing a glaring role. King Shlomo knew the language of the animals well, he actually never mentioned if any of the species have a sense of humor. It’s funny that over the course of history man has always learned from animals. Do rabbits really hate ducks-RABBIT SEASON-NO DUCK SEASON–OOH!! Bugs bunny has smarts making a mockery of those around him, well aside from Hollywood rendition of animals at the helm and manipulating society, the Torah which preceded Loony Tunes and Hanna Barbera, provides the barometer of the wisdom of the animals. It encourages us to examine their qualities…We should exhibit an almost animal-like intensity in our zeal to fulfill G-d’s will. Leopards are not the largest of the big cats, but they have a ferocity found in few of the great hunters. So too, we should serve G-d proudly, almost fiercely, not being embarrassed to be different from others or to stand up for what we believe in!!

Further teaching from the Torah, the lightness of an eagle implies not being earthbound by physical pleasure or human sluggishness. The swiftness of a deer implies the oneness of purpose and quickness of reflex to follow G-d’s will. Also, the strength of a lion implies possessing the resolve and conviction to withstand temptation and to hold firm to commitments and obligations. As far as the cat goes, Rashi, a major 9th-century commentator says we should learn about modesty from the cat, interpreting the cat’s “modesty” as referring to her habit of burying her feces.

Why do we need this lesson from our furry friends? We tend to gravitate towards learning from them. Let’s just leave them alone. After all they’re just animals.

Interestingly, for those who inquire into the world around them in order to learn how to behave like human beings, and not like animals, the improbability of refined behavior in a bestial habitat will cry out for explanation. The existence of even a tiny minority of animals that act in a non-animal-like way will force the question—Why do they act that way? There is no apparent reason, no prohibition on animals against promiscuity or immodesty or theft. And yet some of these animals possess such traits that can make us humans look bad. The Sages are telling us that the answer that would have come is that nature does have a lesson to teach us, and it is a single lesson—that just as there are animals which exhibit non-animal behavior, we too, although we are also much like animals in our physical make-up, there is an essential something within us that is superior to the animal. Therefore, we have to exceed those good qualities certain animals possess. If they can do it, we surely can do it too!

There are two which I would like to focus on that provides such a valuable lesson on life that it’s vital to peak into their world.

King Shlomo writes if one wants to learn chochma – intelligence – he shall look at the Ant in how she conducts herself, her motives, her actions.

Let’s explore and discover what we can learn from her.

First look how she stores her grains. She makes a three story house. The most valuable of her collections she stores in the middle layer. The top is susceptible to inclement weather and the bottom can be vulnerable to dirt.

Interestingly, the Ant only lives for six months. Yet, she stores food for approximately three hundred years and she does it in the most efficient manner.

Why is she so busy accumulating and storing food?

Shlomo HaMelech writes that the Ant reasons, perhaps G-d will grant me longer life so I need to store food, just in case.

However, there has never been a case where the ant lived longer than 6 months. And, even if she did manage to scrape up a month or two more years, at the most, of precious life, the amount which she feverishly collected is incomprehensibly disproportioned.

We see how much hope and tenacity the Ant has, even though there has not been an Ant that has lived longer than six months in history.

The question is asked on King Shlomo: Why does he advise “If you want to learn chochma – intelligence – you can learn it from the Ant. It should be if one wants to learn zeal, after all, look how fast and meticulously diligent the Aunt is. Why does Shlomo’ emphasis the Ant intelligence?

We learn here that zeal and tenacity comes when one who realizes the significance of potential. In order to value that potential, one needs chochma -intelligence, which is based on the sensitivities of the heart.

The Ant works her entire life thinking maybe G-d’s going to grant me longer life, knowing it would be against human nature. However, the Ant believes in miracles. She believes a miracle can take place.

Even more so, the Jewish nation that believes that we’re building for the next world, for Olam Haba, that is a basic fundamental concept of Judaism. There are much mitzvot, much brownie points to accumulate in a life time… If one says, let me take it easy, I have enough for this world; there is no need to do more mitzvot. He doesn’t have the hope, the belief and the understanding that he’s building for the future.

We see another example of a chacham that is one who is sensitive about his future. After Pharaoh’s dream was interpreted by Yossef that there will be seven fat and prosperous years then seven lean years, Yosef then used the word chacham when referring to what kind of leader Pharaoh needs to carry out the mission and save the world from hunger.

However, the hard part is over and done with. The impossible dream was interpreted. Now all what’s left to do is find someone who is a good organizer, someone who has zeal. Gathering the excess grains, storing the food supply, making sure everything is persevered correctly, consists a person who has a gift of being meticulous. A chacham is not needed anymore. Why did Joseph’ emphasis chochma?

The reason why Chochma is needed is because one has to be sensitive enough to gather all the grain during the fat years and the only way one can execute that task is if one is able to transform himself to the future and imagines that he’s living in the lean years. Then he will be able to collect all the amounts and not miss a grain… It’s quite difficult to gather for lean years when there is abundance.

This is a feeling which comes from the heart which enables us and gives us the ability to transform ourselves to the future. This is not taking away from the concept “let’s live today to the fullest”. However, it’s a little tricky; one has to have the ability to switch gears, change tunes.

Unfortunately, it’s against our nature to do so. Short-sightedness is a natural part of the human condition. We see Avraham making us aware of this when he gathered an army for he was forced to go to war to free his nephew Lot. The Talmud (Nedarim 32b) teaches that they were armed with gold; Tosafot explain that they were armed with wealth so that they would maintain their focus on their lifesaving mission and not be distracted by precious stones and pearls.

Implicit in this commentary is the lesson that had they not been given this wealth in advance they would have become distracted by riches and compromised their mission to save Lot. But these were the righteous students of the Patriarch Avraham.

Chidushei HaLev explains that in the heat of battle one becomes very focused on the ultimate short term goal – victory – and loses sight of the greater mission, the greater goal – in this case, to save Lot’s life. When caught in the throes of this inherently human short-sightedness, even the righteous can lose sight of their mission. With the ultimate objective out of mind, any and all distractions become possible. Thus, Avraham gave his warriors riches in advance, to preempt the power of this great distraction.

The mouse according to a legendary midrash (midrash- is the body of exegesis of Torah texts along with homiletic stories as taught by Chazal (Rabbinical Jewish sages of the post-Temple era) that provide an intrinsic analysis to passages in the Tanakh) fell victim to this short sightedness.

There is a midrash composed by Rabbi Mosh HaDarshan.

Long before Tom and Jerry and Sylvester the cat. Perhaps, one can say might be the source, the root of the cat and mouse deep hatred toward each other.

Both the cat and the mouse were working for Adam who purposely employed many for the sake of unity. A reference to the harmony which Adam wanted to impose is found in the introductory prayer of the Friday evening prayer for Shabbat. LECHU N’RANENA L’HASHEM – let us all sing before G-d. This would bring a tremendous Kiddush Hashem. G-d loves unity and this attempt by Adam would have raised the level of spirituality in the world.

However, the mouse had other plans. The selfish and competitive mouse wanted the glory of serving man himself and approached Adam with a complaint that the cat stole from the house of man.

Adam realized the mouse’s intentions and cursed him, stating “you came speaking evil about someone, which is equivalent to killing someone (the violation of loshon harah) – now the cat will pursue you for the rest of time in order to kill you”.

And so it came to be, the mouse was pursued, caught and killed by the cat. The children of the mouse saw the tragic end of their father and were ever in hiding in different holes in the ground and corners in the walls.

Years later, as all the animals were lined up paired, male – female waiting on line to enter the Ark build by Noach, the male cat said to the female cat “you see those mice, pointing to the ones on line, when I was little, my father killed a mouse and brought it home for dinner and it was delicious”. The cat then stared at the male mouse licking its paw and started to chase after it. The mouse luckily found a whole where it narrowly escaped the claw of the cat and jumped in.

The cat stuck its arm in the whole to fetch the mouse where then the mouse bit it, however not before the cat scratched and ripped the lip of the mouse.

After an hour the mouse went to Noach and said “you’re an Ish Tsaddik – a righteous man, can you please stitch my wound”. Noach answered “go to the cat when he’s sleeping and pull out one of his whiskers, for the whiskers are considered medically very sterile, and I’ll stitch it….And so it was. This is one of the reasons Noach is said to be an Ish Tsaddik.

There are many lessons one can derive from this interesting Midrash. One that pertains to our subject is the mouse was short sighted. The mouse wasn’t able to foresee the importance of Adam’s mission. His greed ruined the cohesiveness of what Adam had intended and as punishment is pursued by the cat till the Mashiach arrives.

There are people who are considered very calculating. That seems to have a negative connotation; however, it’s not necessarily true. I would like to put a positive twist to that statement and say a calculating person is one that looks at the future on every move he or she makes. Although it goes against human nature but it’s a fundamental Jewish concept that is a MUST for our survival.

Mortgaging the future-cat’s in the cradle

July 16, 2015 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Yissachar frand, Chaim Morgenstern, Yossi Bilius and Dr. Abba Goldman

Every so often, something about popular culture hits you like a brick wall. Much about Western society has its seductive pitfalls and some of its craving can contrast Torah’s morality and values. However, life is never clear cut and at times one learns a thing or two, a valuable lesson from the unexpected. When I was a teenager I heard the lyrics of a song, the words were so profound that it had made an impact on my life to this very day. Although, Rock ‘n roll is, for the most part, all about pursuing love that you can’t have which can frustrate and depress you to no end. This song by Harry Chapin titled “Cat’s in the Cradle” is very different from the usual generic cesspool.

My child arrived just the other day,

He came to the world in the usual way,

But there were planes to catch and bills to pay,

He learned to walk while I was away

And he was talking ‘fore I knew it and as he grew

He’d say I’m gonna be like you, Dad

You know I’m gonna be like you

And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you’re coming home dad, I don’t know when,
But we’ll get together then
You know we’ll have a good time then

My son turned ten just the other day,
He said thanks for the ball, dad, come on let’s play
Can you teach me to throw, I said not today
I got a lot to do, he said that’s OK
And he, he walked away, but his smile never did, and said
I’m gonna be like him, yeah
You know I’m gonna be like him

Life is busy and in order to survive one has to spend much time and sometimes overtime to make the buck to support the family. Hey! Money doesn’t grow on trees you know! It seems like the father doesn’t spend time with his son. The first part of the song is expressing those sentiments.

Interestingly, there is a strong question to be asked on one of the most famous statements in the Torah of “Honor you father and your mother for you will have a long life” (Shemot. 20:12)

One should be aware, there are only two commandments in the Torah that a reward is attached to it. Honor your father and your mother is one of them. The other is Sheluach haken, where there is a commandment in sending away the mother bird before taking her young (Devarim 22:6) Both rewards are long life.

On a side note I heard a reason why this is such an important commandment that the Torah equites it to Honoring parents and is rewarded long life. When the mother bird is sent off and comes back she flies all around to find her children. She goes to G-d and complains. “Where are my children?’ G-d becomes upset. Then, G-d remembers from this mother bird & asks “Where are my children?” This big mitzvah reminds G-d that His children are still in the diaspora and should bring us back home, to the nest, the Beit Hamikdash,

The sages ask a profound question through a story. Once a father asked his son to perform the commandment of Sheluach haken. The boy climbed the tree to shoo away the mother bird to then grab the young hens where he slipped and fell tragically to his death. The Sages asked where the long life is. As a matter of fact he performed two of the commandments for long life and was taken from this world rather suddenly!!

In this week’s parsha there is a familiar scene, one where human weakness is glaring and through this negativity, one can learn a valuable lesson where one can literately take home.

And they said, “We will build sheep pens for our livestock here and cities for our children.” (32:16)

The Jewish people reached the plains of Moav, ready for an invasion of Canaan. The Promised Land was to be fought for. G-d had sworn to our forefathers that it be given as an inheritance. But the tribes of Gad and Reuven, rich in livestock, preferred the lush pasturelands of the Trans-Jordan to shares in Eretz Yisrael proper. They asked Moshe for permission to take their share in the Trans-Jordan.

Moshe berated them for letting the others fight to conquer Canaan while they settled down in their ranches. Furthermore, their reluctance to cross would have a demoralizing effect on the others.

“This is what we want to do,” they said to Moshe. “We want to build sheep pens for our livestock here and towns for our children. Then we will go quickly at the head of the army and fight until the land is conquered and apportioned. Only then will we return to our homes.”

“All right,” said Moshe (32:24), “build towns for your children and pens for your sheep. And make sure you keep your word.”

Notice that Moshe reversed the order of their priorities. They wanted to “build sheep pens for our livestock here and towns for our children.” First let us take care of the livestock. Let us make sure we have pens in which to keep them so they don’t wander off into the hills and get lost or stolen.

Cows and sheep are valuable assets, and we have to take good care of them. Then they spoke about building “towns for our children.” Then we will provide our children with a place to live while we are at war.

Oh no, Moshe replied. You have it backwards. First of all, “build towns for your children.” Make sure you have attended to the needs of your children. Afterwards, you can also build “pens for your sheep.” First you take care of your children, and then you worry about your cattle.

When we look at this incident, we say to ourselves, “How foolish can people be? How warped can their values be? How can anyone put the welfare of his cattle before the welfare of his children?”

Unfortunately, this is not an isolated incident, something bizarre that happened thousands of years ago. It is an everyday phenomenon. People become focused on their livelihood, on developing a business, on advancing professionally, on building a practice, and their kids get lost in the shuffle. They don’t realize that they are making the exact same mistake as the tribes of Gad and Reuven. But it is true. It happens all too often.

Rashi writes (32:24) that the tribes of Gad and Reuven did not return home to the Trans-Jordan until after the seven years of conquest and the seven years of apportionment. They remained in Eretz Yisrael for a full fourteen years. Those little children they left behind — let’s assume they were 3 or 4 years old — how old were they when their fathers returned home? Teenagers! Practically adults! The Midrash tells us that their fathers were shocked to find that their sons had long hair, that they were indistinguishable from their pagan neighbors.

This is what happens when parents give priority to their wealth over their children.

The Ktav Sofer raises a question with the latter part of Moshe’s words. After helping the tribes of Gad and Reuven get their priorities straight, he told them, “Make sure you keep your word.” Why was this necessary?

The answer, says the Ktav Sofer, is that Moshe knew with whom he was dealing. People who could even think of protecting their money before they protect their children cannot be trusted. They are so intent on their wealth that they can do anything. Therefore, Moshe had to exhort them to keep their word.

The quest for wealth can become more obsessive than any other quest. All too often, the children are the price of the wealth.

SURPRISING DISCOVERY

In parshat Vayera we learn that G-d wanted to share a secret with someone very dear to Him and that person was Avraham. The secret was what He intended to do to the people of Sedom and Amorah, which was to annihilate them. The Sages explain why Avraham was so dear to G-d; it was because “he (Avraham) will command his children”. In other words what the Sages were implying was that Avraham will raise his children properly and pass down the concept of G-d which his offsprings dutifully complied.

Interestingly, the world was a world of Idol worshipers. Avraham stood out from the crowd and was known as “Lone Ranger”. He became the ambassador to G-d and professed the monotheism concept. It was strange to say the least in the eyes of the public. This action was unprecedented at that time. Avraham pushed the concept. He had chutzpah!! Secondly, let’s not forget his famous trademark kindness. His door to his tent was open on all four sides for passerby’s to enter. Avraham sets the rules on the concept of kindness. And yet, he is cherished by G-d, not for those standout achievements but, for his ability to transmit his legacy to his children. That overrode everything else?! That struck a sensitive cord in G-d that He proclaimed that Avraham is His love?

Avraham was a “hands on” dad. He was close to his children. He went out of his way to communicate to his children; he was there for his kids.

When the Torah states honor your parents for you will have a long life, long life means your life will be extended through your children. They will follow your philosophy; they will pass down your legacy. They will cherish what was important to you.

However, there has to be an investment into the children and that is to spend time with them!! Why would this work? Although there is no guarantee, however, one has to play the percentages. Since children’s intellects are not fully developed, they function mostly from their emotions rather than from logic. The result is that they learn and absorb more from what they see than from what they hear. Therefore, showing one’s children how to properly do things in person has a greater impact and influence than telling them so. This is what they take with them into adulthood. The fond memories of the parents physically there. Now let’s take this a step further.

There is a strong connection between keeping the Jewish faith and bonding with parents. Our Torah is passed down by tradition which we call the chain. The home is where this platform occurs. So it’s imperative; it’s Jewish survival to have a good parents- child relationship.

Interesting to note, as parents we are seduced by “making money” and we use it as an excuse to avoid our precious children. Our children, though, have a seductive outlet as well. With the creation of media and these days’ social media there is a stronger connection outside the home then inside the home. One now can have their primary social outlet outside the family framework. That is dangerous.

Personally, when I was growing up the media had a tremendous impact on all of us. I can just imagine what the pressure the average teenager goes through today. Our dinner table was disrupted daily by the giant television which was present. That contraption alienated my parents and I. What saved the relationship was Shabbat where we were forced to sit and talk to each other without any electronic gadgets and business dealing on the phone.

So besides being a slave to the business one now has an added servitude, they’re a slave to the media.

We have to savor the moment with our children. They grow up fast and before one knows it they’re out of the house.

Speaking about the media and popular culture the last two stanza of the song is something that is etched in my psyche forever and has helped me deal with my family with the utmost sensitivity.

Well, he came from college just the other day,
So much like a man, I just had to say
Son, I’m proud of you, can you sit for a while
He shook his head, and he said with a smile
What I’m feeling like, dad, is to borrow the car keys
See ya later, can I have them, please

I’ve long since retired, my son’s moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said I’d like to see you if you don’t mind
He said I’d love to dad, if I could find the time
You see my new job’s a hassle, and the kids have the flu
But it’s sure nice talking to you dad
It’s been sure nice talking to you

And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me
He’d grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

And the cat’s in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you’re coming home son, I don’t know when,
But we’ll get together then, dad
We’re gonna have a good time then

Money makes the world go round

July 3, 2015 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Akiva Grunblatt Rosh Yeshiva Yeshivat Chaffetz Chaim, Yissachar frand

There is an age-old question that has been haunting us Jews forever: Why do tzadikim have to go through hardship in this world? Why doesn’t G-d give a ‘special tzadikim credit card’ to spend on things such as yeshiva tuition, preparing for Shabbat, etc.? The financial pressures are tremendous. Many can’t meet these expectations, often saying, “Always live within your income, even if you have to borrow money to do so”. Perhaps for this reason, people turn for help. It’s interesting how many people become observant due to challenges that they’ve experienced in life. Why is it human nature to turn to G-d when going through troublesome times? We rarely see a “rags to riches” guy turn to G-d. The story always mimics the following pattern: A boy from a poor family starts a business or gets an education, working hard to climb the ladder of success. There never seems to be a religion attached to the story. He’s not learning Gemara as he climbing up the ladder of success. Furthermore the “success story individual”, for the most part, flirts with the notion of rebelling against G-d, arrogantly claiming that religion is a nice concept but very remote to his high end lifestyle. “I’ll contact a Rabbi for the bar mitzvah of my children; but the buck stops there!”

It is known that high-end lottery winners often ruin their lives as a result of amassing a large amount of money in such a short period of time. On a similar note, our Sages say that there is a pattern in our scriptures as to how some Jews and non-Jews handle success. G-d gave abundance of wealth to Avraham, who personifies the rags to riches story. In turn, Moshe and Chizkiyahu approached life with modesty and appreciation. However, they were a part of the precious few. For the most part, man doesn’t handle wealth very well. Examples are given of famous Gentiles like Nimrod, and Pharaohs who have taken the gift and, seemingly shoved it in G-d’s face.

Money makes the world go round…..

In this week’s parsha we read about a Korach, a unique Jewish individual from a prominent family who was considered the richest man of his generation. He was accumulated a lot of wealth from the booty left on the shores of the sea after the waters went back from the miracle of splitting the sea. At times, money leads to power. However, Korach was frustrated that he wasn’t able to achieve that status even with all his accumulated wealth. His wealth brought him arrogance, where he thought he deserved the world and a backbone to complain and rebel.
Wealth is seductive and tends to bring out the conceit in human nature. The Chovot Halevavot, in The Gate of Humility, one of the major works in the literary Jewish world, tells us that wealth is a greater test than poverty.

Our Sages comment on the verse “And behold, a ladder was standing on the ground, and its top reached the Heavens” [Bereshis 28:12] referring to the famous dream our forefather Yaakov had. It was a significant prophetic message to Yaakov’s descendants. In the dream, there were angels going up the ladder and there were angels going down the ladder. G-d showed Yaakov two individuals: Korach (who was swallowed up by the ground) and Moshe (who ascended up to the Heaven).

…..world go round

Why are Korach and Moshe hinted to by the ladder? There is a very interesting Ba’al HaTurim (commentary on the Torah) referring to that famous verse. The Ba’al HaTurim says that the numerical [“Gematria”] value of the word ladder (samech-vov-lamed-mem) [60+6+30+40=136] is equal to the numerical value of the word money (mem-mem-vov-nun) [40+40+6+50=136], and it is also equal to the numerical value of the word poverty (ayin-vov-nun-yud) [70+6+50+10=136].

A ladder can be used as a parable for money. Just as a ladder can be used to climb to great heights or descend to the depths, so is the case with money. A person can be blessed with money, do the right things with money, and go up the ladder. On the other hand, money corrupts. Money can be a terribly destructive force.

……world go round

There is no coincidence of the timing of Yaacov’s dream. Soon after he met his father in law, the wicket Lavan, who had a plan. By having Yaakov work for fourteen years for his wives, and by subsequently promising him wealth and continually changing his compensation, Lavan hoped his ultra-orthodox son-in-law would trade the soul for the silver spoon. That his mind would become so preoccupied with making a living that he’d forget his desire for the spiritual, his taste for the refined having been congested and clogged by the crude trappings of material success.

The Aramaean tried to destroy my desire. The word avi – my father – can also mean ‘my desire.’ The Lavan’s of the world are always there to seduce us with their promises of wealth, fame, and happiness. “All it takes is hard work,” they say. And maybe they really will make us rich – but at what price?

Many people have the custom, on Motzaei Shabbat [Saturday night], to sing a beautiful Pizmon [poem] which begins with the words “HaMavdil bein Kodesh L’chol, chatoteinu Hu yimchol” — He who distinguishes between that which is holy and that which is not holy, He will forgive our sins. These are beautiful words. Interestingly, the words can be quite appalling. The poem says that we sin because we do not appreciate the difference between that which is Sacred and that which is mundane. We spend our time and efforts on foolishness. We do not know what is Kodesh and what is Chol. We ask G-d, Who has the ability to distinguish between Kodesh and Chol, to please forgive our sins.
(The Lubliner Rav, Rav Meir Shapiro, once said about American Jews that they know how to make Kiddush, but they don’t know how to make Havdalah. In other words, they put the wrong emphasis on things. That which is holy, they treat lightly, and that which is really unessential, they make holy. They do not know how to differentiate.)

………..Money Money Money Money

What is the next line of the Pizmon? “zareinu v’chaspeinu yarbeh k’chol,” which means: “May our children and our money increase like the sand.” This, in and of itself — the lumping of children and money in the same breath — would be difficult to comprehend. But, moreover, we just finished saying that we are inadequate for not being able to distinguish between Holy and mundane, and now we go ahead and make the same mistake all over again — equating that which is Holy (children) with that which is mundane (money)!

In the beginning of laws of Chanukah [3:1], The Ramba”m says, “In the time of the Second Temple, the Greek Government made decrees against Israel and tried to abolish their religion. They did not permit them to learn Torah or perform the mitzvos, and they sent forth their hands against their property and their daughters.”

Let us consider this list: They nullified our religion, they did not let us learn, they did not permit us do mitzvot, they took away our daughters, and they took away… our money. Money may be important, but should it be listed in the same breath with the others? Should the Ramba”m be equating taking our money with taking our daughters (and not only that, but the Ramba”m mentions money first!)?
How are we to understand this statement of the Ramba”m?

Rabbi Yissachar Frand quotas Rav Shimon Schwab who offers a beautiful insight, both in the Ramba”m and in the Pizmon. Rav Schwab says that what the Ramba”m means by saying the Greeks took away our money and our daughters, is that the Greeks knew how to destroy us. If we are to succeed with our children and with our religion, we need money. In order to have Yeshivot, shuls, a community, one needs money. Money is a wonderful thing. Let’s not kid ourselves. We can do tremendous things with money. We cannot exist without money.

But money corrupts, sometimes… most of the time. However, money, in and of itself, can be the greatest tool that there is. Our Sages say that when G-d showed Moshe our leader, who guided us out of Egypt, a Half-Shekel coin, He showed Moshe a ‘coin of fire.’ The reason is because that is what money is. Money can be terribly destructive, like a fire. But where would we be without fire? No heat, no light, nothing.

Money is the same way. If one handles it right, it can save him. If one handles it wrong, it can destroy him.

This, the Ramba”m says, is what the Greeks understood. When they wanted to take out the foundations of the Jewish people, they sent forth their hands against their money and their daughters. Take away their money. Don’t let them have Yeshivas, don’t let them have Torah educators. That is how the Jewish People will be destroyed. The Ramba”m has his priorities very straight. The Greeks knew how to wage a war.

Rav Schwab says that this too, is what we say on Motzaei Shabbot: If we want to be successful with our children, then we also need ‘our money (to) increase like sand.’

Imagine! Money like sand, unlimited funds! Consider what that would mean. We could pay educators, instead of their current low rate salary, more sponsors for “Cup of Coffee weekly periodicals — one-half, one-third, or one-quarter of what the lawyers and the doctors are earning – an amount that they truly deserve.

Imagine if we could pay our teachers top dollar. What would the face of Torah education in America look like if we had unlimited resources and could pay top dollar? What would be if we could drop the class ratio from one teacher per 25 kids, to one teacher per 15 kids?

What about the children that need extra help? For those children, we could even have one teacher for every two children. It wouldn’t matter if that would require an extra salary! We could do amazing things. The Jewish People would be a different Jewish People if our children and our money were ‘increased like the sand.’

That is the prayer. We know what is holy and sacred and we know what is mundane and profane… and we know what money can do. We can do the right things with money. We can change the Jewish People with money. We pray that we have ‘children and money like sand’ to accomplish wonderful things for the Jewish people.

However lets not forget the pitfalls of money and how the Sages equate it to quicksand. If one has a hundred he wants two hundred. Lets not forget what our wise Sages said about it being the bigger test between rich and poor. For this reason the tzadikim go through hardship because there would be much less of them if they had the excess money.G-d is doing them a favor!!

Rav Yehuda Hanasi, who was the aurther of the prestigious Mishna, who also happened to be one of the riches man of his generation, always gave wealthy Jews the utmost respect. He said if one is wealthy and he still follows the Torah to the letter of the law, therefore not succumbing to temptation and arrogance then I tip my hat to them. They have passed a tremendous test and will have a special place in the heavens.

Our Brave Israeli solderes protect the holy city of Tel Aviv

June 4, 2015 Rabbi Avi Matmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Paysach krohn, Yissachar frand and survey by Boaz Davidoff

“Perception” is very important. How one sets the table determines the tone, the heartbeat of the moment. There is a very important lesson one can learn from this week’s parsha, Shlach, which our Sages try to emphasize. It comes naturally to one particular individual, my fun-loving aunt. My Aunt Tamar has a unique quality of painting a rosy picture of our home land, Israel.

She set the tone many times as she picked us up from the airport when we arrived in Israel. I’ll never forget as we were waiting at the traffic light in her car, staring at the Israeli solders guarding the area surrounding the airport, how she raved these are the best solders in the world; they protect us. Those words gave me a reassuring feeling of safety, especially after all the attacks against our people. On many occasions, she would tell my mother, ” Roza, lo ta’amini kama ha’aretz shelonu hitpate’ach”, you would not believe how our Israel has blossomed”. She was referring to the new roads, central bus station and neighborhoods that had opened up. My mother grew up in Israel in the pre-state Palestine and early statehood. My Aunt Tamar would kid with me smiling and say “maybe its not as modern and sophisticated like your America but we’re not too far behind; we have kinyons- huge shopping malls too”. If one would play some Israeli popular culture tunes as she’s talking about the cafes and restaurants it would seem like an Israeli tourist commercial. A little song and dance to go with her pitch and I’m sold. Guide me to the American neighborhoods in Israel please!!

A student of Reb Yisrael Salanter ( father of the Musar movement in Orthodox Judaism and a famed Rosh Yeshiva and Talmudist) once went to his master and told him that he was going to Eretz Yisrael, the Land of Israel. He inquired of his Rebbe what he should be careful about. Reb Yisrael told him to be careful not to transgress the prohibition of speaking Lashon HaRah [evil] about Eretz Yisrael. Just as our ancestors’ actions set patterns for us in a positive direction (ma’aseh Avot siman l’Banim), so too can they do in a negative direction. There was an action of our ancestors concerning Eretz Yisrael — the incident of the Spies. This incident implanted for all generations a tendency within us, that when a person goes to visit Eretz Yisrael he may wish to dwell on its shortcomings rather than on its tremendous attributes. Reb Yisroel therefore told the student “Be careful, and don’t stumble in the sin of the spies.”

However it is becoming a difficult task to see the positive light. With the advent of jet airplanes and overseas travel, we can, at a whim, hop on a plane and spend a few days in Eretz Yisrael [the Land of Israel]. It wasn’t always so easy. In earlier times, travelling to Israel involved a long, exhausting, and sometimes dangerous journey over land and water. In fact, to “visit” Israel at all was quite uncommon. Most people who undertook the journey did so to move there permanently. To go there for a week or ten days was unheard of.

Today, we are blessed to have such ready accessibility to our Holy Land. Sometimes, though, this blessing can be a two-edged sword. The easier it becomes to visit Israel, the more commonplace and ho-hum it becomes. Travelling to the Holy Land, which had once been seen as a holy pilgrimage and a spiritually uplifting mission which could change one’s life forever, is now weighed by potential vacationers against a trip to Florida or summer camp for the kids – “What should we do this year…” The more difficult something is, the more commitment and resolution it requires, the more meaningful it becomes. We have to be careful that in today’s global, travel-happy society, we do not lose sight of our Holy Land and its significance.

The story of the Spies and their nation which looked a gift horse in the mouth and rejected it … the one time that they should have accepted it. Just as the momentary eating from the Aitz HaDa’as Tov v’Rah-the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil-cost mankind Paradise until this day, likewise has the momentary rejection of Eretz Yisroel back at our beginning cost us 3,322 years of exile, and counting. Scary how quick decisions can be costly.

We see many examples from the Torah how important the land is and what attitude we should have towards it. A verse concerning our forefather Avraham says “And G-d said to Avraham, ‘Lift your eyes and see from the place where you are standing there. For all the land that you see, I will give to you and your children.'” [Bereshis 13:14] Before G-d showed Avraham the Land, he advised him to lift up his eyes. That is the approach that one must take when viewing the Land of Israel. It must be with ‘lifted eyes’. It requires, sometimes, an uplifted vision to see beyond the imperfections and to recognize the beauty and greatness of the Land.

Our leader Moshe went through painstaking experiences to ensure that his successor would be ready to deal with such problems.

Many of us are familiar with the teaching of our Rabbis that the letter Yud that was added to the name Hoshea came from the name of our first Matriarch. Sarah originally was called Sarai. Moshe took the Yud that was dropped from her name and gave it to Hoshea. Moshe anticipated that Yehoshua would need tremendous strength and assertiveness to stand up against the other spies in defending the Land and the plan to inhabit it. Moshe felt that because of his personality traits, Hoshea did not have the resolve necessary to stand up and fight. That is why he had to give him the new name including the letter Yud.

But still, what does the Yud from Sarai have to do with protecting Hoshea? If there was one personality in Tanach who had strength to stand up to adversity and know how to fight ill influences, that was our Matriarch Sarah. When she saw that there was a Yishmael growing up with her son Yitzchak and she saw that this person would provide the wrong type of influence for her son, she knew what type of action was necessary. She insisted, “Send this lady out of my house with her son, into the desert!” When Avraham questioned her how he could act so cruelly, G-d told him, “All that Sarai tells you, listen to her” [Bereshis 21:12]. That took a tremendous strength. But a mother knew what was right for her child. She knew that so-called compassion now would end in cruelty. What was required over here was to say emphatically, “I am sorry. I will not have my son ruined!” Yehoshua also required that. There were 10 people, great and worthy leaders. It would be necessary to stand-up to the Gedolei HaDor-people who are considered the heads of the generation, in effect. Where does one get that strength? One gets it from what Sarah our Matriarch had. Sarah was the Torah prototype when it came to standing up to the wrong crowd. The YUD represent the strength of personality that will be needed by Yehoshua.

There are many tests we encounter comparing the land of Israel and its people, our brothers, to other lands and nations of the world. Our thought and perception of Israel can be ruined by those notions. That negativity is similar to Yehoshua encountering the ten spies. We need the YUD to stand up and fight the influence, the materialistic influence for that matter, against those seductions. We need the YUD to stop those who dissuade us from visiting, because of safety reasons, or to a higher extent, make pilgrimage to the holy land.

There was a study which found Israeli citizens who were on the lower part of the income chart, needed less to live and were satisfied with what they had more then any other citizens in the world.

When the Gerrer Rebbe, zt”l, (25 December 1866 – 3 June 1948), also known as the

Imrei Emes after the works he authored, was the third Rebbe of the Hasidic dynasty of Ger, went to Eretz Yisrael before the Second World War he wrote back a letter and referred to the “holy city of Tel Aviv”. His Chassidim wondered — we would understand “the holy city of Jerusalem”; we would understand “the holy city of Hevron”; “the holy city of Tzfat” — But the “holy city of Tel Aviv”?! What is so holy about Tel Aviv?

The Gerrer Rebbe wrote back and told his Chassidim, “The only Houses of Worship in Tel Aviv are synagogues! Other cities have churches and mosques, but Tel Aviv is holy — it has only synagogues!” This is the “lift your eyes” that G-d said to Avraham — to see that Tel Aviv has its holiness and not to dwell upon the imperfections.

We see more examples how careful one should be with people associated with the land. Yaacov our forefather was afraid of Eisav because perhaps his good deeds might prevail over his. What were his good deeds? Eisav honored his parents in a tremendous way. Secondly, he lived in Israel.

The Talmud saw the Land of Israel as a supreme religious value that under certain circumstances allowed Jews to reacquire and purchase land in the Land of Israel from non-Jews even on the Shabbat. It promoted the concept of “yishuv Eretz Yisrael” – the settlement and upbuilding of the Land of Israel as a religious obligation and a supreme value in Judaism and Jewish life.

I was anxiously anticipating arriving at the old neighborhood, Floranteen, of where my grandparents lived. It has been twenty years since I visited; my grandparents have long since left this world. As I was coming nearer I could smell the scent of the sandy industrial neighborhood causing millions of memories of my childhood visits.

On one such memory, we were sitting, mom, Aunt Tamar and my grandparents, on the porch of my grandparents house, on a shabbat afternoon. where my aunt convinced me to eat a fruit; it was a peach. She said Israel has the best peaches in the world.

Today, my life style has changed. I had to give up the Haagen-Dazs /pizza diet which I was a mainstay for the past gazillion years, because of health reasons. Eating more fruits and vegetables is now a necessity. Being exposed to natures candy a lot more, I must admit, my Aunt Tamar was right. Israeli peaches are the best I have ever tasted. Perhaps the background music on the Israeli tourist commercial can stop. I’m sold on the land of Israel……HOW SWEET IT IS.

What is a woman’s role in Judaism?

March 12, 2015 avimatmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Yissachar Frand, Yossi bilus also contributing Marina Goodman, Esther Matmon and Dr. Abba Goldman

Bnos Malka Academy – girls school located in Queens

Dr. Jessica Jacob is an obstetrician-gynecologist in New Hyde Park, New York and is affiliated with North Shore University Hospital. She received her medical degree from NYU School of Medicine and has been in practice for 31 years. Dr. Jacobs balances marriage, children and grandchidren, successful practice and a very strict orthodox life

Hillary and Bill Clinton stopped by a gas station to fill up their tank for their long journey back to New York. The gas attendant smiled and shmoozed with Hillary as if he knew her from the past. After leaving, Bill asked Hillary “how do you know him?” Hillary replied “I once dated him”. With a snicker, Bill said to Hillary “you see, picking me was the right choice…..I became a President”. Hillary countered back “if I would have married him, he would have been a President”.

It’s a cute joke as a matter of fact, interestingly, the Gemara teaches us that women were born with a BINA YETERA-an extra intelligent sensory, where she can see what men can’t and man needs that. Rav Chaim Volozhin has a beautiful interpretation of the verse EZER K’NEGDO-man’s helper. An expression found pertaining to Eve, who helped man, her husband, Adam, to build the world. However, the literal meaning of K’NEGDO doesn’t mean “helper”, in fact quite the contrary; it could imply “against him”. Rav Chaim is emphatic in his interpretation. She should not be afraid to voice her opinion and on many occasions it very well can be the opposite opinion. A wife is not supposed to be a “yes lady”. Men are from Mars and women are from Venus and each come to the table with a different perspective of how to achieve the goals set out by the couple.

We see G-d telling Avraham to listen to his wife Sarah and confront his other son, Yishmael asking him to leave the house because Sarah saw him as a bad influence on her son, Yitzchak. It seemed like Sarah had a greater vision of the situation at hand.

Rivka, Yitchak’s wife, daringly orchestrated that the brachot should be given to the younger son- Yaakov as appose to Eisav. Rivka knew he was the right choice to be the air-apparent.

The question asked is what exactly is the BINA YETERA-an extra intelligent sensory and how do women use it to improve the world?

Dr. Goldman says women are more deeply inspired then men; they are unwilling to switch gears, while men did switch gears by fluctuating between believing in G-d one moment, and turning to Golden Calf the next.

This explains Rabbi Yissachar basis perspective on the verse in this week’s parsha. After Moshe called the people together and urged them to donate to the Tabernacle, the people started bringing the material. “And the men came upon the women (al haNashim)” [35:22]. The commentary Da’at Zekeinim m’Baale HaTosfot, provides an interesting interpretation. The pasukim [verses] reveal that the donated items were various types of women’s jewelry. The Da’at Zekeinim comments “and nevertheless the women participated and were meticulous to contribute in the Service of Heaven”. The pasuk is teaching us that the men took the women to donate the gold from their jewelry to the Mishkan, thinking that the women would be reluctant to do so. However, in actuality, the women gave willingly. Therefore, the Da’at Zekeinim adds, the women were given a reward that they were excluded from having to do work on Rosh Chodesh. This is a custom cited in Shulchan Aruch, that women do not do work on Rosh Chodesh [The new moon (beginning of a new lunar month)] [Orach Chaim 417:1]. At what point in time did the women receive this holiday? They received this holiday at the time of the building of the Mishkan, when they distinguished themselves through their willing donation of their jewelry to the Service of G-d.
The Da’at Zekeinim explains further that during the incident of the Golden Calf, the men took their wives’ jewelry by force. The women had refused to contribute to the Golden Calf. In contrast, by the building of the Mishkan, the women wanted to donate their jewelry. According to the Medrash, the contrast is even starker. The Medrash records that in relation to the Mishkan, there were in fact many men who were reluctant to give their money, while the women were universally enthusiastic.
The Da’at Zekeinim theorizes that because the Mishkan was erected on Rosh Chodesh Nissan, it was specifically Rosh Chodesh Nissan which was originally given to the women as a work-free festival. The Da’at Zekeinim concludes that the custom to refrain from work on every Rosh Chodesh was a derivative of this original holiday.

What is the significance of Rosh Chodesh that it was seen as a fitting holiday to give to the women?
Rabbi Frand saw a beautiful interpretation in the sefer [book] Shemen Hatov by Rabbi Dov Weinberger, which answers this question. Later in the parsha, the pasuk says, “And he made the Kiyyor of copper and its base of copper from the mirrors of the legions [women] who massed by the entrance of the Tent of Meeting [Shmos 38:8]. There is a beautiful Rash”i here that elaborates: “The women of Israel had used these mirrors when beautifying themselves.”

Rash”i explains why these mirrors were so precious to G-d. When the Jews were enslaved in Egypt, the men gave up hope. They did not want to live with their wives. They did not want to have children. The thought of fathering children who would be born into and live and die in slavery was overwhelmingly depressing. As the Medrash in Shir HaShirim describes, the women went out into the fields and beautified themselves in front of their mirrors and convinced and persuaded their husbands to live with them and to have children. Those mirrors represented Klal Yisroel. Had it not been for those mirrors and that makeup and the beautification efforts of those women, there would not have been a Jewish nation. Consequently, G-d insisted that those precious mirrors did in fact belong in the Mishkan.
We see that those women exhibited the attribute of faith in redemption. When all seemed bleak and full of despair, when no future seemed to exist, when there appeared to be no purpose in having children, the women retained a hope in the future. The women kept the dream of rebirth alive. When the men were feeling down and were ready to give up, it was the women who insisted “We must go on.” When the time to build the Mishkan arrived (according to many Rishonim this was after the sin of the Golden Calf), the men said, “We don’t want a Mishkan”. The Mishkan represented a great descent from spiritual heights for the Jewish people. Had there not been a sin of the Golden Calf, there would have been no need for a Mishkan. The Shechinah [Divine Presence of G-d] would have permeated the entire camp.

There would have been no divisions — such as “The Camp of the Divine Presence”, “The Camp of the Levites”, “The Camp of the Israelites” — within the Jewish people. The entire camp would have been a “Camp of the Divine Presence”. We would have been on such a high spiritual level that G-d would not have had to confine Himself to a single Mishkan [Tabernacle].
But after the sin of the Golden Calf, G-d said that He could no longer dwell among the entire camp. He needed a special place — the Mishkan. Consequently, to the men, the Mishkan represented, not a spiritual height, but spiritual compromise and descent. The men lost their enthusiasm for contributing to the Mishkan. They were reluctant to donate their gold and silver.
The women, however, again prevailed. They came forward enthusiastically saying, “We must go on; do not despair; do not dwell on the negative; there must be a future; there must be rebirth; there must be renaissance”. This is a unique attribute of women! They demonstrated this attribute in Egypt, they demonstrated it by the Golden Calf, and they demonstrated it by the Mishkan, and it says in the Torah that in the merit of righteous women – Moshiach will come with its redemption!
This spirit, our Sages say, is most appropriately rewarded through the festival of Rosh Chodesh. Rosh Chodesh represents rebirth, renaissance, and renewal. “This month for you is the beginning of all months…” [Shmos 12:2]. In a homiletic sense, the word haChodesh (this month) is related to haChidush (this renewal). The moon drifts further and further away from the sun, becoming smaller and smaller, until we think it has disappeared. And yet, it comes back, renewed and refreshed. Our righteous women symbolize this power of renewal in the Jewish people. Therefore, it was only right that the women be given Rosh Chodesh as their own private holiday.

One can take this concept further; the whole physiological make up of a woman is based on renewal. Their monthly cycle is testimonial to this. At a certain time of the month they are able to mimic G-d and create. When opportunity is missed, the body rejuvenates itself and they try again. This power to create was not trusted upon men; it was the women that have the power physically and in all the other aspects that comes with it.

TODAY’S MODERN WOMAN

Lubavich headquarters gathering of women teachers all over the world

Women were given the privilege of being the makers of Jewish homes. The Hebrew word for “homemaker” is “akeret habayit”.

“Akeret” is the feminine version of “ikar”, which is the “central aspect”, or “the essence of something”. “Bayit” usually means “house” or “home.” The Temple that stood in Jerusalem was called the “Beit HaMikdash”, “beit” meaning “house of” and “hamikdash” literally meaning “holiness”. Often, it is referred to simply as “HaBayit,” “the House”. Thus, in Hebrew the same word is used for both a “home” and “the Holy Temple”. In fact, the purpose of a “home” is to be a “mikdash me’at,” a “miniature sanctuary”.

For an akeret habayit, there is no contradiction between valuing her central position in the home and developing her interests outside of it. A traditional Jewish woman who works outside the home considers herself every bit an akeret habayit as a woman who stays home. There is no “housewife” versus “career woman” dichotomy… In “Eishet Chayil,” the prayer that is recited at theFriday night Shabbat table-the ideal woman is described as an expert businesswoman.

Over thousands of years, girls were educated at home, by their mothers. However, the western world proved to be difficult to maintain the spiritually enthusiastic Eshet chail. It wasn’t until Sarah Schenirer, who was a pioneer of Jewish education for girls. In 1917 establishing the Beis Yaakov school network in Poland. She saw girls being uneducated in basic Torah knowledge to an extent that they desecrated the Sabbath. Schenirer started to give classes in her workshop (she was a seamstress). The main goal of the schools was “to train Jewish daughters so that they will serve the Lord with all their might and with all their hearts; so that they will fulfill the commandments of the Torah with sincere enthusiasm”.

How important it is for a Jewish girl today to have a strong Torah education. If today’s women only knew the important role they have in maintaining the Jewish home, if they only knew their lone role to renew, to reinvigorate hope, they would approach life with a strong vigor. Rosh Chodesh is the Jewish woman’s holiday; it’s a time for her to celebrate the unique qualities she has, the unique qualities in maintaining the bait-house of G-d and raise banners by giving it over to the future generations by properly raising children in Torah environment who will continue the strong chain of our nation to continue to serve G-d and thus merit even more of G-d’s love and protection!

Do not covet your neighbor’s house, wife, car and state of the art barbecue grill

February 5, 2015 avimatmon Uncategorized No comments

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Pinchas Winston, Yossi Bilus, Yissachar Frand, Noach Isaac Oelbaum and Dr. Abba Goldman

The tenth of the Asserret HaDibrot [“Ten Commandments”] is Lo Tachmod: “Do not covet your neighbor’s house; do not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his slave, his donkey, his ox, or anything that belongs to your neighbor” [Shmot 20:13]. A person is not allowed to be jealous of his friend’s possessions.

There are three categories of expression — thought, speech and deed. In Jewish tradition, controlling one’s actions is the simplest level of self-control and observance. Speech is a little harder. Thought, such an internal, personal level of expression, is the hardest of all.

How is it possible to control one’s desires? It’s even more mindboggling that one would be violating the Torah if he is jealous of his friend’s purchase of a brand new car. Does that translate to us receiving severe punishment for the feeling? After all it’s a Torah violation and those are strict!! How can the Torah legislate against a person’s desires? It is very natural for a person driving a jalopy to be jealous of a person who has a new car and does not have to worry about leaking oil and whether the car will start each time he turns the key in the ignition.

If this is readily understandable in terms of our neighbor’s car, it is certainly understandable in terms of more meaningful things in life. We see other’s children more obedient, successful and perhaps accepting Jewish values more readily. Our perception is that our neighbors are living in bliss, happily married, while we look at our marriage as difficult. We see our neighbor’s families, we see their position, etc. How does the Torah command a person not to be jealous?

Granted, we learned in Torah 101 (beginner’s class) that desiring what others have is wrong. Everyone is tailor-made for his lot in life. G-d gives each one of us what we need materialistically and whom – wife, children, etc. (or lack of) – to make us better people. However that feeling, of desiring what our neighbor’s have, although diminished because of our Torah knowledge, is still apparent. What is the antidote so that we don’t desire other’s possessions, spouses etc.?

To be eighteen again is a wonderful thought. You have that youthful strength and energy but are now considered an adult though, by and large, you’re still supported by your fairly young parents. As a matter of fact, I’ve asked many men “What was the best years of your life?” and most guys of middle age, pointed to when they were young adults, before marriage years. Not that marriage is bad but it adds a huge responsibility of making a living – one might even label it the curse of Adam-ZE’AT APEHA-sweat of your brow.

A group of young adults were enjoying a cold wintery Sunday afternoon at Central Park when one of the young men spotted an attractive girl on the other side of the frozen lake. Being that age, when feelings for girls are at full bloom and difficult to control, the young man expressed his desire to put on his skates, which he had in his dufflebag so he could skate across the lake to meet that girl. Very often at that age one takes risks to satisfy one’s new found desires and tend to leap into situations, negating the danger involved, and so that’s exactly what he did.

As the young man was zooming half way across the lake, anticipating his conquest, he noticed a hole in the ice which he couldn’t manage to avoid and fell into the icy water. He immediately scraped at the ice with all his might; his life hanging in the balance.

From this parable we see the antidote for desire. As the young man anticipates his unfortunate doom, does he still have the desire for the girl across the lake? Fear has instantly grabbed this boy’s emotions. With the element of fear the young man sees, however briefly, the situation a bit more different and perhaps a bit more clearer. Gone is the desire; regret has set in. As a matter of fact, the word for fear in Hebrew is the same as the word for seeing – yireh. One sees with clarity; his perceptions are magnified when in fear. Perhaps, for this reason it is written in the Torah:
Now, Israel, what does G-d, your G-d, ask of you? Only to fear G-d, your G-d … (Devarim 10:12) These words are a central part of Moshe, our leader’s farewell address to the Jewish people on the last day of his life

The Talmud reiterates this point:

All is in the hands of Heaven except fear of Heaven, as it says, “Now, Israel, what does G-d, your G-d, ask of you? Only to fear ….” (Devarim 10:12) … Rebi Chanina said in the name of Rebi Shimon bar Yochai: The Holy One, Blessed is He, only has fear of G-d in His storehouse, as it says, “Fear of G-d is His storehouse” (Yeshayahu 33:6). (Brochot 33b)
Why is fear so important? Is it possible to manufacture fear? Ba’al Peor, one of the leading idols that people worshiped in Biblical times because of its rebellious streak against natural society (one would defecate on the idol), actually originated as a fear religion. When one is in tremendous fear what very frequently happens is loss of control of one’s bowel. This is how they worshiped their idol; by emotionally manufacturing the fear element.
Does one create that feeling when his neighbor’s child gives birth to a baby boy and he’s jealous? That’s insane!!
In order to understand how fear works let us examine a key element how we became a nation.

There were two people who led the Jewish midwives in going against Pharaoh’s orders of murdering the Jewish babies. Yocheved and Miriam possessed many beautiful character traits including, faith in G-d, kindness, an unwavering belief in a better future and courage in the face of adversity. But none of these traits is mentioned in the Torah. Instead the text tells us: “…it was because the midwives feared G-d that He made them houses” (Shemos 1:21) and “…the midwives feared G-d and they did not do as the king of Egypt spoke to them, and they caused the boys to live” (Shemos 1:17).

The “houses” – G-d’s reward to the midwives for their perfect fear of Him -were the dynasties of Priests (Kehunah) and Levites (Leviah) who served in the Temple, as well as Kings (Malchut), including the House of King David, for Yocheved and Miriam, respectively. Why is “fear of G-d” seen as the source of the midwives’ behavior and why is it considered so fundamental to the Jewish greatness they embody?

Our sages tell us that when a person leaves this world, G-d asks him six questions including, “were you honest in business, did you study Torah, did you wait for the Messiah?” If a person is on the level that he can truly respond “yes” to all six questions, he is then asked, “were you G-d-fearing?” If he says “no,” he is told that all six previous answers are worthless without the fear of G-d. This seems somewhat bewildering. Why are six accomplishments insignificant in the face of this one specific failure?

It’s important to add another element in order to truly understand the definition of fear. Let us examine the story of Avimelech, the king of Gerar who kidnapped Sarah, the wife of Avraham, our forefather, for himself after being told by Avraham that she was only his sister.
However, before he could lay a hand on her, G-d spoke to him and revealed her true status, which shook Avimelech up when he realized how close he had come to committing adultery. However, in his defense the Torah writes:

Avimelech had not approached her, so he said, “G-d, will you slay a nation even though it is righteous?” (Bereishis 20:4)
Righteous? How could he have called himself or his nation righteous? Even had Sarah really been Avraham’s sister, did she consent to being taken by Avimelech? Had Avraham agreed to her abduction? As Avraham later told an upset Avimelech, he had lied about Sarah:

“Because I said, `There is but no fear of G-d in this place and they will kill me because of my wife’.” (Bereishis 20:11)
But, how did Avraham know this? What had he seen during his short stay in such a booming metropolis that indicated to him that all that was missing from such an advanced place was yireh Shamayaim-fear of G-d?
This is what Rashi says Avraham asked Avimelech:

When a stranger arrives in a city, do people ask him about what he would like to eat or to drink, or do they ask him about his wife? (Rashi, Bereishis 20:11).
In other words, Avraham reproved Avimelech by saying:

“If your people are going to ask me about anything at all, it should be about my needs. If they ask about my relationship to the woman accompanying me, then it is evident that they are not G-d-fearing people! G-d-fearing people act in a Godly manner, and if they do not, then you know they will do whatever they want to achieve their own goals, including kill me for my wife.”
Thus, according to Rashi, it is fear of G-d that allows one to put the requirements of others before their own personal needs. Hence the verse, regarding Yocheved and Miriam, says:

The midwives feared G-d, and disobeyed the king of Egypt, saving the children. (Shemos 1:17)
This is the underlying reason it explicitly stated that the mid-wives feared G-d!!
However what does the fear of G-d have to do with doing good to others? One of the key elements in fearing G-d is respect for his creation. This is perfectly illustrated by this parable:

When the king’s son is amongst the people everybody will give him the utmost respect because if not, it will be reported to the king. Then they will pay the consequences. He can be the biggest brat and still the people have to treat him in the most delicate way. Everyone is born with a mission in life and has the stamp of the king. The fear of the heavens will keep your relationships in check and your eyes to yourself. Your friends and neighbors are the King’s children. As long as we have fear of the heavens then there will be clarity, a vision untainted by desires.

Hence, what transpires is that if one has fear of G-d he will eventually have respect for his fellow man. There will be no jealousy out of fear. That covers both sides of the 10 commandments. One through five, the first side, is between man and G-d. Six to ten is between Man and his relationship with his fellow man.
For this reason G-d proclaimed “Now, Israel, what does G-d, your G-d, ask of you? Only to fear ….”

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