Tag Archive for King Shaul

Is it possible to dance at two weddings?

December 3, 2015 Uncategorized No comments
This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Noach Isaac Oelbaum, Yissachar Frand, Asher Hurtzberg, Yossi Bilius


There is an expression in Hebrew, ‘You can’t dance at two weddings.’ I`m assuming it’s referring to the fact that you can’t be in two places at the same time or wear two different hats, two different faces; be yourself. Well I think that might be contrary to an interesting concept in our Torah, as it might be a necessity to make crucial adjustments in our personality to succeed in life.

The innocent, wet behind the ears yeshiva boy tricks his father into getting the bracha. In this week’s parsha we have one of the most bizarre twists in our holy Torah. Yitzchak, the elderly blind patriarch, expects to give the blessing to his eldest son Eisav. However, Yaacov intervenes, enters his father’s quarters, leads Yitchak to believe he is Eisav and steals the bracha. Perhaps, we presumably can learn that when opportunity knocks on our door, it requires us, at times, to conquer it at any cost? The goal is to be winners in the game of life. We have to be ruthless and stop at nothing to get what we want!! Life is not so easy. Much of the time, climbing the ladder of success seems like an uphill battle so we have to resort to desperate measures. Is that what we learn?

Strangely, Yaacov is perceived as a man of EMET-truth. Boy, it seems like the Torah has a different set of rules then…..Hey wait a minute!! The Torah is the prime source. It is the rule book. The measuring stick of all. Yaacov’s transformation in using trickery seems alarmingly out of character. What else does he have up his sleeve, besides a furry animal hide to make his Eisav costume look authentic? Actually, we notice, he is quite uncomfortable in the role. Why does he have to go through the agony? Why does he have to go through the mascaraed? What is the lesson that the Torah is trying to teach us?

One may notice that there is a pattern in our holy Torah, where we find a temporary transformation of character. Time after time, story after story, many of our heroes are transformed. It’s repeated to teach us a lesson. It’s a vital lesson in life, for we too are often confronted with having to play an undesirable role, a different part and therefore we must know how to survive.

Let us examine a number of our holy ancestors and perhaps we can make sense of how and why the Torah presented the incident of Yaacov in the manner it did.

King Shaul was the first king our nation had. Unfortunately, he was perceived as a tragic figure for he failed to make an important adjustment while Yaacov and Avraham succeeded in dealing with changes that had to be made. This cost him the kingdom.

At the time of the exodus from Egypt, Amalek traveled hundreds of miles to ambush the newly freed nation in the hope of destroying them. We, as a nation, did not pose any threat to their sovereignty. They lived to the east of Canaan and were not among the Seven Nations occupying Eretz Yisroel. Nevertheless, their irrational hatred against G-d and us compelled them to attack a harmless and seemingly defenseless nation. In the aftermath of their attack we were commanded to always remember the evil that is Amalek.
In the year 2883 – 878 b.c.e., King Shaul was sent by G-d to destroy the nation of Amalek. Agag was their king, and it was a singular moment in history when every member of Amalek was in one place at the same time. A window of opportunity had arrived. The king had a mission. Shaul, as per Shmuel Hanavi’s instructions, was successful in destroying Amalek. However, Shaul had mercy and allowed the king, Agag, to remain alive, as well as the captured cattle. The commentaries state that in the interim, Agag was able to impregnate a maidservant, from which the nation of Amalek would survive. G-d told Shmuel that Shaul’s neglect of His command to totally destroy Amalek must result in Shaul losing the right to be king. Despite Shmuel’s prayers for mercy, Hashem didn’t relent, and Shmuel went to tell Shaul of G-d’s punishment.
This grave sin of Shaul came back to haunt our people. The connection to Purim is well documented. Haman, the second in command of the Persian Empire, is called, “the Agagi”. He was a direct descendent of Agag. Haman wanted to annihilate Israel.

In accepting G-d’s mercy and justice, we are forced to acknowledge our limited understanding. The notion of killing men, women and children is thankfully foreign and cruel to us. Nevertheless, Shaul was commanded to wipe out the entire nation.

When Shaul finally realized his sin, Shaul explains that the reason he spared the Amalek animals is because that is what the people wanted. Shmuel responds harshly to Shaul, “Even if you are small in your own eyes, you are the leader of the Tribes of Israel.” This is not the time or place for modesty. True, that is your natural inclination and normally it is a good inclination, but your particular mission in life at this time is to rise above that. This mission was something Shaul failed to accomplish and as a result he was stripped of the monarchy.

‘Shaul was compassionate to the enemy and he was cruel to his own people.’ This is in reference to the eighty kohanim he killed who gave David shelter.
On the other hand, at the end of the chapter, Shmuel asks that the Agag, King of Amalek be brought before him. Agag, when brought before Shmuel, proclaimed, “Truly the bitterness of death has passed.” (Achen sar mar hamaves) [Pasuk 32]

Most commentaries interpret Agag’s ambiguous remark to be a resignation to the fact that his time was now up. He no longer has to fear the bitterness of death because death was now upon him. However, the Ralbag interprets differently. The Ralbag says that Agag was saying the reverse. When he saw the Shmuel HaNavi, he proclaimed: “Now, I am spared. This is my lucky day. I am not going to be killed!”

The Ralbag explains that in encountering Shmuel’s countenance, Agag was impressed with his great compassion and mercy. He said to himself, “This man is the epitome of gentleness and kindness. Such a person will never kill me.”

But Shmuel looked straight at Agag and proclaimed, “Just as your sword made women childless, so shall your mother be childless among the women.” “And Shmuel split (vayeshasef) Agag before Hashem in Gilgal.” [Pasuk 33] The verb vayeshasef means he cut up Agag in four pieces. This gentle and frail prophet first cut Agag in half with a sword and then cut him again down the middle into four pieces.

What happened to Shmuel’s gentleness? What happened to his compassion? This was the occasion in his life when his mission called for him to overcome his natural inclination. He had to act in a way that was different than he would normally be inclined to act. He had to go beyond who he was to satisfy G-d’s Will.

Our purpose in this world is to do what we need to do, despite who we are. Shmuel met his challenge to do that. Shaul did not.

The message of having to be forced to use the opposite character trait to perform mitzvoth is found clearly with the patriarch we call Mr. Chessed (kindness), Avraham. In the beginning of Parshat Vayera we find Avraham, in the piercing heat, waiting for guests despite just being circumcised. Hachnasat orchim- receiving guests was his trademark. His compassion for his fellow human being was unprecedented. Interestingly at the end of the very same parsha we find Avraham doing what many would consider cruel savagery as he was prepared to slaughter his son. Avraham at that very moment turned off his Ahava-love of G-d and turned on his fear of G-d. The ability to transform from his natural instinct and natural character is quite commendable.

G-d tells Avraham, “Now I know that you are G-d fearing.”(22,12.) Avraham was a tzadic before. What is G-d referring to when he mentions, “Now I know”? The Vilna Goan teaches us that Man is not complete until he performs two opposite character traits for good. If he only performs one he is not considered a tzadic.

It’s easy to perform kindness when your natural instincts are compassion. The same applies to Yaacov, whose honesty is second nature, and would find lying appalling and nauseating.

The Torah does not provide specific reward for its commandments with the exception of two: Honor your father and your mother, and Shiluach Haken – to send away the mother bird first when one wants to take the chicks or the eggs. Regarding both mitzvoth the Torah says he will enjoy long life.

There is not a mitzvah of more chessed then taking care of parents, especially old and cranky parents. What is the old expression? One parent can take care of ten kids; however, ten children can’t take care of one parent? The chessed is enormous; it’s performed daily. However, there is no crueler commandment then Sheluach hakan. This is the ultimate cruelty. Imagine, shooing the mother bird and taking her chicks! The Torah, though, links the two commandments. They are polar opposites but share the same reward. The Torah teaches us one can do a mitzvah with two traits quite the opposite of each other and get the same reward. There is no such thing as a bad trait, whether it be anger, jealousy, or even murder. Every trait can be used for either good or evil.

Yaacov used his tools to the utmost. When the situation demanded, when he was dealing with a Lavan, he told Lavan, “I am your match in trickery. You cannot pull a fast one on me.”

Yitchak loved Eisav, whose job it was to take care of his younger brother. Eisav was outgoing; he was street smart; no one could pull the wool under his eyes. Yaacov, on the other hand, was learning in Yeshiva presumably for the rest of his life. This is perfectly acceptable for the world needs goodness in the highest level. Rivka knew better. She knew Eisav not only wouldn’t be able to take care of Yaacov but he wouldn’t be able to manage himself. His evil inclination was dominating him. Yitchak, shockingly, realized after Yaacov tricked him, “How in the world did he pull that one off? I didn’t know he had it in him, that he had the qualification to be great and lead the world.” Yaacov used trickery – the polar opposite of EMET – to get the bracha. In order to grow in the world one has to go against his nature even though it’s very difficult. If one believes in something he must get it done any which way possible using all his tools in the tool box. One has to learn to dance at two weddings.

JERUSALEM – THE UNITED CITY
Every one of us has a connection to the land of Israel. When we do go to the holy land, it’s pretty much a given – a visit to Jerusalem is expected. One feels spiritually uplifted, especially when visiting the KOTEL.
This week, Yaakov, our forefather has the “famous dream”. He camps out in this PLACE. The famous place is where the Temple mount stands, today. Yaakov takes twelve little stones and surrounds them around himself as he’s about to go to sleep. When he gets up the next morning, the twelve stones have become one. According to the Zohar this stone became the foundation where the world stands and it runs deep inside the earth under the Temple mount.
Our TORAH HAKEDOSHA can be understood on many levels. One level is using “the same word” method. There were evil people in the time of Avraham, who build a tower, so they can climb way up and destroy G-d. Although their intentions were bad, the fact that they were united – they were not destroyed! However, even though G-d loves unity, it was for the wrong reasons and any unity for the wrong reasons doesn’t last!
The scripture describes the tower in Parshat Noach by stating: ” VE ROSHO BA SHAMAYIM- its head is in the sky”. In this week’s parsha when Yaakov dreams, he dreams of a ladder and its head reaches the sky – VE ROSHO (there’s that word again) MAGIYA SHAMAYMA.
The Sages learn from it that there are two unities: one ROSHO – for evil and one ROSHO – for G-d. This spot, where the Temple mount is located and where the first and second stood, and where the future third Temple will stand. As long as the Jews are united for the right reasons, the Temple will be built. The twelve stones represent the twelve tribes of Israel united, fused together by one central being, G-d. This place -MAKOM – the temple is a representation of unity and peace. There was never any metal allowed to enter into the Temple because metal represents war. Our Shabbat table in many ways represents an altar that was an important vehicle in the temple. Many communities have the tradition to take the metal knives off the table when the grace after meal is recited. We do this to show a sign of peace, a sign of unity.
The united city doesn’t mean being united with other countries. It’s a place where all the Jews are supposed to be united. When we are unified then we will be allowed to build the Temple and live there in peace! May we see the rebuilding of the Third Temple in our times very soon!

 

Appreciating What One Does for You

January 20, 2014 Hakarat Hatov, Jewish Values, Tzniut- Modesty No comments
            The King of the Jewish nation, Shaul, felt threatened by David who became very popular by winning one of the most lop-sided one-on-one battles in history, by beating the giant and heavily favorite, the ferocious Goliath. Goliath represented one of Israel’s archrivals, the Philistines. It was a tremendous show of courage and David became an instant hero. David was from the tribe of Yehuda where the kings were to be chosen from. Shaul, who came from the tribe of Benjamin, knew inevitably someone from Yehuda would become king. Later the prophet Shmuel anointed David the future king of Israel, which infuriated the present king. Shaul’s animosity became so great toward David that he wanted to kill him. However, as time went on, David became stronger, gathering up men to join him. In one of the more famous incidences in the Tanach (Prophets), David snuck up to where Shaul was sleeping, who was in the midst of chasing him, and cut Shaul’s garment. By demonstrating this act and showing it to him later, he wanted to be clear, as to convey that he has no hostility toward Shaul and how easily it would have been to kill him.’ I have no ill will toward you’; perhaps, Shaul should soften his stance towards him.
       It’s most puzzling that when David who was on his deathbed, he could not keep warm; he was constantly cold and no garment could make him comfortable. Apparently, he was being punished for cutting the garment of Shaul. But why? David wanted to make a point of strength; he wanted to make peace between them. Perhaps Shaul was humiliated, but, even so, it was not intended to be a malice act. Why was he punished so severely?
        In this week’s Parsha, we find Yaacov wanting to marry Rachel. He knew though, that her father, who has a reputation of a cheat, might trick him. Therefore, he gives Rachel signs that when implemented will ensure that indeed it would be Rachel he’s marrying. However, Rachel gives over the signs to her sister Leah, stating ‘I do not want my sister humiliated when Lavan’s plans foil and Yaacov discovers it’s Leah who he’s marrying and not me’.
       By Rachel giving over the signs, it fortified the marriage between Yaacov and Leah and through that union producing six out of the twelve tribes. In essence, Rachel sacrificed her having all of the twelve tribes because she did not want her sister Leah to be humiliated.
        The question Rabbi Olbaum asks, ‘I understand there’s no street lights and it’s properly pitch dark, but didn’t Yaacov realize it’s not Rachel he’s with? Even the breathing of a person is recognizable. If Yaacov was so careful with the signs, then wouldn’t he be as diligent and on the alert at this crucial juncture too? Nevertheless, the next morning he was surprised. How can that be?
       Our sages teach us that Rachel’s virtue was modesty, to such an extent that the sensitive Yaacov wasn’t able to discover and recognize her scent and voice. This characteristic of Rachel’s embracement of modesty enabled Leah to be saved. If it were any other woman, she would have been discovered. Clothing is the face of modesty; it creates a barrier from sinning. David, who is the descendant of Leah (from the tribe of Yehuda) cut the garment of Shaul (from the descendants of Rachel).
       In essence, you cut the hand that feeds you. If it weren’t for Rachel, where would Leah be? The modesty of Rachel saved Leah. David targeted one of the strengths of Shaul who also practiced, and was known for modesty, just like his ancestor. Seemingly, this lack of respect was a grave sin.
       We see modesty is one of the building blocks of Judaism and clothing is its vehicle. One of the reasons a Jew wears a Talit or Tzitzit is because it is a spiritual garment in which G-d gave us. It too is a garment that represents the foundation of Judaism to the highest degree.

The Art of Adapting to New Times

October 27, 2013 MUSSAR HASKEL/ A Lesson No comments
Taken from the discourse of Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz, also contributing Rabbi Yossi Bilus
There are many lessons one can learn from the famous story of Choni Ha’magal however there is one very important teaching in particular which stands out in connection to this week’s parsha, Chayeh Sarah.
Firstly, what’s the story of Choni?
          We all heard of “Rip Van Winkle”. It’s a fictional tale by the American author Washington Irving published in 1819. I guess one can consider the short story as part of classic American literature. As a matter of fact, there have been many similar stories in history from other countries and cultures. I guess there is something irresistible about taking long naps for an extended period that has the reader curious. However they’re all revised copies of the ancient Jewish story about Choni Ha’magal found in the Talmud (Ta’anit 23A).
          Even popular kids cartoon characters like Fred Flintstone, Mr. Magoo, Bugs Bunny and many others all had their episodes of falling into a lengthy sleep, based on the story of Rip Van Winkle, or more accurately, Choni Ha’magal. That’s how popular the story is. Reading the passage in the Gemara for the first time one can not help but to think of times of youth and having seen a similar script by Hanna Barbara Productions or throughout Loony tunes.

A Little Background
Choni Ha’magal (the circle-maker) was given this nickname due to another incident in his life, in which he pleaded with God to bring rain. He drew a circle around his feet and exclaimed that he was not going to leave the circle until G-d brought rain. It rained! Clearly, Choni was a great scholar.
          The prophet Jeremiah (Jeremiah 29:10) promised, “The Lord says, ‘After seventy years for Babylon have been completed, I will remember you, and I will fulfill for you, My favorite, a promise to return you to this place.’ ” The Babylonian exile lasted for seventy years, during which time the Jewish people were living in a foreign land and were subservient to their hosts.
Text 1 – Babylonian Talmud Ta’anit 23b

His whole life he pondered the verse, (Psalms 126:1)
 “A song of ascent, when God returns us to Zion, we were like dreamers.”
          Can someone sleep for seventy years?
          One day he (Choni) was walking along the road when he came across a man who was planting a carob tree. He asked him, “These Carob trees, how long does it take them to producefruit?””Seventy years,” replied the man.
          “Are you so certain that you are going to live for another seventy years?”
          “I found this world with carob trees growing in it; in the same way that my
ancestors planted for me, so will I plant for my children.”
          Choni fell asleep, and slept for seventy years. When he woke up he saw a man gathering carobs from the tree. “Are you the man who planted this tree? he (Choni) asked.
“I am his grandson.” “I must have slept for seventy years,” said Choni to himself. He saw that his donkey had given birth to a whole herd of donkeys. Choni went to his house. “Is Choni’s son here?” he asked. “His son is no longer alive, but his grandson is here,” they replied to him. “I am Choni Ha’magal” he told them. They did not believe him.
          He went to the Beit Midrash (study hall) and he heard the Rabbis say, “Things are so clear today, like in the days of Choni Ha’magal, that every question that the Rabbis had, he knew the answer to it.”
           “I am he,” said Choni. The Rabbis did not believe him and they did not respect him even though his knowledge of Torah was great. He said if I don’t have a companion in expressing myself, it’s not worth to live.
          He was weakened and he asked God to have mercy on him, and he died.
There are many questions on this Gemara however let’s focus on Choni’s mental well being throughout the whole episode.
          Choni was transported to the future. He was not recognized but he was remembered, fondly, as a historical figure. Everybody immediately recognized the name Choni and revered it. However, they did not connect nor believe that the man in front of them was in fact Choni. This happened both in his home and in the study hall.
          We see from here that Choni had a past (people knew his name) and he had a future (he had grandchildren and his name lived on in his scholarly teachings), however – he had no present! He could not connect; he could not adapt to the present in which he was placed.
          The adapting mechanism in him did not work and it led to his demise.

          Why didn’t it work?
Many of these aspects are comparisons about life. Perhaps one should put this also on the list:
One can compare life to sitting in a moving vehicle as he sees the places, neighborhoods and people pass him by. He remembers where he began and he knows his destination. The mind registers and adapts to the journey as he gets closer and closer to the end.

          In life, one must learn to adapt to a situation, whether it be work, school, marriage, birth, death, diet, or any relationships with others or one’s self. No matter how harsh living conditions may be, no matter how difficult the environment, no matter how irritating or obnoxious the person, a human being is able to adapt and survive. But, we shall shortly learn from the teaching of Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz, that there is an important ingredient, which should be infused in the process of adapting, in order for it to be successful.

          I t is this message, which will clarify for us the difference between Abraham’s reaction to G-d’s command to bring his son Yitzchak as a sacrifice, as opposed to that of his wife Sarah. Abraham was eager to fulfill G-d’s command. Sarah, on the other hand, when she heard what had transpired, could not bear the news, and died instantly. How can two great people have reacted so differently to the same event? What makes this question even more puzzling, was that Sarah was on a higher level then her husband in prophecy.

          The answer is that Abraham was made aware in a gradual manner that Yitzchak was to be brought as a sacrifice, thus allowing his feelings and emotions to adapt to the challenge awaiting him. G-d told him ‘Take your son’ then ‘your only son whom you love’. Only then did he inform him that Yitzchak was to be sacrificed. So maybe, if Abraham had been confronted suddenly that it was Yitzchak who was to be sacrificed, he would not have survived. It was the gradual realization of this fact that made it easier for him to digest this. He was therefore able to perform G-d’s command. Such was not the case with Sarah who was suddenly overwhelmed by the realization of what had happened and died from the shock.

          Another example of how delicate and gradual one must be, is G-d’s reaction after Adam sinned by eating from the tree of knowledge. G-d appeared close to Adam and asked ‘Where are you?’ G-d knew where Adam was, but He wanted to confront him in a manner that he would not be startled. The guilt of his sin was overwhelming; any sudden confrontation would have emotionally destroyed Adam.
          Let’s not forget Serach bat Asher, the granddaughter of our father Yaacov, who played the harp singing ‘Yosef (his favorite son who was presumed dead for 22 years) is still alive and living in Egypt’. The overwhelming sudden joy would have been proven too much and might have killed him. Serach presented it in a delicate, clever, gradual way in which Yaacov was able to comprehend without the shocking affect.
          The Gemarah (Sotah13a) states that soon after Yaacov’s death, seventeen years later, when Yaacov’s sons were taking his body to the Cave of Machpela for burial, a confrontation took place between his sons and his evil brother Eisav. Eisav came and protested that the plot of land (Cave of Machpela) belonged to him. A debate ensued and it was decided that one of the brothers would return to Egypt and retrieve the deed to show that Yaacov indeed owned the property.

          A deaf grandson Chushim (son of Naftali) wondered, why the cause of the delay? When they communicated with him, he exclaimed ‘What? Our grandfather will lie in degradation until the deed is brought?’ whereupon he immediately killed Eisav.

          Why was Chushim, a grandson, more concerned about Yaacov’s honor than Yaacov’s own sons? Rav Chaim answers, all the brothers had been slowly drawn into the argument with Eisav, gradually dulling their sensitivity to their father’s shame. Chushim, being deaf, was completely unaware of the situation. When he realized the reason for the delay, he could not contain his anger and killed Eisav.
          At times, yours truly likes to compare the different periods of my life. I was in the front porch of my house, one Sunday afternoon and saw my neighbors and their kids playing with mine. I couldn’t help but to compare the cast of characters in my life now and when I was a child or as a teenager. For the most part, with a few exceptions I’m surrounded with new people. Some are not with us anymore and others are scattered all over the world. If I didn’t have the transitional memories in between the two times of my life, I would feel as if those periods in my life never occurred.
            I once spoke to my cousin in Israel on the phone as I was walking in my current neighborhood in Queens. I had very little contact with this cousin since childhood but for a brief couple of seconds, listening to his voice, I thought I was back in Israel on my summer vacations as a child. The transformation was exhilarating!!

One has to be aware of the delicate nature of man. He has to approach situations gradually. Furthermore, man must be aware and use his most powerful tool, that of speech, properly by delivering news, whether good or bad, gradually. This will allow those listening to be able to hear and giving them a chance to adapt and tolerate what they are being told..

          Even when one gets up in the morning, one needs time before getting out of bed. Even the Sages agree. There was a study taken where the body and mind need about 12 seconds to adapt. It’s funny that the prayer that is said in the morning, MODEH ANI, has 12 words. One second for each word, using the proper concentration, gives the mind and body time to adapt from a state of sleeping and lying down to one of being awake and standing/moving.

          Choni was placed in a situation where he could not adapt. He could not relate to his new surroundings. Perhaps the seventy years lapse was too taxing on his mental state.

          It’s inevitable that we will go through changes in life. People will come in to our lives and others will depart. Change has to be done gradually.
          When King Shaul was informed by the Prophet Shmuel that G-d is removing him from being king, his response to Shmuel was a bit peculiar. He said “Let me address the people one more time as king”. He wanted to digest the verdict of G-d gradually and descend from the position.
          We must deal with change in a delicate way. Granted, adapting is part of life. If we are aware of its pitfalls, allowing ourselves the time and effort to adapt, we will be at a tremendous advantage.

The Secret is Esther

August 27, 2013 Purim No comments

It was pretty obvious that Esther was destined to be the queen. Mordechai spent all the effort required to prevent this and tried to hide her from being exposed. The name Esther means hidden. What’s puzzling is that many commentaries say that she was not Mordachai’s niece but actually his wife.

 

There are two important hints that Sages are disclosing to us about Esther. She is the descendant of King Shaul and the comparison to our matriarch Sarah, Abraham’s wife.

 

The Sages bring an interesting passage relating the time when she prays to G-d in which she beseeches:

 

“My G-d you have forsaken me. Why have the order of the world and the order of the matriarchs changed to go against me? Sarah was held captive and Pharaoh was punished. I have been placed in the bosom of a wicked man all these years and you have made no miracles for me”.

 

Ester was Queen over 127 countries, the same amount of years that Sarah lived. Sarah was taken from her husband, however was saved from living with Pharaoh. Esther was not. For whatever reason, the soul of Sarah which might very well be Esther had to go through the torture of living with a barbaric king.

 

The connection to her ancestor, King Shaul, is revealed when Mordechai informs Esther to go to the king now. She protests and says he didn’t call me. No one goes to the king without being called. Mordechai answers in a most unusual way and says that if you don’t go, someone else will  be the one chosen to do this important mission. You and your ancestors will be lost.

 

Esther was the secret weapon to fix the mistake of her ancestor, King Shaul, who did not kill off all of the Amalekim (the nation that’s an enemy to the Jews). She has now come to kill off Haman who is from the genealogy of Amalek.

Parshat Ki Tetzei

August 18, 2013 Highlights on the Weekly Parsha No comments
First Portion
* In war-times, on the battlefield, tasting the forbidden fruit is even harder to resist than usual. This is perhaps the reason the Torah concedes and permits the unthinkable, marrying a gentile woman! (As long as certain conditions are met). Why is a soldier at the front different than the ordinary Joe? One may add, as we discussed earlier, war manifests the cruel nature in man. Dr. Goldman, psychologist at the Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim, says part of their mental training is to enable themselves to think “I’m dead to ones’ feelings”, robotically. Did one ever hear of the expression often said to a soldier “to suck it up”? He has to be man enough to take the severe pounding – to be numb to human feelings; he has to have that killer instinct. As a result from this training, therefore, a soldier loses sensitivity to people. He’ll get whatever he needs from the enemy, then he will neutralize them.  Another aspect why a soldier is singled out is the strong emotions of not knowing one’s fate at any given moment which prepares the soldier to act in the most intense way. This result of fear and hate are both common in the battle field and both could be taken to a unprecedented staggering extreme level. The Torah teaches us that most likely a soldier is not in control of his emotional state.  We see too often that exchanging one’s civilian clothes for an army uniform, frees a man from customary social restraints and permits laxity of morals. Therefore, the Torah hopes that once the gentile woman is permitted, the soldier’s passion will subside since the evil inclination loses strength as soon as the attraction is no longer forbidden. Also the fact, that he’s back home and the Torah takes steps to make her unattractive, both physically, in ancient times the gentiles would send their daughters to the battlefields beautifully dressed and made up, hoping to distract the enemy, and emotionally, the adjustment of separation from her family, would cool him off. It’s a lesson to us all about the forbidden fruits and the power of lust. The minute it is permitted, it loses its luster.
* Although the Torah hints earlier of a b’chor getting a double portion. Here, its emphasized and sets the tone of the first born inheritance.
Second Portion
* Here is the source that a man may not wear woman’s clothing and woman may not wear men’s clothing. There should be a clear distinction between the genders. Our sages ordained that a man may not pluck out white hairs, wear feminine jewelry, or shave off hair ordinarily removed by women. The Torah wishes to respect and uphold the distinction G-d made between the sexes.

Third Portion
* If a man has a child from an illicit affair with a married woman, that child is called a mamzer. Mamzer is from “mum zar” a strange defect. It’s a marriage that is strange among the Jewish people. This strange defect is derived from a man and a woman whose marriage can never be valid. An example is a brother and sister or other form of incest or what we mentioned above, a married woman who bore another man’s child. Contrary to popular misconception, a mamzer is not someone born out of wedlock. A mamzer can never marry into the Jewish race. They can only marry another mamzer. It’s vital that if a man and wife separate and no longer intend to live with each other and are pursuing another relationship, to get a “get” (Jewish divorce decree).

Fourth Portion
* One may not take interest from a fellow Jew.

Fifth Portion
* Its understood if a kohen divorces his wife, he cannot remarry her. The reason is he cannot marry a divorcee. But why does the Torah forbid a non-kohen from re-marrying his ex if she had married someone else after him?  The Torah takes modesty laws seriously. This prohibition precludes the possibility of prearrange exchange of wives under the mask of legality. Man’s nature is such where he wants to try someone else; the neighbor’s grass is greener. Our Sages, therefore, stress minimal contact among couples. One can have an amazing time going out with his wife but that’s where it should end. If one thinks he can hold himself back and boast I was raised in a co-ed society and I never had any thoughts of others.” Well, are you sure about that? Till this very day, some people fast after the concluding holidays of Pesach and Succot because of bad thoughts. In ancient times, there would be large crowds gathering at the Bet Hamikdash (Temple) where men and women would see each other, even if it was separate. Today as well, if one goes to an innocent Jewish concert, Baruch Hashem bli ein-hara, many of us know how to groom and take care of ourselves sometimes a bit too excessively. Well, people have thoughts.

Sixth portion
* If a man is newlywed, he cannot go to the army; he shall stay home for one year and gladden his wife. In order for one to be happy to the fullest, he has to make others happy. The first year of marriage is quite crucial in developing a bond between man and wife.

Seventh Portion
* Interesting, relatives are not responsible for their relatives’ sins. I guess I’m Jewish, I’m going to leave off with a unanswered question. King David was forced to take the offspring of Shaul, the previous king, who was killed in battle, and deliver them to the enemy in retribution for Shaul killing their people. Why did Shaul’s offspring get punished for the sins of their grandfather?