Tag Archive for Kohen/ Priest

Decisions That Impact Many

August 30, 2013 MUSSAR HASKEL/ A Lesson No comments

This week’s portion of the Torah we read about “If a Cohen’s (Priest’s) daughter has an adulterous affair, she defamed her father’s name, she should be put to death by burning”(21;9). We learn from Rav Henoch Leibowitz z”l who quotes the mainstream commentary Rashi, as he explains the verse above, she defamed and embarrassed her father’s honor, people would say on him ‘curse is the person who gave birth and curse is the person who raised such an individual’.

 

As we know, it was King David who laid the blueprints for the Bet Hamikdash (Temple). However, it was under King Solomon’s leadership that it was built. When King Solomon was married to the daughter of Pharaoh, one of his many wives, on the day of the inauguration of the long-awaited Temple, she caused him to oversleep. The entire nation was waiting for their King on this momentous occasion to lead the ceremony, not knowing that he was out of commission. Apparently, his mother, Batsheva, had a grasp on what was taking place. She had a sixth sense that mothers possess which led to her uneasy feeling. Mothers have a certain intuition about their children. (If I sneeze, my mother, who happened to be on the other side of town, will call me up and demand that I should put on my sweater.)

 

So Batsheva storms the King’s bedroom with the heel of her shoe in hand. She hits her son, King Solomon, scolding him ‘What are you doing? People would say I’m at fault for not raising you properly. They wouldn’t blame your father because he was a tzaddik. If you’re a rasha, they’ll blame me that I was the cause of your actions’. Perhaps we can deduce from the words of Batsheva. If the people did not believe David was a tzaddik, they would blame him for Solomon’s actions, even though David had been dead many years before the inauguration took place. Regardless, apparently the people would say that David did not give Solomon the proper education and this is the cause of his misstep. But the fact that David was a tzaddik, the blame would fall on his mother. The Gemarah deduces from what happens next during the inauguration ceremony; that whatever wrong King David did, G-d forgave him. This is evident from the mysteriously locked Temple doors, which would not open. Every effort was made by Shlomo and the sages to open the Temple, but it was to no avail, until Shlomo cried out to G-d ‘do it for the sake of my father, King David.’ With this cry, the doors opened.

 

Rav Leibowitz asks, why would anybody blame David or Batsheva for their son’s wrongdoings? At what point does an individual take responsibility for his own actions? Don’t you think at this stage of his life, he can make his own decisions? After all, he runs a kingdom; the Israelites at this juncture were considered a super power. We have to say this is human nature. People always link an individual’s negative and positive attributes to one’s parents. Even though one can argue that Shlomo didn’t do anything maliciously, David and Batsheva still would have felt slighted by their son’s actions, which would have been magnified in peoples’ eyes and would cause them embarrassment.

 

I know of an individual who was seeing a girl whom he was interested in marrying. Apparently, as the relationship got closer to the very serious state, it was disclosed that she had a relationship with a non-Jew. This was an issue; considering this person was a Cohen who cannot marry anyone who had such a relationship, he ended the relationship rationalizing, what would my ancestors say ‘you broke the family chain of Cohanim that goes back three thousand years because you’re in love’. This individual took tremendous pride of his Cohen status and of his family tradition. Today, he is performing his Cohen duties in synagogue along with his sons right by him.

 

Rav Leibowitz points out that Batsheva was more concerned in adding a sense of responsibility to Shlomo, than to her own personal pride. If one feels he is alone in sinning, he should think again. Many of his ancestors will be affected.

 

We conclude that any of our wrongdoings could be a violation of ‘honoring your father and your mother’ because it causes people to look negatively at our parents. Perhaps, if we are tempted to violate any laws, we should think twice because our parents’ honor is at stake.

Parshat Ki Tetzei

August 18, 2013 Highlights on the Weekly Parsha No comments
First Portion
* In war-times, on the battlefield, tasting the forbidden fruit is even harder to resist than usual. This is perhaps the reason the Torah concedes and permits the unthinkable, marrying a gentile woman! (As long as certain conditions are met). Why is a soldier at the front different than the ordinary Joe? One may add, as we discussed earlier, war manifests the cruel nature in man. Dr. Goldman, psychologist at the Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim, says part of their mental training is to enable themselves to think “I’m dead to ones’ feelings”, robotically. Did one ever hear of the expression often said to a soldier “to suck it up”? He has to be man enough to take the severe pounding – to be numb to human feelings; he has to have that killer instinct. As a result from this training, therefore, a soldier loses sensitivity to people. He’ll get whatever he needs from the enemy, then he will neutralize them.  Another aspect why a soldier is singled out is the strong emotions of not knowing one’s fate at any given moment which prepares the soldier to act in the most intense way. This result of fear and hate are both common in the battle field and both could be taken to a unprecedented staggering extreme level. The Torah teaches us that most likely a soldier is not in control of his emotional state.  We see too often that exchanging one’s civilian clothes for an army uniform, frees a man from customary social restraints and permits laxity of morals. Therefore, the Torah hopes that once the gentile woman is permitted, the soldier’s passion will subside since the evil inclination loses strength as soon as the attraction is no longer forbidden. Also the fact, that he’s back home and the Torah takes steps to make her unattractive, both physically, in ancient times the gentiles would send their daughters to the battlefields beautifully dressed and made up, hoping to distract the enemy, and emotionally, the adjustment of separation from her family, would cool him off. It’s a lesson to us all about the forbidden fruits and the power of lust. The minute it is permitted, it loses its luster.
* Although the Torah hints earlier of a b’chor getting a double portion. Here, its emphasized and sets the tone of the first born inheritance.
Second Portion
* Here is the source that a man may not wear woman’s clothing and woman may not wear men’s clothing. There should be a clear distinction between the genders. Our sages ordained that a man may not pluck out white hairs, wear feminine jewelry, or shave off hair ordinarily removed by women. The Torah wishes to respect and uphold the distinction G-d made between the sexes.

Third Portion
* If a man has a child from an illicit affair with a married woman, that child is called a mamzer. Mamzer is from “mum zar” a strange defect. It’s a marriage that is strange among the Jewish people. This strange defect is derived from a man and a woman whose marriage can never be valid. An example is a brother and sister or other form of incest or what we mentioned above, a married woman who bore another man’s child. Contrary to popular misconception, a mamzer is not someone born out of wedlock. A mamzer can never marry into the Jewish race. They can only marry another mamzer. It’s vital that if a man and wife separate and no longer intend to live with each other and are pursuing another relationship, to get a “get” (Jewish divorce decree).

Fourth Portion
* One may not take interest from a fellow Jew.

Fifth Portion
* Its understood if a kohen divorces his wife, he cannot remarry her. The reason is he cannot marry a divorcee. But why does the Torah forbid a non-kohen from re-marrying his ex if she had married someone else after him?  The Torah takes modesty laws seriously. This prohibition precludes the possibility of prearrange exchange of wives under the mask of legality. Man’s nature is such where he wants to try someone else; the neighbor’s grass is greener. Our Sages, therefore, stress minimal contact among couples. One can have an amazing time going out with his wife but that’s where it should end. If one thinks he can hold himself back and boast I was raised in a co-ed society and I never had any thoughts of others.” Well, are you sure about that? Till this very day, some people fast after the concluding holidays of Pesach and Succot because of bad thoughts. In ancient times, there would be large crowds gathering at the Bet Hamikdash (Temple) where men and women would see each other, even if it was separate. Today as well, if one goes to an innocent Jewish concert, Baruch Hashem bli ein-hara, many of us know how to groom and take care of ourselves sometimes a bit too excessively. Well, people have thoughts.

Sixth portion
* If a man is newlywed, he cannot go to the army; he shall stay home for one year and gladden his wife. In order for one to be happy to the fullest, he has to make others happy. The first year of marriage is quite crucial in developing a bond between man and wife.

Seventh Portion
* Interesting, relatives are not responsible for their relatives’ sins. I guess I’m Jewish, I’m going to leave off with a unanswered question. King David was forced to take the offspring of Shaul, the previous king, who was killed in battle, and deliver them to the enemy in retribution for Shaul killing their people. Why did Shaul’s offspring get punished for the sins of their grandfather?