Tag Archive for Sensitivity

Parshat Ki Tisa

“A Cup of Coffee 

 

&

A Quick Thought”

Steaming Cup of Coffee
Spark Of Jewish Experience
 Parshat Ki Tisa
March 8, 2012
14 Adar, 5772
Dear Friends,

 

HAPPY PURIM!!!!

 

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In This Issue
Parshat Ki Tisa Highlights
A Different Type of Hero
Show Me Your Glory
Are Colognes and Perfumes Allowed on Pesach?

Parshat Ki Tisa Highlights
First Portion

* ‘When you take a census of the Israelites, each man shall give a ransom for himself to G-d so the census does not lead to plague’ (11:12)

What’s the connection between plague and census? Rashi and many commentaries say that the plague results from the evil eye – not from sin. The tally draws every individual from the general mass, establishing him as a separate unit so he’s judged independently. Therefore, plague strikes him more severely than if he were being watched as part of a community. As a result, G-d instructed Moshe to collect from each individual coins as opposed to counting the individual person. The custom remains today of not counting our brethren individually.

* The reason why a half a shekel is required is to show that G-d has forgiven the Israelites for the sin of the golden calf. They sinned after a half of day when Moshe didn’t return.

* Here is another example that the Torah is not in chronological order: The census took place after the sin of the golden calf which we will read later in the Parsha.

* G-d ordered that a large copper basin with spouts be constructed and put in the yard of the Mishkan. It was filled with water every morning, so the kohanim poured water over their hands and feet before commencing their task. This water was not meant to cleanse them for health hygiene purposes, but more for enhancing them spiritually and to cleanse themselves from impurities. The power of water can change and elevate one spiritually. Here is the source of washing hands whether for the morning ritual, meal ritual and bathroom rituals.

* The shemen hamishcha was prepared by taking numerous spices. Each spice was crushed separately; then they were blended and soaked in water so that their aroma would be absorbed in the water. Olive oil was added to the water, and the mixture was boiled until the water evaporated and only the spiced oil remained. That oil (oil of anointment) was preserved in a flask to be used for the purpose of anointing the kohen gadol and kings from the dynasty of David.

 

Second Portion

* The power of evil strikes again invoking an uneasy feeling that the Israelite leader, Moshe, is dead and therefore confusing the Jews in their calculation of when his return was to be. As a result, they came to their second-in-command, Moshe’s brother, Aharon, and demanded a new conduit, a new go-between to G-d. Apparently Aharon, feeling pressured, instructed them to build a golden calf. The steps Aharon comprised to get to this golden calf was difficult and he believed would take them some time. This delay, Aharon thought, would give Moshe the time needed to return before it was built. However, in their haste and enthusiasm, they finished it rather quickly.

* There is an expression ‘one sin leads to another sin’. Many sages comment that the celebration of the golden calf led to sexual misconduct.

* It’s not exactly clear what was Aharon’s role in this tragedy. The fact that he and his sons remained in the most coveted position in the nation indicates he was not at fault. Although, some commentaries say he did get punished for his role; they hint that there is a link between the sin of the golden calf and the death of Aharon’s two sons, Nadav and Avihu.

The fact, though that the incident occurred under his leadership; even though he personally was not involved, he has to take the responsibility. The captain is responsible for anything that occurs on the ship.

* Moshe breaks the tablets after returning from the mountain and seeing the Israelites in a state of sin. He then punishes the aigel worshipers with death and tests the Israelites with the waters of sotah. This was done by taking the golden calf and burning it; crushed the remains; mixed it with water; and had the Israelites drink it (the sotah was a married woman who was suspected by her husband of adultery. Her integrity was tested by having her drink specially prepared waters, causing her to perish if she was guilty).

 

Third Portion

* Moshe goes up the mountain a second time to get a second set of tablets.

 

Fourth Portion

* Moshe was only able to see the backside of G-d. Apparently seeing the front would be too much for a human to handle. Many commentaries ask what exactly did Moshe mean by saying ‘let me see your presence’.

 

Fifth Portion

* G-d reveals the thirteen attributes of mercy. He informs Moshe a method of guaranteeing mercy in which we invoke as the crux of our Yom Kippur prayers. We frequently apply the virtue of our forefathers Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov. However, these thirteen attributes, if said with proper concentration and sensitivity, will be very effective. Sephardic custom is to say it daily as well.

 

Sixth Portion

* Observing Pesach is mentioned.

* Here is the source of pidyon haben; the redeeming of the first-born. If a person becomes a father of a first born, he has to buy his baby back from the kohen.

* The holiday of Pesach is mentioned.

 

Seventh Portion

* The meeting with G-d on the mountain puts Moshe on the status of an angel. He didn’t sleep or eat for that period.

A Different Type of Hero
   

One of the major questions in the Torah and a story line that’s difficult to comprehend, is how is it possible the Israelites, our ancestors, can sin with the golden calf after seeing so many miracles that G-d has bestowed on them? The whole Egypt experience, the plagues upon their persecutors, and the splitting of the sea was so mesmerizing that all the nations trembled upon hearing what had occurred. However, there were those who spoiled it for the rest. Perhaps an example of the most ineffectiveness of G-d’s revelation is the shameful and pathetic story of Micha. It says that he clung to his idol through the plagues of Egypt and the splitting of the sea. Can you imagine the audacity?

 

 

 

We read with awe the sages words “even a maidservant was able, at the splitting of the Red Sea, to perceive of the Divine what Yechezkel ben Buzy was unable to grasp”. Our ancestors saw more firepower miracles during that generation, than in any time in history. So how can the Jews be so confused and wither away at the first wimpy test of faith?

 

In order to answer the question, we must take a closer look at the statement about the maidservant we just quoted. If indeed a maidservant was capable of such lofty understanding, why is she still referred to as a maidservant; she should be called a prophetess?

 

Apparently, these unique events and highly energized spiritual revelations on their own do not create a prophet. The maidservant, after all the hoopla, still remained a maidservant. To develop prophet status or reach spiritual heights, one must go through character development and self-perfection. The sages have a regiment through the guidance of the Torah on how to achieve these goals. It’s humorous to read about these adventurous Hollywood stars, as well as rock and roll artists, studying Kaballah or whatever the organizers of that contraption call it. For one to get to that lofty level, one would have to go through many steps of Torah study and character fixing. Though one can reach a very high level through being nice, considerate, and kind, where he will develop a tremendous sensitivity toward others. Reaching that level of sensitivity to one’s fellow man, to an extent where the world feels a lot more crisp and sharp, along with the conscious effort to progress in learning Torah, will breed a level of contentment, happiness, and perfection. If these Hollywood stars would have gone through the true Torah system, they wouldn’t be called Hollywood stars, they would be called kaballists!

 

The Mesilat Yesharim equates us to soldiers, and the true heroes are the ones who can control their desires. Apparently, that’s the definition of a strong man, Ish Chayil, one who is able to grow and develop, then he will appreciate the miracles.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Show Me Your Glory
   

One of the most intriguing and philosophical passages in the Torah is in this week’s Parsha, when Moshe, who was on the mountain receiving the tablets, asks G-d .”Let me see Your glory”. The response was “No man has seen my face and lived.” The sages say that G-d had only showed him His back. Many commentaries asked what exactly was Moshe’s request? It’s a loaded question with many different angles that we can explore. There are many interesting ideas (since we are such a creative people), which the sages raise as to what Moshe’s intent was.

Let’s start with a Gemarah (Brachot 7). The sages state that Moshe wished to know why there are righteous people that suffer and wicked people who seem to be rewarded. This is an age-old question that G-d seemingly refused to answer. The Chofetz Chaim offers a telling parable in this regard. A Shabbat guest noticed how the shamash distributed honors to members seated all over his host synagogue. Puzzled, he asked the Shamash, “Why didn’t you distribute the honors in a more orderly fashion?” The shamash answered ‘How do you know there is no order in my system? What do you know about our synagogue anyway? Do you know who was honored in previous weeks?”.  This is just what G-d told Moshe. “You ask me why the righteous suffer and the wicked enjoy reward. Yet, do you really know when reward begins and when it ends? Do you have any idea what was yesterday? Do you have any idea of what events happened in the past and who the righteous and evil were in former incarnations?

 

“Everything we see”, says the Chatam Sofer, “we see vaguely.” A person does not know beforehand what present events will lead to in the future as is demonstrated by the miracle of Purim. “You shall see my back” (Shemot 33:23) can be figuratively read, as “You shall see my ending”. Only in the end, do we grasp the purpose of any act,  “My front cannot be seen”, we cannot know the reason for an event ‘up front” before its conclusion.

 

Here’s another idea of ‘show me your glory’. We know we are destined to reach potential goals. However, there is a percentage of effort one has to make in order for the bracha to kick in. One cannot stay at home and say; oh it’s destined for me to receive that. This is a common dilemma when dating to get married. Is there a set amount of dates one has to go on? Is there a certain amount of pursuit in which one has to do to receive a date? When does trying stop and nuisance begins? In regard to having children, to what extent does one have to go in order to accomplish that goal? This question can be applied in many variations in making a living and health issues.

 

Moshe asked, “Show me Your glory.” Show me the fine line between effort and it’s in G-ds hands now.”

 

Interestingly, we often play, what would you say and do if you are in his shoes? Although, we talk to G-d every day, what would you ask G-d if you had the honor to bring down the Torah?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are Colognes and Perfumes Allowed on Pesach?

 

With the holiday of Purim coming to a close, the race is on to CLEAN CLEAN CLEAN for Pesach. Although we are still wearing our winter coats, spring training has already started in Florida where the Mets and the Yankees are practicing. The enthusiasm of spring, especially when we flirt with a 60-degree sunny day, is so great that we forget to take our bulky winter coat. We often pay the price toward the evening hours where temperatures dip to the 30’s. I remember going to a baseball game in early April at the old Shea Stadium. It was a beautiful nice day but it was freezing with a ferocious wind at the ballpark. But the thought of spring, as well as Pesach, gives many of us such an energetic boost. The anticipation of Pesach, a beautiful holiday that personifies spring, is welcomed by many.

 

To get us in the mood for the holiday, a discussion about some of the things that are and are not permissible would be kind of interesting.

One may ask, are we allowed to put on perfumes and colognes on Pesach? Why would it be an issue, one may ask?

First and foremost, one has to know a basic concept on the rules of chametz. The Rambam (Maimonides) rules, and it’s also stated in the Shulchan Aruch, that “if a dog will not find it edible then it is permissible to use”; so it seems like there’s no problem. However, Rav Moshe Feinstein zt”l many years ago, who revolutionized the practical applications, rules “even if something in its present state is inedible but if you can possibly distill it and produce edible chametz,  then we would call it chametz.” Many unnatural alcohols mixed with various chemicals if they can be restored to their original fit, then its chametz. Methanol and isopropyl are not chametz. Perfumes and colognes though, are unfit and have no chance of becoming chametz. Some say the scent of the perfume might be considered fit and since it is the primary ingredient of the perfume then its problematic. However most incline to consider perfumes and colognes permissible. This application is only for pure liquid state.

 

 

 

 

Sincerely,
Rabbi Avi Matmon
Spark of Jewish Experience

Parshat Toldos

 

“A Cup of Coffee 

 

&

A Quick Thought”

Steaming Cup of Coffee
Spark Of Jewish Experience
  Toldos

November 24, 2011
27 Cheshvan, 5772

Dear Friends,

 

In appreciation to the staff of The Afikim Foundation for all their help, and to Torahanytime.com for giving us the mic.

 

We are now displaying business ads in our newsletter. If you are interested in placing an ad, please email me or call 917-804-7692. It’s completely tax deductible and the proceeds go to teaching people Torah. Be a part of the Mitzvah!

 

Please print out this newsletter and say over a great D’var Torah at the Friday night Shabbos table.

 

Please forward to a friend and be a partner in spreading Torah.

 

Dedicate a newsletter, shuir and a CD in memory of a loved one.

 

In This Issue
Parshat Toldos Highlights
Parshat Toldos – Why Did Jacob Receive the Prestigious Bracha in Such a Manor – Stealing?
A Lesson to be Learned from the Penn State Scandal
The Bar Mitzvah Boy Who Pulled a Fast One

 

Parshat Toldos Highlights

 

▪ The parsha starts off by reaffirming Isaac is, in fact, Abraham’s son; the commentaries mentioned he even looked like his father. This was purposely done by G-d because Abraham and Sarah could not have kids for many years and people might doubt that Isaac was really his.

 

▪ After years of Isaac and Rivka not having children, Rivka is finally pregnant with twins.

 

▪ Rivka gives birth to Eisav, who has a full head of red hair. The second child that is born is named Yaacov.

 

▪ Isaac loves Eisav while Rivka loves Yaacov.

 

▪ Eisav sells his birthright for a cup of soup to his brother Yaacov (the incident occurred the day their grandfather Abraham dies).

 

▪ There’s a famine in the land and Isaac and Rivka go to Avimelech, King of the Philistines. Puzzling the script is the same as his father Abraham, who went down with Sarah, his wife, to both Philistine and Egypt. Isaac tells the king the same story as his father did, many years before, ‘she’s (Rivka) my sister’. The reason is people might kill me so they can take my wife. Avimelech finds out it’s his wife and orders ‘anyone touches this woman will be killed’.

 

▪ The Philistines felt threatened by Isaac’s successes in Gerar. They did not honor his treaty with his father by filling the wells in which Abraham dug forcing Isaac to leave. Isaac settled in the valley of Gerar where he dug three wells and successfully found water.

 

▪ Avimelech makes a treaty with Isaac.

 

▪ Eisav finds wives that are not appropriate.

 

▪ Isaac asks Eisav to hunt and make him his favorite meal so he can give him an important blessing.

 

▪ Yaacov deceives Isaac and impersonates Eisav on instructions from his mother and goes and receives the bracha from his blind father.

 

▪ Eisav vows to kill Yaacov.

 

▪ Rivka is not happy with the quality of the girls in Canaan; she convinces Isaac to send Yaacov to her family in Padena Aram.

 

▪ Eisav saw that Isaac sent Yaacov to Padena Aram to find a wife. He too realized the Caanite women were not good. So he marries the daughter of Yishmael, his uncle.

Parshat Toldos – Why Did Jacob Recieve the Prestigious Bracha in Such a Manor – Stealing?
abraham's tent

One of the most puzzling questions in the Torah is why did Yaacov have to demean himself to an uncharacteristic extent and resort to stealing the most prestigious bracha of all time? Secondly, and equally puzzling, his mother – of all people – is the mastermind. It’s as if these personalities, our beloved ancestors (strait laced honest Yaacov and his beloved mother Rivka) have taken on different characters for this role, for this operation, ‘OPERATION: GET THE BRACHA’. It seems kind of odd. Rav Gedalia Schorr (Or Gedalyahu) offers a riveting answer. He says, both of Issac’s sons, Yaacov and Eisav have come to correct the character of the first man, Adam. Yaacov before the sin and Eisav after the sin.

We’re able to derive from the Chumash that both boys, Yaacov and Eisav, were exceptionally talented in their own right. Each brother, according to the Zohar, had an equally important mission to better the world and eventually pave the road for the quick arrival of the Mashiach. We see from the Scripture, ‘ish tam yoshev ohalim’ (wholesome man abiding in tents) referring to Yaacov. His mission was to expand knowledge of math, science, and philosophy, as well as increase sensitivity towards fellow man, etc., through the Torah and through G-d’s words. Yaacov’s task was to appeal to people (the elite) who are already committed to G-d but want to expand their horizons in spirituality. This scenario is similar to the state of Adam in Gan Eden before the sin, which were basically, to increase G-d’s message, and having the luxury of very minimal intervention of the evil forces.

Eisav, on the other hand, had a different task. His mission was to convince the people of the world who are not believers. He was given the talent of ‘ish yodeah tzayid’ (a man who knows how to hunt). A hunter tricks his prey by setting traps; these traps are set through clever words combined with illusions and stretching the truth. G-d empowered Eisav with the ability to fight the evil powers by tricking it. One needs all different kinds of props and sparks to motivate oneself and overcome the negative powers so it can be easier to believe in G-d. Eisav was also given the ability to enjoy physical pleasures so he can show the world you can enjoy physicality and also serve G-d to the utmost.

However, Eisav used his tools in a wrong way. Instead of overpowering the evil powers, they overpowered him. He used his tremendous talents of hunting, giving, and receiving pleasures, for his own satisfaction. With those powerful tools used incorrectly, he became a dangerous monster on a collision course to destroy the world.

It was his mother, Rivka, who realized Eisav’s failure. She knew the importance to fill the void that Eisav has abandoned. The logical choice was Yaacov, who would now be required to fulfill both roles. This strait laced honest man now must show the ability to trick and stretch the truth and be a hunter as well as his natural ability to enhance the world intellectually.

Therefore, Yaacov receives the crucial bracha transformed into both Eisav and himself.

As Jews, we have a double task of both Yaacov and Eisav in the world. This very difficult responsibility entitles us to be the chosen people. That is the reason we, as Jews, are always looked under a magnifying glass.

A Lesson to be Learned From the Penn State Scandal 
   spark plug

In the last few weeks we discovered ugliness in the establishment of American pride. Penn State, which has one of the most prestigious college football programs in the country, has been hit by scandal. One of their former top assistant coaches was accused of raping a minor (10 year old boy) in the shower at the athletic facility on campus by a graduate assistant coach. The incident occurred in 2002.The graduate assistant coach, Mike McQueary, did not stop the violator, Jerry Sandusky, at the time of the occurrence; although the next day, he did report the incident to his superior, the famous and legendary Penn State head coach, Joe Paterno. Paterno, in turn, also informed his superiors.The fact that McQueary did not stop him (Sandusky raping the boy) resulted in many reported death threats against him. I gave a fascinating lecture last week (there is a link to it on Torahanytime.com) on what goes through the mind of a person who is confronted with this situation. What does one do upon seeing your superior, mentor, and friend in a position committing a crime? It’s a very interesting lecture and I suggest it not be missed.

But it’s important to note, the hierarchy of the school didn’t report it to the police. Although some speculate the power and influence in which Coach Paterno had enabled the case to be swept under the rug; regardless if it was reported to the police. To tarnish the reputation of the school and its beloved coaching staff might be a far greater sin.

Penn State College football is a moneymaking machine and its coach is legendary. Who would want to break up this mega giant?

A week after the story broke, out eight more boys (now they’re older) came out as victims of Sandusky. The number as of November 18 is at forty, and unfortunately is increasing. In 2002, Mike McQueary, Joe Paterno and co. (Coach Joe Paterno and the President of the Penn State have since been fired) had a chance to stop this monster and they didn’t. Now there are 40 potential predators whose lives were ruined and possibly will go out and ruin other lives. This is the result, as Dr Neil Levey suggests, having their (Penn State administration and athletic dept) priorities misplaced. They asked themselves what’s more important; we know their answer.

I read something very interesting by Rav Henoch Leibowitz z”l (in his book Chidushea Halev on this week’s Parsha) which pertains to the above shame. When Eisav found out that Yaacov stole the brachot, he screamed loud and troublesome, out of despair. The sages suggested that many hundreds of years later, as a measure for measure, the Jews screamed loud and troublesome, out of despair, upon hearing the decree of destruction that Eisav’s descendant, Haman orchestrated against them. But why was Yaacov (the Jews, his descendants) punished? Yaacov followed his mother’s advice. She actually convinced him (and he knew it himself) the brachot are important for the continuation of the world and he has to take the responsibility of not only his, but also his brother Eisav. Therefore he was required to take the bracha at any cost.

The reason is, Rav Henoch suggests that Yaacov didn’t feel enough pain in his heart for his brother losing the bracha. Even though he didn’t deserve it, there should have been certain sadness in Yaacov. It’s our duty to feel for our brethren even though it has no bearings on us. This is what is expected of us. Feel for your brother.

If one does not have sensitivities to his fellow to the highest degree, then eventually relationships will degenerate. Here, the priorities and morals of the Penn State hierarchy were not proper. A human being is not so important. They didn’t want to puncture the school’s image; now that’s important! It would cause them great financial loss. Money and image were more important than human beings. With many universities, it is not about higher education and being a better mentch, it’s a cash cow and it’s our duty to milk the system, stepping on anybody that gets in the way. After all, isn’t this what America is all about?

The Bar Mitzvah Boy Who Pulled a Fast One 
   parking ticket

I was at a Bar Mitzvah a few weeks ago and a friend, Uri, asked me to play Sherlock Holmes and solve this case:
Question: Two boys are born the same year, Avi who is older then Ronny by a week.  But when they reached Bar Mitzvah, Ronny will be a Bar Mitzvah first by at least 3 weeks. How is that possible?
Answer: During a leap year, there are 2 Adar’s, Adar Aleph and Adar Bet.  Avi was born the 29th of Adar Aleph while Ronny was born the 3rd of Adar Bet. When their Bar Mitzvah year rolled around, there was only one Adar. Since Ronny was born on the 3rd of Adar, he goes first while Avi has to wait till the 29th.
Sincerely,
Rabbi Avi Matmon
Spark of Jewish Experience