Spark of Jewish Experience

When one thinks about Pesach, the first thing that comes to mind is matzah. It is called ‘lechem oni-bread of affliction’. Another way of understanding ‘lechem oni’ is ‘lechem shea onim alav de’varim harbeh -bread over which many things are said’. This is the reason when we are about to start ‘avadim hayinu-we were slaves’, after reciting the ‘ma nishtanah-why is this night different from every other night’; we uncover the matzah and point at it. At this juncture, we are called upon to ‘talk’ about the exodus of Egypt. The very word ‘Pesach’ has been interpreted as ‘peh-sach-the mouth talks’, to stress the importance of putting the meaning of the event into words. As slaves, words were not spoken because slaves are not allowed to speak or to think. It’s important at the Seder to verbally read the Hagaddah from beginning to end. We see speaking as a sign of freedom. Any American can tell you the special privilege that is granted to us in freedom of speech; it’s a constitutional right. The Americans took example from the exodus of Egypt and incorporated them in their very own experiences and constitution. There is also an emphasis on the father and son dialog, because of the very reason we gave above, ‘freedom’. That relationship doesn’t exist when you’re a slave. There is no tradition that is passed down; one is obliged only to his master. However, freedom has a lot of fringe benefits and strengthening  that bond of the father and son is one of them.

In some places, it is customary for the father to repeat the mah nishtanah after the child has finished. The reason may be perhaps the child asked without understanding. It’s important to note that it is desirable that the entire Haggadah should be translated and explained for the benefit of all the Seder participants. After all, the Seder is not meant to be an empty ritual, but an effort to grasp and relive the experience of our ancestors. Somebody who does not understand the Haggadah has actually not fulfilled his obligation.

Another reason why the emphasis on ‘talking’ is important is that our very essence is speech. When Jacob came to receive the bracha from his father Isaac, Isaac said ‘hakol kol Yaacov v’hayadim yedei Eisav’-the voice is the voice of Jacob and the hands are the hands of Eisav’. Jacob’s power is in the speech. This is our strength and we are utilizing this gift that G-d gave us with pride at the Seder.

Besides Torah, which is part and parcel with speech and is our life force, there is another advantage, which we exercised that I feel proud of. When I was younger in the late 1960’s & early 70’s, the 25 year-old generation would create rallies and an enthusiastic energetic environment to make their voices heard for Soviet Jewry.  It worked by putting pressure on the government, and it unified the Jews whether they were American or Russian. It was a tremendous show of solidarity and it showed that with ‘kol Yaacov’, we can make a difference. The Seder is not the time to keep quiet; one should ask, answer, sing whatever they can, to strengthen our gift.

Baruch Hashem, there is always an abundance of weddings before Passover. It never fails, as one watches the bride and groom, to reminisce when we actually took those very steps ourselves. How interesting it is to witness a couple’s significant moment in their lives. I’m sure one can guess that a chupah ceremony has strong traditions and deep meanings. There is a lingering question that is often asked about the breaking of the glass at the end of the ceremony. We have learned it’s for the remembrance of our holy Temple, which was destroyed approximately two thousand years ago. This unpleasant memory is incorporated into our joyous occasion so we should not feel overly happy where we experienced such grief as a nation.

But why such an emphasis on diffusing the joy? Why not live with having a purely happy occasion without a bit of sorrow? Why can’t we just be happy to the fullest? Furthermore, one would have to look at a significant event in our history – which I’ve been scratching my head in wonderment – in order to understand what Rav Chaim Shmuelevits is trying to convey to us in this d’var Torah in which I had the pleasure to tell over.

The lineage of the Mashiach comes from the tribe of Yehuda, but the turning of events of how the inception came about will startle you. Yehuda’s daughter in-law was widowed twice; G-d punished and killed Yehuda’s two sons (Tamar’s 1st and 2nd husbands.) Consequently, he told her to go to her father’s house until his third son is old enough to marry. Jewish tradition prevents a widow from marrying out of her husband’s family if she didn’t have children (although this does not apply today.) Usually, the brother is required to marry his brother’s wife, in order to preserve the deceased sibling’s name (yibum), or else he has to give her Chalitza (equivalent of a divorce). But, in light of what happened, Yehuda gave her the old line ‘don’t call me, I’ll call you’ and as the third son came of age, the call to Tamar never came. Perhaps he viewed her as bad luck and was reluctant to give over his son, fearing the black widow would strike again. Tamar, the widowed daughter in-law, had an intuition of the importance of the family and would not give up the right to be the mother of the messianic family. She disguised herself as a prostitute and seduced the widowed Yehuda. These uncharacteristic actions of both Yehuda and Tamar have put every living being off guard, as we will soon see. The news came out that Tamar was pregnant which angered Yehuda. ‘She is bound to our family and has committed a severe violation; she should be burned,’ he proclaimed, not knowing that it was he who impregnated her. Tamar made Yehuda realize through her discrete hint, that it was he who will be the father of her twins. Even though he was in front of the leaders of the world, Yehuda earned great admiration for his admittance, showing honesty, seeking to do what’s right and taking responsibility, therefore resulting in being crowned leader by his father and brothers.

But why does the Mashiach have to come in this manner? The great Jewish savior is presented in such an un-dignifying way; this is how you want the Mashiach to come? The mere thought of Yehuda not knowing who the mother of the messianic lineage is at the time of the physical relationship, is mind boggling!

Rav Chaim teaches us the world operates in such a manner that every holy act cannot exist unless it has a small mixture of negativity. Therefore, the Mashiach would not be able to come in a natural way because the evil powers were too strong and would not allow the inception of this significant occurrence.

This leads us to this week’s Parsha where we realize that the power of evil could prevent goodness from blossoming unless the evil is satiated. Then and only then goodness can operate. The Torah mentions that on Yom Kippur, besides bringing a sacrifice to G-d, an identical young he-goat would be given to Satan. ‘What!!’ one may ask ‘Satan?’ Am I watching a B-movie late Saturday night on one of those low-budget channels? Perhaps it seems to be some form of idol worship. By throwing a bone to the devil, you’ll prevent any additional intervention.

My father had dinner once with his cousin, Mr. Mayer Abraham, who was one of the leaders of the Bukharian-Afgani community in Queens. They were on a business trip in the Far East.  Mr. Abraham left some food on his dinner plate. My father asked him ‘why don’t you finish? We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow.’ He retorted back ‘I always leave a little piece for Satan so he should be happy also. After reading the d’rasha by Rav Chaim, I realize where Mr. Abraham’s source came.

Rav Chaim quotes the Ramban who lived a thousand years ago. The breaking of the glass quiets Satan so he doesn’t harm the couple. He is satisfied with the event not being 100% pure joy because the guests remember an unpleasant memory. It is the chatan that reads ‘if I forget Jerusalem (where the Temple was destroyed) let my right hand forget its skill.’

Some communities are scared of the evil eye. Therefore, they perform a real chupah the night before, and the chupah at the hall with all the guests is staged. Realizing the importance of feeling a little sorrow when breaking the glass and its significance of fending off Satan, one should conclude there is no need for additional protection of the chatan and kallah.