Pursuit of honor

This article was constructed with the help of either writings, lectures or shiurim of Rabbi’s Chaim Shmuelevitz z’l,  Yissachar frand, Dr. Abba Goldman

Our sages teach us, there are certain character flaws which one possesses that are so destructive, so devastating, ‘it could take you out of this world’. In other words, one can be thrown off course and lose any line of reasoning, any happiness, and any satisfaction, because of this deficiency.

 As one is well aware of, the Sages are very careful, perhaps that’s an understatement, of usage of words. We have to think many times over why they employed, so brilliantly, a word or a phrase when a statement was made.
The Sages use the word ‘RODEF KAVOD’- pursuit of honor; RODEF implies a very harsh and intense connotation. The reason why the use of RODEF is associated with KAVOD is once a person is enticed, naturally, even the biggest tzaddik, the most intellectual, can pursue it with a vigor. At times, the drive for honor, will reach a level to such an extent that he will be looked at in the eyes of others, with his arrogant statements, as a buffoon.  Though, at times, with the power of persuasion his blinded pursuit of honor can be dangerous.
 Perhaps, now we might be able to explain the difficulties of Parshas Sh’lach as to how to understand the sin of the Spies. One must bear in mind that the individuals about whom we are speaking were righteous people. Answering the question of what happened to them? Why did they come back with such a negative report? We know from Sages that it was not just a “negative” report. It was a report that bordered on heresy. The Rabbis interpret the statement “ki chazak hu mimenu” [“they are stronger than us”] to have the nuance that “they are stronger than Him”. They doubted the ability of the Almighty to successfully take them into Eretz Yisrael. After all they witnessed, this statement certainly borders on heresy if not being heresy itself!
What happened to the Spies? The Zohar addresses this problem and states that the motivating factor that led the Spies to this debacle was a matter of ‘Kavod’ [honor seeking]. At this point in time, these people all occupied positions of prominence in the Wilderness. They were afraid that when the Jewish people came into the Land of Israel, there would be a new administration, a new world order, and as a result, they would lose their positions of prominence.
 They lost their objectivity. They had their own agenda. Their agenda was to NOT go into Eretz Yisrael and not to lose the prestige and importance that they had maintained in the society of the Wilderness. This agenda warped and perverted their whole view of Eretz Yisrael and of the Almighty’s ability, to the extent that they said things that bordered on heresy itself.

Another prime example of seeking honor is the wicked Haman who presumably had everything and yet felt he had nothing. Here is a man who was second in command to the king of the most powerful nation in the world and worshiped by all subjects of the vast super power – Persian Empire; however, he was not satisfied with everything because one Jew, Mordechai, would not bow down to him. How could it be that Haman even noticed the lack of this minuscule amount of honor amidst the overwhelming flood of glory that was his? Perhaps, if not for the dangerous predicament our ancestors were in, the way he conducted himself through his obsession would have been observed as quite humorous.
Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz zt”l explains that one is never able to achieve satisfaction through honor. As much honor as you will receive, you will find yet more that you must have, and so your craving will never be satisfied. It’s like a cat chasing after his own tail.
 A great insight by Dr. Abba Goldman who says” the pursuit of honor develops because of one’s insecurities. Therefore, he compensates by enforcing his authority upon others, not believing that he will receive honor naturally”.
Mordechai saw right through Haman and Haman knew it. Haman realized Mordechai didn’t think much of him and it bothered him to no end.
Our sages write, “Those who chase honor, honor will run away from them”. Rabbi Akiva Tatz teaches us an important lesson in human insights. He says, “As man gets older, his desire for physical pleasures for women decreases. However, as compensation, there is an increased desire for honor”.
HOW TO DETERMINE YOU HAVE THE “PURSUIT OF HONOR” BUG
Everyone, in the general public, thinks they are humble and this article cannot be talking about them. It perfectly describes their wives, husbands, friends, teachers, Rabbis.  Perhaps, they’re correct in their assessment. However, there are many interesting methods and perhaps, here is an interesting one to determine if one’s drive toward ego is such. Mind you, there has to be some degree of honor that a person needs, however, one has to gauge that he should not exceed the required amount. So what is the Litmus test?
 Please listen to this interesting observation. Falling asleep, at times, can be difficult. There are those who the minute they place their head on the pillow – they’re sleeping. Others, though who are not so fortunate, start to unwind, at times, forty minutes later? During that waiting grace, many have developed methods of how to fall asleep. One very popular method is to envision pleasant thoughts or being in a nice relaxing environment.
For instance, I envision lying on a hammock by a pond, between mountains where there is a waterfall in the background. That usually does the trick. Another nice thought, is sitting on the bridge, on the USS Star ship Enterprise cruising at warp speed. The galaxy never looked nicer.
However, one can sound the alarm of “honor” when this soothing thought, more or less, is his lullaby. The scenario, often repeated, is being at the podium, giving an exhilarating speech in front of a banquet  of well-wishers who are applauding your every breath. Then you break out into a song that brings the crowd to a standing ovation. Everyone is impressed.
 We all, in our adolescent, have acted out in our room, in front of the mirror, pretending  taking the last shot at the buzzer at the basketball game or hitting the game, winning home run in the seventh game of the World Series. However, if these dreams of glory linger into our adult life it can lead to negative results and disappointments.
Dr Goldman says: “G-d gave each one of us special powers. Yes, it’s okay sometimes to dream; in fact it’s healthy. However, one cannot take it to the level of RODEF. G-d wants us to be ourselves. He wants us to be the best version of ourselves and that means being modest in our actions. An example given of one with a good voice is asked to pray as a chazzan. He should not think that he is deserving of great honor because he can sing so beautifully. The ability to sing is a gift from G-d and that is true of all the human abilities that a person may possess. We are charged to use the gifts G-d gives us appropriately in His service. By acting with too much pride one is insulting his very essence.
 It’s funny; RODEF is a human trait that can be used in an extreme way.  The commandment in the passuk [verse] to pursue justice is stated in Devarim Tzedek, Tzedek tirdof. (Literally, “Justice, Justice shall you pursue.”) Also, we find a parallel usage: “Seek out peace, and pursue it.” (Bakesh shalom, v’radfehu.) [Tehillim 34:15]. One can use this powerful energy, for justice and peace, in a positive direction.
  One has to know the dangers of the unconscious pursuit of honor. The spies fell prey to it, Haman ruined his life and the life of others for that desire, and it’s frightening, because to some degree we are all prone to get tested by it at some time.

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